All Comments on 'A Rush of Blood to the Head Ch. 04'

I'm about to speak daggers to one of my Literotica favorited authors ( but use none, t.y. Shakes' ). Before I'd emulate what Mark did there's a better chance that I would rather go to Princess Diana's grave. Dig her up. Press Lady Di's rotting, worm infested lips to mine, give CPR & take chance of miraculously bring her back to life and her falling in love with me.

Yes, I'd commit necrophelia before I'd reconcile with a wife who went to where I sweat for a paycheck & fucked in stairwell with third party witness one my co-workers. GirlintheMoon has talent but Eudora Welty, Virginia Woolf and the Bronte sisters united and reincarnate wouldn't try to sell this bill of goods.

There's just no coming back from certain acts in terms of reconciliation. Look Lucy doesn't deserve to be stoned. The downward slide from bipolar bluebood spouse to living with parents with florist gig and student was a nicely crafted hybrid of penance and rehabilitation.But alas, GITM had to try to give Loose Lucy back the whole enchilada. DENIED. No sane man would .

This story is for the terminally romantic with borderline flagellant and flatulant tendencies. Unbelieveable and unrated .

more a fairy tale then real life.

After three cracking chapters this one meandered before falling flat. It's not that I don't buy that there could be a reconciliation but I couldn't buy the change from a sassy smart woman to a woman defined by a man. 3*

I really loved that story of two people with completly differrent upbringing, with Lucy who made incredobly stupid mistake.

In a way I find it realistic, maybe I'am just an hopeless romantic and that would never happen in real life.

Anyway you are really a great writer and I love all your stories !

The story was not really my thing. Well until the end at least. I do like how the characters felt réal. I am glad to see they reconciled

Although I am curious how there are no consequences resulting from his dragging her across shards of broken glass and slicing her feet up. Not suggesting prison; but she would have been pretty much crippled for a short time at least.

Other than that, I absolutely loved your characters, they changed, they adapted and at least one became the person she wanted to be. A compelling tale of tenacity, perseverance and above all, hope and redemption.

I wish it could have been longer; but I loved it nonetheless. 5/5

Thanks for some powerful writing! You should be proud you steered this towards a thought provoking conclusion. Some people will rail at you, others will praise you for it. I simply appreciate it because it is clear that this story did exactly what you wanted it to do. Strong Work! Thanks for contributing!

The stupid assed moron is back. I hope you will keep writing on this site. Imagination and a gift for expression are pretty rare here.

a story about two people experiencing real feelings and traveling through events to an honest conclusion. Girlinthemoon's story is so much more than merely well-written...it is full of intelligence about love, about family. There is less dialogue in this chapter (at least less in its first few pages) than we expect in a GITM story, but every line of dialogue that is here conveys pages (more than pages), worlds of usual literotica narrative.

GITM is wise beyond just being smart.

And (although this bit of praise is not necessary), is there any other author here at Lit who can take the trite phrase, "He fucked my brains out," and make it mean so much? Girlinthemoon has managed to fuck her reader's brains out and made it a pleasurable, wonderful experience!

You have written such a beautiful story here, and you do so well at capturing the emotions of your characters. Honestly it's almost a shame to know you're posting them here where the anons like the one below me are going to threaten and rant and pout because you write real people and not stock cut outs like they want. Keep it up, and don't let the trolls get you down.

Really, it's true. I've read 100s of stories in this genre, from the best (you know the names). You haven't posted so much yet, but this one just astounded me. As much as I hate to say it, you're wasting your time here (but PLEASE do use this site to"practice" a little more). You really should think about writing professionally. I'm a guy, so no, I don't read "romance" novels. I'm sure after reading this though that you could easily succeed there. Go for it...

The facade has been lifted and two wonderful people emerged. From the posh country club set to down home regular people who underneath really loved each other. Who'd of thought it? Really nice.

You are a real writer. I would buy this. I don't know what your ambitions are as a writer, but you write great characters. Congratulations!

Are there worse kinds of narcissist? Aren't all myopic?

