All Comments on 'A Touch of Grace'

Truly an Amazing Story..... thank You for sharing your Beautiful Story...... This Old Man cried along with them... Merry Christmas ....!!!!

Too many weird word choices, this for example: "I called you many times but you didn't receive", who says it like that? She didn't ANSWER.

Heart tugged.

Ignore anon. When people say, "I'm sorry I'm unable to receive your call at this moment," it is perfectly acceptable

Cutting onions again.

I'm totally useless for the rest of the afternoon.

Well done.

Had to read this three times to figure out that it was the same person referred to as her and as I:

..........had called her almost incessantly for the first three days since I left.............

It's better writing to pick one and stick with it in a sentence or paragraph.

Wow - such a powerful story. It perfectly described the pain suffered by many parents when losing a child, like when my wife and myself lost our daughter last year (7days old).

This is the first story on this site that has reduced me to tears.

Amazing history. I've been crying tears of blood as I read this story.

The name of Grace is linked to me in many ways, my son was born on the day Grace Kelly died, Amazing Grace is one of my favorite songs, Botticelli's Three Graces is one of my favorite paintings etc., etc., no I want to spread out too much.

I do not know if the author is a woman, but this story has a sentimental approach with a touch of woman in the narration.

5 * for you, since I can not give more.

I apologize for my English (yet), is not my native language.

A lovely story of heartbreak & love, can't recommend it highly enough

I'm just left utterly speechless after reading this. 5 stars and would give more if I could

I'm literally curled up in a ball crying my eyes out while the sound of the rain plays in the background. Ugh! I'm too old for this!

Thank you for writing such a beautiful story. It was so refreshing.

Grace gave me hope. I knew a girl like her when I was about 6. She was too ill to play with the other kids so I spent my recesses in the classroom with her so she wouldn't be alone. She ended up moving away and I heard she passed soon after. I still think about Heidi from time to time.

Again, great job! I can't wait to see what you do next.

make it past the first page. Proofread your story before posting. Read it aloud. If you can't find the character changes, etc. then, find someone to proofread for you. This might have been an enjoyable story. You certainly put enough work into it to write 13 pages. Don't go to so much work, just to turn your readers off before they have a chance to find out if you can write or not.

Do a rewrite and resubmit. I'll give it another try, if you do.

I will not rate this, because if I did, I'd have to downgrade it, and I don't like to do that to another writer. I will also not sign this because I don't want to be one-bombed for being honest. Please take this in the spirit intended and learn.

LoneGirl, you are great. There's nothing wrong with your writing. You're one of the few writers on this site sharing meaningful stories. Ignore those who leave negative comments. They are only jealous of your talent.

What a great story.

Lovely people and like real life. You dont get a happy end every time.

👍🏻

It's a terrific story, LoneGirl. I loved every paragraph of it. These stories are why I like this website. Well done, well done! 5 stars!!.. Dave

This story broke my heart. Your talent is so god that I am not sure if I can read another story for awhile. I was so moved by grace.

Thank you from an old man.

I usually love your stories, but this didn't seem up to your usually good standards, poor editing, missing words, but even with the missing words it was far too wordy, you also don't get off a car, you get out of one. Scenes seem out of whack, one minute where in one scene then it’s something else entirely. Page 5 her brother and wife are having people over, she’s sent a text saying making lasagne first time, yet she’s ill. The Claire, sitting stalking her ex while getting drunk presumably in her brother’s house, yet she answers the door to her SIL? Sorry, stopped there, please proof read or get someone to do it for you.

Re: Ignore the naysayers

They’re only stating the obvious. Like I’ve said, you’re usually much better than this.

So heartfelt, thank you for this sad tale that is true for some folk!!

I agree with the 'get out of the car' bit, but the rest...

The house belongs to her brother, and her SIL happens to be the brother's wife. So they live in the same house, right?

And she could always go home and cook because she was just having some cramps, not dying. You cannot just lie in bed when you have guests coming for dinner, can you?

