by Dylan800B
This was a very ordinary story without much in the way of twists, plots or even anything to keep the readers interest.
If it was your first ok, then your english was ok, construction ok, but without substance and titillation, it was always going to go nowhere, maybe Mills and Boone might be interested in mundality of this genre, but for me it missed the mark for this site and this topic
But not a lot of tension, either. The environment (including school students and personnel) does add a bit, all by itself...but those possibilities were not optimized!
4*
You need to go back to school.
Barely got to the request for forgiveness before I couldn't forgive ALL the mistakes.