Great character painting, excellent wordsmithing and very enjoyable read.

The story twist, to me, is that the narcissist realizes that others' are also wrapped up in their own lives and often cannot overcome their flaws sufficiently to call her on her own, or to let them matter so much.

Well done, thank you for writing. 5*

Regards,

-Pultoy

I am not usually in the corner of getting back with a cheating wife, but your story does touch where it should. One of the very few ( the only one of two for me) that they should give it another try. They never really gave things a fair shake. Mark and Lucy need to learn how to be themselves with each other. At least one more chapter where they do get help or just learn each other on their own. I can see he opens a one man shop there in her home town. They buy a smaller house and start having children. Sheri and John become friends and they learn that what they have is what is needed and the best. I a mislay BTB crowd, but in this case, not so much. Great read

This story is so like most of the stories I have dealt with as a marriage counselor and therapist. Real people, living, finding happiness, making mistakes either growing or becoming stilted. Some finding their bliss; others finding their hell. The ones who find a way to let the mistakes go and stop blaming others for felt pain find that bliss. The ones who continue to blame and daydream of ways to make the other feel pain find their hell on earth. Wish I could give this author more than five stars. The plot, the characters( what development), the story structure, perfect syntax with wonderful flow. My only problem is that it ended and there is no more to read and live with. Thank you for sharing your creative energy.

Again, a superbly crafted story of wonderfully flawed, yet beautiful characters. I love how you broke them down and rebuilt them. Although the main focus was Lucy, you showed us Mark's personna too. Both made mistakes, but both realized those mistakes were driving them apart. Her affair was the catalyst that woke them up to see what was real.

The groundwork was laid for a very emotional, plausible reconciliation. The end with Shari's baby, was poignantly wonderful.

A pity the trolls can't/won't see this story for what it is, a masterpiece.

GIM, you are the by far one of the best writers here!!!

Thank you,

M1**************************************

Brilliantly done...Succinct without that verbose pretentiousness that passes for good writing on most free sites. As a story-teller, you my dear have mastered the art of the First Person POV,but, we don't want to dwell inside the protagonist's head perpetually, do we? Sometimes the story needs to be shown than being told and I for one would like to hear your authorial voice once in a while; all I am trying to say is that, justify your considerable talents of story-telling by expanding into multiple POVs.

Quite simply one of the better writers among the very few on this site, I'd pay to read your creations.

You truly have a talent to draw the reader in. Well done

This story is worth a re-read, it's very dynamic and with subtle nuances that fill out a full emotional picture. I have enjoyed your previous stories, and I'm looking forward to future stories. The reconciliation is believable, Mark was going way out on a limb, and it payed off. It's a good thing that counseling was mentioned in the story. Good counseling will give them a chance, along with commitment. I enjoy consequence stories, but I'm not among those who insult other readers, and I don't insult authors.

They had their regrets about what they had done, but don't we all? At least they were doing something positive about it.

A truly mature look at the ups and downs in marital relationships. A very heartfelt read. Thank you.

Tremendous story, love how it flowed, loved Lucy's introspective mind and the end, fabulous!

Good character development and a story with a plot worth reaing. That it is well crafted and edited is a huge plus. Thanks for sharing your talent. Wish I could give you multiple 5s. 5*

Great writing but terrible storytelling. Mark is still and rightfully so, full of anger and rage over the shit Lucy put him through so no way do I buy this unbelievable RAAC ending.

Lucy planned on leaving hubby for her fuckbuddy and no amount of counseling will fix that. You do yourself such a disservice as an author with these weak assed RAAC tales GITM.

A GirlInTheMoon story I really, really liked. The characters were likeable.

Thanks.

I do to but with a - in front. any dumber and they would not be vegetables, they would be stones

The arc of the characters was well done,it is very accurate in portraying two people who are attracted to each other yet never really know why,then proceed to live as others expect them to and drift apart.She saw the impish man with a twinkle to him,he saw the unpretensious gal,they married,then he turned into the uptught lawyer and she into the social set world,both hated it but pretended to live it.The end is interesting,because the illusion has died and left grounds for reconciliation,because they are building a new relationship from the ground up,not rebuilding the old. It is a lot more real then the btb stories or the miraculous reconciliations where the old life comes back with benefits as if nothing happened,neither of which is real.