About the story being too wordy, I'm sorry, can't help it. It combines several chapters into one, so it will be wordy. If you don't like it, don't read it.

BTW, 'get off a car' isn't completely wrong either.

i just would have liked a happy ending.

This was a story with an inevitable ending and only the journey to that end was in question. Claire's involvement was also predictable, but the way they got there had me somewhat disappointed. Bryan should have brought Claire into his world more decisively as he saw the attraction between Grace and Claire grow. It shows his fallibility - not a hero without flaws. Claire was also flawed. She could have told Bryan that she loved him and let him react to that. If he was repelled then she was well rid of him. He probably would have given in to his emotions and they would have suffered through the final tragedy together. But this was indeed a story of real people; flawed as we all are. The commenter who wished for a happy ending doesn't realize that this was the only happy ending that could be. An unrealistic wish for a child's heart to transplant into Grace wasn't going to happen in this world. A new child with the name of Grace is a blessing and a new union between loving people who could very well have children of their own is a happy ending indeed. They could certainly not have a daughter and named her Grace themselves so it makes sense for Peter and Pauline to have the Grace name to perpetuate. It is a little surprising that they would want to name their child for the lost one, but that does make a little sense. All in all the progression of the story from the start to finish was a slow move to a light in the middle of these people's lives and sometimes you have to take 13 pages to get there. Certainly worthy of 5* in my book and I leave this story sad, yet satisfied with my use of this time.

It is your story, your characters......Keep write what you love

And still cried like a baby. You write beautifully. Wish I could rate it more than 5 stars.

Should have a warning at the beginning to not read this in public! I'm an emotional wreck now :)

Knew what was coming and still... tears. Well written. Realistic reactions from all. Of course father consumed with grief for a couple weeks. Any other reaction for a person who loved his daughter like that was not going to seem real. Bravo bravo. Family interaction superb. Well done. I am rambling and going to wash my tears away now. Thanks for 5* story.

This is one of the most tender, caring, loving stories I have read in a long time. We should all take our lead from Grace's positive attitude towards life, despite all of the physical limitations with which she dealt. Every day is not perfect, but it can be much closer to that if we focus on the positive things in our lives.

Also, this story gives new meaning to the concept of saying Grace before meals. We should ensure that we really mean it!

You write wonderful stories. Yes I really choked up reading this one. Wish I could give it more than 5 stars. Thank you.

Moving.

I've been through that, the surgery, the hope, the funeral.

Though I didn't get the girl !

Very very well written.

Now I'm going to play Sarah Mclachlan 'full of grace' that's been going through my head while reading this.

And get another box of tissues.

Like a few others I saw the end coming and I cried. Such a sad a beautifully woven story and definitely 5 stars. I wish it wouldn't have had to end that way for Bryan but I saw it coming. Terrific story.

What a wonderful story. I fell in love with that little angel. And I hope Grace is resting in peace and her family finds closure..

Well written. Very sad, and yet......

Thanks for sharing.

Just amazing!! I was bawling by that last chapter, and it ended beautifully.

Thank you for this

Beautiful and very moving. Thank you

Lone Girl,

There is some sadness in your writing; people don't write like you do who have not been there. But it's your life experiences brought to life in this and other stories that give your writing impact, compassion.

The little girl in your story is aptly named; she brings love to all she touches, at least until she passes, and even then her memory does the same.

I would like to remind you of what the word "grace" means. Biblical terminology in Hebrew (Old Testament) and Greek (New Testament) connotes unmerited favor. In other words, love, acceptance, affirmation, forgiveness, etc., all without being earned. It is THE theme of Christianity and Judaism. One of my own daughters is named "Graziella", or gracious-one. And she is.

I think your little grace would have forgiven those that had done her wrong or betrayed her. I hope you, Lone Girl, will be able to do the same in your real/personal life. Not forgiving someone, no matter how awful they have been to you, is like living in a prison, and I don't want that for you --- your writing speaks of a beautiful, loving human being behind your words.

Merry Christmas from the other side of the pond.