To the author,thank you,and it would be fun to see how they do and the side characters,too. Your writing reminds me of Kirsten Ashley,with fun side characters..maybe put it in Romance so anon cowards don't trash it:)

Crackling, electric talent ! Wow. You GITM can write, whew .

Why are you wasting your time here ?

About the story, very good writing , story-telling, obscured that Lucy & Mark should

not have stayed together . Lost baby, then why stay together ? The first 3 chapters

made that clear. Especially the bathroom scene. That's why the last chapter fell

flat . The forced happy reconciliation ending . This is the second story with a RAAC.

LSD was really tickled. Wasn't he,lol !

I excitedly ( is that a word?) await your next offering as

AMerryMan

I read the story first thing this morning and gave it a quick 5 stars because it was very well written and, except for the motel rape scene, realistic - all by itself. Then over the day I thought more about the story and was less satisfied. This would have been the perfect chapter if they broke up a couple of years after losing the baby that forced them to get married. They could have decided that they did their duty and moved on and then realized they really missed each other. That would have worked.

But there was chapter 3. She burned the house down on their marriage and he obliterated the remains. After reading that chapter, I was convinced that there would be no reconciliation. Both committed unforgivable crimes against the other. She blew up his professional life without a thought. He viciously rapes her and walks away. How could there not be any discussion of the first rape? When she is kicked out of her house without any funds, I find it inconceivable that she would not have used his crime to her advantage.

The Lucy in this story is not the same woman in the first three chapters. Why wouldn't she have had contact with her parents? They are nice people who have the same kind of marriage that she and Mark had. If Mark was attracted to her because she didn't come from a privileged background, he would have wanted to know about her family. In this chapter he finds her background refreshing. It makes no sense.

The problem that I have with GIM stories is that she gets off on having a wife, in this case married for 7 years, suddenly rut with her husband's enemy or co-worker and think she is in love with a soul mate at the drop of a hat. Given her past, I fully expected to read that Lucy fucked her friend's virile husband while she was in the hospital delivering his latest child. I don't think normal women are like that. Nor do I think that normal men will rape their wives no matter how angry they are. On a positive note, I liked this chapter and your last story very much. I have always thought you were a very good writer but think that some of your stories are too over the top. I think you can write interesting stories about normal people. Stories like "Finding Normal" aren't. Thanks for your work. Your stories are much better than most of the stuff that has been submitted lately. My second vote is 4 Stars for a 4.5 average. Thanks

He couldn't let her go, what an unexpected turn. Nicely done , I never expected him to go after her and forgive her.

I read all 4 chapters and must say you did an excellent job of entertaining me. I found the characters very real. Need I say more?

GitM can put it down, she's good. But I don't see the husband coming back, he did nothing wrong. So why is he the one trying to start the RAAC. He misses her, so what, there a millions of people that misses their ex's but not trying to go through the BS again. But an over all good story.

I forgot to say that I wanted to see what she wrote to Mark. I have never be satisfied by any of the GIM's slut wife's apologizes to their faithful husbands for fucking their enemies,

co-workers, brothers, best friends, fathers, pets or whomever. I'd like to read the words used to get Mark to try to reconcile with her. It seems pretty simple in a story like this to spell it out. Where is it?

Not sure if a reconciliation is credible in this case or not, but GITM wrote an interesting series. Characters were well developed but not very likeable. Good series, though - very well written.

This was a very realistic story. A lot of men and women regret treating their spouses bad. I will always be a BTB person, but it is good to read a story that has a realistic nature.

@girlinthemoon keep on writing stories like this. ;)

...

Thanks for the story.

You're a good writer. Story moves along well. Characters believable. Good story ideas. Keep it up. I look forward to reading more of your writing.

Very believable! And for all those readers who will say that mark should not have taken her back, I feel sorry for you!

I honestly think you're one of the best writers on here, I love everything you write but this one in particular! I'm rooting for Lucy and Mark!

Xx

Really terrific story. I pounded through all the chapters in one sitting. Next level writing. The characters come alive as I read this. Engaging storyline. The dialogue is crazy-real. 5 stars are too few. This is the sort of story that brings me to LW. Thanks.

is not a theme I expect in LW, but excellent job of using it.

(though pony tails are not my favorite hair style, I must say).

And... the episodic nature of posting in chapters was excellently used to make the earlier degradation of Lucy fall into the back of my mind.

Most of the denizens here think he shouldn't have taken her back - I think she shouldn't have taken him back. He was the one who led her into what she became - divorced from him, she found pure roots. She needs to forgive, to redeem him... not the other way around.

But, the author I expect knew this... and I'm commenting on other comments again.

Bad, bad,

Green-something

(of course, worth the 5 for the expansion of the genre if nothing else)

That says it all. It takes talent to write like this.

Definitely a 5 star story. Excellent character development. Nice to get away from the saint husband who is manipulated by his demon wife. All characters were extremely realistic. A few points of realism that I feel more authors should take note of:

1. She was not demonized and shunned by her parents. In real situations, parents are going to make sure that their child is okay. They aren't going to throw their daughter to the wolves because she cheated, no matter how much they love the son in law.

2. She mourned for a while, and then tried to pick her life back up. I know guys would love to have her pining the rest of her life away and spending it feebly trying to win her husband back, but that doesn't happen. People's lives move on eventually. They may mourn for a while, but life does go on, even for those who made a mistake.

3. She was not depicted as an evil person. Sure she was selfish, but people have flaws. Their flaws don't make them evil.

4. He was not the perfect husband. They didn't have the perfect life.

5. She was not just a selfish wife who needed more dick. She was genuinely unhappy, and had good reason to be so. She made a bad choice because of her selfishness, but he made many bad choices in the marriage also.

6. there was no good guy or bad guy. Most of the time the husband is Christ incarnate and the wife is Judas, or the husband is like Ike Turner and the wife is a mousy, submissive woman who finally liberates herself. This story was about two flawed people who married for the wrong reasons.

I hope to see more stories like this one.

thank you for another lovely story.

i hope you won't ever stop (smile).

as so many other readers have already said. The quality of your stories, the realistic and believable way your characters talk and act, the pain and complexity of their feelings--all of these things are just miles above the run-of-the-mill quality of a lot of what appears on Lit.

In this story, I found that I didn't even care that much how it ended--whether she and Mark would try again, or whether she'd send him away and cling to her new-found happiness in her home town. It was enough just to read about her life and feelings, and let you take me to whatever ending you thought was right.

Thanks for another wonderful story--

Cordially, ohio

Great story. I usually find it hard to like a story where either partner breaks the marriage vows. However, we are all human , make mistakes and where there is true contrition.. everyone deserves a second chance. You will never keep everyone happy. There are people out there who feel that once a woman makes a mistake she should be made suffer for eternity. If we made people suffer eternally for mistakes, we would have no friends.

It was poignant and unpredictable at times but the twists really synced with the characters.

Ignore the haters as likely they don't fault American men or spew misandry when they read about cheating husbands/boyfriends or male rapists in nonconsent stories. It's telling how no to little outcry rape stories and cheating husband/boyfriend stories get but a cheating woman brings out misogynistic trolls.rriage.

For quite a while, I was really wondering what you were going to do with this, but reading this final installation, I understand. I originally began to read this as the idea of cheating was a bit of a turn on for me, although I'd be disgusted with myself if I ever did it (so I only like stories about it). Then, I started getting very annoyed with Luke (I actually have an ex by the same name, and things didn't end well there either). To be quite honest, I like the ending you gave it better than any ending that would have maybe even involved Luke. The both broke out of high class society, and it seems like they're starting again. And to me, that is probably the most beautiful ending I can possibly imagine.