Your friend and fan,

Christopher

All your stories are about broken people, and no one portrays pain and anguish the way you do. I sense a broken heart behind those words, because pain is sometimes more inspiring than happiness. Like the commenter before me said, I think you're indeed a beautiful human being. Looking forward to more from you.

This was a fabulous story. One of the best I've ever read. Thank you

An absolute treat to read. Will be checking out your other stories.

A great story. Sad for the loss of Grace, but a true and endearing romance.

This happens to be one of my favorite stories, if I can remove the dust from this room, which is causing a serious allergy in my eyes ...

5 * for you.

I apologize for my English (yet), is not my native language.

You made a 50 plus year old former drill Sargent cry. 5 stars.

Thankyou its beautiful

Pass the Kleenex please.. 5 stars

After reading this amazing story I have used two boxes.

Thank you.........

Poignant...touching...awesome...a favorite!

The moment Claire decided to name her niece as Grace. I knew that I'm going to cry. Such a beautiful story. Thank you for writing.

I have never read such a beautiful , touching, real-life story in my whole life... God, I almost cried.... You ought to publish this.... Hats off to the author..... Keep going

I'm guessing it's a true story or at least true for a lot of parents. There a lot of Claire's in the world, but hard to find sometimes. There are even less Bryans around, I am one but no one ever noticed. Good friend zone is all I get. That's ok. I loved this story and I love LoneGirl too.

these kinds of stories allways brings me back to feeling completly despretate to whanting to burn the world down i proberly should not have read it but it was such a great story

Your story is magnificent. I am a kidney transplant recipient of over 33 years and this story hit very close to home. Just a few months ago my wife and I attended a funeral of a 10 year old boy who died while waiting on the transplant list. The pain and emotions you brought forward were so realistic and authentic. It brought me to tears more than once. If I could give you more than 5 stars, I would. Excellent read!

I'll say this: If you don't get a tear or two in your eye while reading this story, you are not freakin' human. One of the best I've read in a while and thank you LoneGirl for it.

Everyone should give this story 5 stars. I certainly did.

That this wonderful; story won a prize, fully deserved.

I loved this story, you did an excellent job crafting a detailed beautiful tale. I just wish it carried on for just a bit longer. But that is what the readers imagination is for.

I'm lost for words, honestly this was a story I couldn't stop reading. And as said in another comment, I wish there was more, more moving forwards in the story and more in the middle. Now, with the story concluded I only wish there was more Grace, as you had me in happy tears at one point, and plenty of sad tears later on. Its been quite awhile since I've cried this much, and never have I had this much emotion from a story.

As a writer you've successfully made me feel for the characters, something I struggle to achieve on my own writing. I'm no genius though, but you are. I'll have to check to see what else you've written as well, in case I find another gem like this.

Thank you for the wonderful read.

~J

Ive read this a number of times, always leaves my face a little wet and eyes watery. wish I could score this 10*

Thanks for sharing

Thanks for posting. The only complaint I have is that you should have warned us early on that we'd need some tissues. Worthy of at least ten stars!

I have read many excellent stories on this site. This story doesn't even get close to "excellent." You are so far above excellent that I don't even know what to call it.

You nailed this one. Yes, it was a long story but it needed all of it. Your use of "off the car" and a few others like it were a very nice touch. There are many ways of saying the same thing depending on what country you learn in.

The emotions of love and pain were handled in a very loving way. Even the grieving reactions were spot on. This story should never have a sequel. You started with Grace and ended with Grace. Very well done.

I can't imagine that any author here or elsewhere could ever write such a good story. One thing I wondered about half way through was how many shares you own of the tissue companies. My family sends its love to you and yours for taking the time to write such a lovely story.

This story has me at a loss for words. Your story-telling was spot on, letting us fall in love with Grace, Claire and Bryan. The touching reality that not everything goes in life as we have planned. My wife and I have lost a daughter, I totally understood the numbness, walking only by putting one foot in front of the other, the tears, the gut-wrenching can't eat anything feeling. This story brought me to tears, many times. Life does go on, we never forget, bursting into tears even after many years. We lean on each other. I was so glad you brought Claire and Bryan back together to continue their relationship, he needed the love Claire had for him to help him thru.