You are a great writer. I really enjoyed your story.

First off definitely 5 stars. I loved the blinking hotel light thought....a beacon leading her to shore. Light she was adrift in a storm and was coming back to her home port. I'm just not sure that Mark being her home port is such a great thing for Lucy.

I think everyone should have a true love like John and Shari have. Too few of us do. It looks like Randy and Claudine have found that but I'm not so convinced about Lucy and Mark. Cause I have the opposite take on them than most commenters have. I don't think Lucy should take Mark back. She's way happier without him than she ever was with him and undoubtedly would find someone who would love her for who she is, and not be embarrassed by her at parties. Going from a blueblood wife to having a florist gig and a future career was a huge step up for her (yep I went there).

Even if he is really serious about counseling it's going to take a lot of therapy for him to change. Lucy is the best thing that ever happened in his otherwise bland life and he never came close to appreciating her (cept as a place to put his dick) until she was gone. I think he was more upset by the humiliation of her affair being with a colleague than he was hurt by her and if they reconcile he'll always hold it over her and punish her for it.

I admit, haven't read the other chapters but this one is superb. Heartfelt, realistic characters, good pacing. Just great. Thanks for your writing.

Good writing for the most part. Interesting reading. They're making a mistake (especially her) if they get back together. He will burn her. He will cut her down. He won't forget and won't trust her. Even after seven or eight years, they're from different Worlds. Fugedaboudit! Ciao!

You'll never please the morons who see the world in black and white and who see vengeance as the only possible response to frailty. Ignore them.

A sad but realistic tale, beautifully written, superbly paced.

Thank you.

In real life people make mistakes followed by decisions based on emotions and some rationales. (Taught decision making and research, some based on closed head injuries to areas of the brain responsible for emotion show that emotion is needed to make decisions that are not life threatening. Will not know danger. Too long to go into greater detail) In real life only 35% of marriages that deal with the infidelity issue end in divorce. The souses find a way to stay together and the majority wind up with marriages that are happier and stronger than the non infidelity marriages. I appreciate your strong plot lines, intense character development and righteous denouement. Most of the lack wits who write such scathing comments are living in a fantasy reality. I hope their spouses never leave the fantasy world. Their understanding of the human psyche is so limited I question their humanity. And for a culture imbued with Christian ideals they forget the words and behavior of Yeshua ( Jesus for those who only speak modern language although the former is his actual name.) Remember the ones he condemned were the moneylenders and the rule makers in their religiosity. Anticipating highly your next endeavor. And please do not let the comments of the rigid and unwise stop you from creating the beauty of your next story.

You are so right man ,many here seem to forget we are all human,humans make mistakes,i suspect many of these anons here are in fact the contrary of what they want us to believe,the live in a fantasyworld where they are the only master after god where in reality the face the same problems we all have when cheated upon : the grieve,the why,the financial side ,love and mistrust ,in the end i suspect many will consider reconciliation if at all possible

Were you swept up in the story? Did you believe the characters were real? Did you care what happened? The answer to these three questions is Yes. So it was great writing. Forget your stupid carping and think about it.

I read it a year ago. I enjoyed it even more the second time around. I agree with Ohio. It was just such a pleasure to get to learn about these characters that I found myself indifferent to their reconciliation.

LSD doesn't believe it's realistic that Mark could ever take Lucy back. But Mark's transformation from old money rich to whatever he's becoming is incomplete. Who knows what he would accept in his current state of mind. The whole reconciliation could be another tragic mistake, but I don't think it's out of character for either of them. Weird, but not out of character.

Just outstanding writing. Two women writers I wish I could emulate, but with a man's POV and voice--you and angiquesophie. I'm in awe of the way you two put words together.

Having a story from the woman's point of view is different and very interesting. The characters were very unique and fragile. Marriage and relationships were certainly the author's focus and it was enlightening. Lucy was a strange duck for that matter Mark was out there as well. The author brought issues to light that definitely inspired intense thinking on my part. Thank you for the five stars effort!

An absolutely wonderful and well-written story. 5 stars X 4 "All that glitters is not gold." ???

Fantastic story. One of my favorites.

Luke had been a good guy, and loved her back. But he wasn't, and he didn't. So they are starting over, and I have no presumptions where they will end. Happily ever after, with a bunch of kids, or Luke showing up one day and sweeping her back into suicidal infidelity. But the story works well, and drama, romance, and intrigue. Sure, lots of plot fails due to charters an personalities changing and morphing to fit the plot. But still a well told and interesting story.

Thank You for you time and talent.

This is the first but not the last I will read of yours.

I think I fell in love with Lucy despite her fall. If ever an affair was a good thing, this was. It was the catalyst to them finding themselves as individuals and as a couple. Well done!

You haven't submitted for a few years, hope you can renew.

And they learned & lived together, happily ever after.

A marriage without a family, a relationship without emotions, are generally short lived.

I'm glad that they flung aside the 'blanket' of a false life & found their True Selves & hopefully True Love.

Thanks for sharing this wonderful tale, pleasing both, the brain & the heart.

It deserves nothing less than 5.

This was a very strange and delightful story......my, my, Mr. Author you got some talent....

bill........5sssssssssssss

No words to express my delight. Thanks for a wonderful story.

really thanks. this was great.

your the best writer in the place.

@LSD -

But that offensive fuck in the stairwell is going to be what eventually saves Mark... and Lucy, for that matter.

Green-something

(I do wish I would stop posting to no purpose...)

Really well written. Reminds me of Tough Guys Don't Dance. Brilliantly written but with absolutely no believable or likable characters. Hated every one of the main protagonists. No way would a husband take her back and no way would her road to Damascus moment have occurred so quickly, Apart from that.. enjoyed.

"Today, in the West, most of us are going to have two or three relationships or marriages. And some of us are going to do it with the same person. Your first marriage is over. Would you like to create a second one, together?"

A gut wrenching but compelling story. I wonder if it was as difficult to write as it was for some of us to read. Congratulations.

I will stay with my first response. OH FUCK YEAH. You go homegirl! Oldbearswitch

Won me over the second time all the way through!

A lot of information is gleaned and hinted at but not too directly stated.

Ended up really liking this! 5*

Admittedly, I am lways either amused, incensed, or befuddled by lsd's comments. His reference to Di leaves me the latter. If he has an abiding affection fot di as an epitome of beauty and virtue I can assure him he has no objectivity. If his is a comparision of Lucy and di and their decisions, I for one am certain that Lucy is the superior human being. The chuck and di relationship was an insipid fraud and an insulting public farce. Lucy married becauseof a pregnancy and stayed true for eight years. Di married for greed and then came to terms with chuck and cammi by seeking out other men. Does anyone seriously believe Harry is charley's progeny Di then prostitued herself with another older not that attractive but seriously rich male. Choosing that partner to intentionally snub the crown. Too me her intentionl snub was her greatest act.

Lucy marries a weslthy guy because of a pregnacy, the baby is lost but they forge ahead, she begins to hate the person she has become, strongly suspects Mark of cheating at a time when he was seriously considering leaving her for her ''bff''. She wants out of life she is living, makes horrific decision with Luke and intentionally humansiliates Mark.

However having been caught but not yet exposed she regrets choice. She returns to her home and begins to build on who she was prior to Mark.

She demonstrated great remorse, was the epitome of contrite. She endured what she believe was Mark's well desrved wrath.

In the end they both grew up, made the choice to become the person each always wanted to be, finally opened up to each other and chose to move forward together.

Lucy was for a long time a contemptuous and contemptible person. Mark was not without faults.

They chose to learn to forgive and to love.

Lsd is within his rights to chose a necrophilias relationship with di.

I would drop to my knees and Thank God I had Lucy

I can't say enough how much I enjoyed this. Good thing I was off from work today. I don't think I would have gotten anything done if I were on the clock.