Well written, thank you for this story.

Wonderful, beautiful, heartbreaking, uplifting...simply amazing!

There is a fierce and passionate protectiveness in the heart of all good men.

Once its targets were marauders, beasts, and other physical threats to the clan.

Nowadays a common thing that causes it to well up is insult or affront to his wife.

You captured its essence perfectly on pg 9 when Bryan defended her ambition level.

I could feel his ire rising as he sprung to here defense. Well played LoneGirl !!!

Nice passionate and I would suggest write more. It was heart felt. I could not stop reading till I finished. Great writing.

I started crying when grace got hospitalized. Heck i'm still crying. I loved this story

What an emotional roller coaster!

So of course I'm going to criticize. But before I do let me say, at no time was it hard to give you 5 stars. This story was brilliant! Perfectly executed and masterfully crafted. Did I cry as so many others did? No. I did not. But only because I am a lying bastard.

I know I am posting this two years after the fact so please forgive me if you've already addressed this. I did spot a few type O's and some juxtaposed words and there were a couple of instances that stood out to me as odd.

When Pauline had the cramps suddenly it read, to me anyway, as if they both already knew she was pregnant. I didn't think much of it. I just assumed you had missed mentioning it before. Then later when her pregnancy was a surprise it took me back a bit.

That night, when Pauline came home there were several things that stuck out as odd. It read as if Claire, after downing over a half a bottle of JD let her in found out she was pregnant and then her brother came in. Drunk Claire, who just drunk dialed her ex, decided to take Pauline's car and drive away. I say Pauline's because I got the impression Claire didn't have a car. Then Bryan shows up and offers to drive her home. But he doesn't have a car? How did he know she did?

So, I do agree you should grab a trusted someone to act as a reader. Preferably someone who can actually sit in the room with you. Some one you respect. That being said, I didn't see ANYTHING that stole from the beauty of this story. If I had paid money for it, I -still- would be elated and recommending it to people.

I am looking forward to reading the rest of your work.

Thank you for this magnificent story.

omg! i am still crying and sobbing thinking about the pain they faced! i would feel so happy if grace had heart donor and she gets fine because she is the one who helped claire from getting out of her misery! u just can believe i've been crying since she was hospitalised and got serious! i have shut the lappy doom twice to make a break out of tears! soooo heart touching i can't just explain my feeling! awesome moral story!

I cannot honestly comment on your story. It was too long to justify my reading it. KISS, Keep It Short Sister

I loved reading this wonderful piece. I had to hold back tears....very emotional.

It was a very story that one could relate to and I felt connected.

Thank you ...to a gifted writer.

Indra

How could you do this. It was devastating. I'm not crying. It's just really hot and my eyes are sweating.

One of the best stories I've read. The strength of a child is miraculous. Known many that have left this world too early. You've captured the spirit of these brave little people. Well done.... 10

Great story but holy hell do I look a mess on this bus!! X

Five star story with good characters. You wrote well enough for a reader to care about you characters. The sister-in-law provided a perfect touch- enough of a comedic relief to keep it from being too dark, and a reminder that life continues. Her giving birth after Grace' death added a thematic undercurrent much like that in the song "Lightning Crashes" by the band Live.

A minor nit to pick as a medical type- Grace's condition is actually quite treatable- Kawahima procedure and others have been found to result in 5-year survival rates in the vicinity of 90%. That is quite a bit better than a lot of cancers. Just a minor detail no one except a pro would notice, though.

This story is tender, loving and yet sad. You amazingly portray the power of Grace's love on those around her. Claire and Bryan are written so well. Their relationship is so much more than many stories. They take the time to get to know each other while falling in love. Grace's love and outlook on life gave hope to those around her. She accomplished more in her short life than most people in a lifetime. Excellent!