I recall lsd praising the gaseous works of singerjoe and espousing open marriages. I have read a number of comments wherin lsd heaped praise upon himself as the most gifted of Literotica analysts claiming, and rightly so, that a number of lesser authors have sought out and praised his insights and critiques.

In his ending sentence, he not only uses sophomoric toilet phrasing to insult numerorous readers but also the observations and praise of a number of this sites more accomplished writers.

Once and for all with the greatest finality, lsd has publicly and perfectly proven his FLATULENT observations are vile sewer gases and should be avoided at all costs in the same manner that intellectual society distances itself from those with pathological necrophiliac desires

I respect your view, though during my numerous REFLECTIVE reads of this story I have yet to find evidence supporting your claim that he led her ''astray''

Girlinthemoon is one of the most talented writers around, and in the top five for women;. two are better, in my opinion. That being said, she sometimes writes the nastiest and most evil bitches on the net. I don't read or enjoy those stories.

But, LSD. What can be said? No good writer wants his comments. Anyone who sings the praises of literary midgets, such as RichardGerald, the nearly illiterate Matt Moreau, the mindless inanity of Xleglover, etc, is obviously delusional. The worst of his delusions is that he is witty and urbane. His comments, if he praises an author, are an embarrassment to them, when his gibberish can be understood. If he disses them, it is a badge of honor. Of course, hack writers such as Swingerjoe and Javmore79 revel in his nose up their posterior, but I notice that at least two of the most talented and fresh authors to ever grace the site, now turn on the exhaust fans and delete his comments as soon as their disgusting stench befouls the atmosphere.

So much criticism, even reaching back over two years to smite LordSD's very first comment on this story. And then adding RG, MM, SJ and Javmor to your list as well.

Are you sure you haven't missed anybody?

Lue

I will let ''mouse'' defend herself/himself

Admittedly I am more than mesmerized by this story.

Seems a number of Literotica's elite authors share that view.

Besides re-reading stories such as this one numerous times, I feel compelled to read and analyze all the comments.

Considering lsd's comment was the very first posted for this transformational story, and considering the content of that comment, I know what my reaction was...shocked does not quite cover it.

As to the ''mouse's'' analysis of lsd and overlooking once on a rant he/she mentioned a few authors, I believe the ''mouse's'' ROAR was justified7

√&√

I put off reading this and for the life of me I don't know why.

This was a tender love story. I loved it.

Somehow I knew Luke was either bisexual and making it with David or he was just a turd.

The further in I got after the discovery the more frightened I was Mark and Lucy might not reconcile. Your closing, Mark's comment about how he felt he sullied her, his early coolness, her sense of inferiority and uncertainty about Marks true feelings were so well developed, at least to me. Your closing, "He reached out to us."

God every chapter should be way over 4.5. Who are these voters?

Thank you so much!

Jedd Clampett

I need to reflect on what I think of both Mark and Lucy and their mental states. Probably, Lucy was depressed, felt like Mark did not lover her, and overcompensated with an attitude of superiority to her husband and his associates. Mark, I believe started out as resentful and for some reason could not express his love for Lucy. When she pleaded with him to tell her he loved her before he knew of her betrayal why couldn't he answer her. The one thing I did find unrealistic was the partners treatment of each other and their spouses. When Mark's partner tired to get Lucy to blow him and Mark said he did that all the time. Also, Patricia assumed that Lucy would sex all Mark's partners and that was just routine for partners to treat each other that way it seemed farcical to me. Do people really behave like that? Is the author out of touch or am I? 5*

anon.1

I really liked this story. Neither side was perfect, o.k. Lucy instigated the start but without that no story, but they were fairly human and reacted that way. The ending I liked in that it showed it´s never too late if the urge is honest. 4 star

Well done, really enjoyed your story. You are an excellent writer.

This whole series is very well written. the story line is very realistic and

a believable ending.

Loved the mixture of craft, non-con mixed with power play that all.felt believable. I love that work and time not just empty acceptance went into reconciliation (or hope of it) still disheartened to see so much misogyny in the comments. I hope it won't keep you from.sharing more great writing!

Thanks

First and foremost, this author in this story eliminates any doubt that she is above and beyond ALL OTHER AUTHORS contributing to this site.

That having been emphatically stated, I can understand luedon's reaction in one respect. The ''mouse'' insulted her spouse -javmor79. At least that was his claim in intro to one of his stories.

However, my inference is she also defended lsd and his insulting comment. While the dawg has the right to comment, he sullies TheGirlInTheMoon's writing with his posting of any comment.

Furthermore, this author chose to use word Girl in her name and luedon's refusal to acknowledge another woman's CHOICE demonstrates lue's hypocricy!

I was swept along by the story. All the different emotions registered as real.

And the love scenes were HOT. Congratulations!

One of the first stories that I have had to re-read immediately. So true, touching and believable.

As a man, I love these stories written from a woman's point of view. I'm also intrigued by the feel of a bit of gothic horror in a lot of GirlInTheMoon's stories.

No problem with the reconciliation but it really needed to have been a longer process to get to where they hopefully ended. Yes the stairwell incident would have been hard to swallow for anyone.......if you know what I mean....

Plz keep writing you're amazing

Smitten is just what I am now. This story drew me in effortlessly and inexorably. Your characters come to life quickly- I cared very much about Lucy from the first page. What a storyteller you are! This is one of the finest short stories I've read.

Wow... I have to confess... I read the first chapter... then skipped ahead to the last because I didn't like where the story was going... and lucy was irritating me... but after reading some of the last chapter... I was forced to go back and read the others...

I am extremely glad that I did... I've rarely seen a character brought to life as was done to lucy... it was impossible not to be drawn into her suffering and self recrimination... im a sucker for true remorse... and she did... in spades... she was a prime example of... sometimes good people do bad things...

this was just excellent...

-jaye-

I remember reading this when it first came out and enjoyed it. Then when we went through the two Legends Days I checked it out and read it again, and liked it even more. But behold, the story crossed my "randoms" list today and I was surprised at the low scores. I decided to leave a comment, and wow I saw I never voted, not either time. So I voted fives for all the parts to today. This story is a gem.

Thanks again and and again and again...

Jedd Clampett

Reading his comment I checked scores on this series. All well above 4 but deserving of as close to 5 as we admirers can make it.

Seems I am allowed to vote again and I am!!!!!

I do think that both RAAC and BYB are extremes. Every story has the possibility of a reasonable, most likely ending. If we look hard at what the author has provided, then at what we could expect the average person to do in that scenario, a most plausible ending should be evident.

In this case, I cannot buy a reconciliation. Her actions were too heinous and the betrayal too humiliating. It would take a super human personality to absorb it and then be able to let it go. More likely, the deep seated negative feelings in Mark could be suppressed for a time but over the years they would resurface and corrode the relationship. Lucy on the other hand, would welcome Mark's forgiveness as balm to her deeply shattered self image of what she became and the pain she rendered to someone she claims to love.

Over time however Lucy, being the selfish person she is, would come to resent Mark's forgiveness as demeaning to her pride. As these traits become evident, Mark will begin to see the same "entitled" self centered Lucy reemerge. Nothing good can come of this reunion long term.

Best they depart as injured but wiser individuals and seek happiness with someone who doesn't carry the baggage that exists between them. Neither BYB or RAAC is appropriate.

...and the reconciliation takes three parragraphs, you know that the writer did something wrong. Too quick, too little done to repair the damage, very little growing on her part. She even sounds entitled in the end. You're obviously a woman and you write about males from your perspective and a good reader can tell. You got some little details wrong about male psychology. Devil is in the details. Sorry just trying to give you some construcitve input. You need some male beta readers to help you with that.

Good writing but RAAC. The end was rushed. I'm not against them being together. I'm against they being "rushed" together the way you did.

I'm not a fan of this chapter. I hated Lucy in the first two chapters, grew to admire her in the third, and couldn't believe when she went to Mark's room. She was doing fine on her own; maybe Mark has changed, maybe he hasn't. She's better off with a fresh start.