God it fucking made me cry.Damn it was one of the greatest stories I have ever read here. Kuddos man keep it up.

I had to stop reading several times to calm down, plus the salt in my tears was too much to handle. As a dad who has spent too many nights sitting beside my eldest daughter's hospital bed in or out of the ICU, watching her heart rate vary from 160 up as high as 220 (during asthma attacks), this really hits close to home. I am blessed because my daughter survived and rarely suffers from serious asthma now at age 25. Personally, had my daughter died I would have been shocked and offended if someone I knew wanted to name another baby by her name. I would never have been comfortable with that, I would have felt that her identity and her memory was being taken, or disrespected. On the other hand, if it was a generation later, it would feel wonderful - for instance if my youngest daughter named her child with her name.

Are you from the British Isles, or maybe Europe? I noticed plenty of word usage and idioms that I have only heard from my British friends and colleagues. No need to hide it or avoid it, because it's part of your literary voice and style. And there's no need to set your stories in the US just to please your audience!

I have a strong impression you have faced trauma and/or despair in your life. You portray these feelings very intensely, and they seem so true-to-life that I can't believe they aren't based in experience. And yet, your story is so uplifting!

Stars, I'm crying like a child. This was truly beautiful. You have a gift that is rare and entrancing. In a few sentences you had me involved in the story and truly caring for each and every character. The way you portrayed everyone was real and the reactions were raw and emotional. I rarely cry and this got to me so intensely. It's so hard to overcome loss especially the loss of a child. No parent should ever have to outlive their child. Ever. The build up of Bryan and Claire's relationship made sense and was paced so that it never felt too soon or too slow. It was all very natural. Thank you. I really do hope you endeavor to pursue writing such poignant stories and share this talent with more of the world.

""Daddy thinks I'm going to leave him," she said softly, as if sharing a secret with her. "Will you tell him that I'll never leave him?"

Well, that as a kick in the feels.

Thanks for taking us on this emotional rollercoaster.

Never have I cried so much, it was really a great story, I hope you keep writing.

The only thing that bothered me was Claire's continual reverting to her breakup. Other than that this is a great story and a real page turner. I also cried.

Boy, what a story. Well written and kept me engrossed until the end. I saw the ending coming But I was hoping that you would save Gracie at the end and that would be the twist. Thank you for a beautiful...but very sad story.

Had to be hard, as a writer, to let Grace die rather than reach for the happy ending. You made it work. Good job.

I'm only at the part where she's done looking at the house and is being driven to meet Bryan by her sister in law. I'm really excited by this story. It's very comforting, very soothing. I'm curled up on the couch, christmas tree lights shining gently from the corner of the room, our dogs asleep close by. I'm reading this and waiting for my hubby to come home from work. I feel happy and warm. It's such a balm for the soul, reading a sweet romance story like this. Thank you, writer. Thank you for making it possible for me to spend time relaxing with this story.

In this story when the characters went christmas shopping they talked about shopping for themselves. It struck me as strange. I can understand treating a sick child to a toy shopping spree when it is not known which day is her last, but do adults go shopping for themselves because it's christmas? Is that a regular thing in the US? I'm from Finland and here when we do christmas shopping we shop for christmas foods, christmas decorations and the gifts we intend to give to others. Is it a part of the american christmas culture or shopping culture to also go shopping stuff for oneself in the weeks leading up to christmas?

Sad. But lovely. I love the way you wrote them falling in love.

Bryan said, I don't think you have any children to Claire then added I hope you don't.

That was a mean spirited thing to say and certainly out of character for him. She was after all 27 years old not 17 or there abouts. I've mistaken sugar for salt but cinnamon for coriander!?

What a tear jerker. Just love the story and the characters were quite well written.

Totally sappy and yet a great story that reaches out and grabs you.

why did you have to kill her...

ugh thats such a love/hate relationship writers killing innocent little kids... so full of love and all...

but thats what makes the story great i guess.....I still dont like it and at the same time love it...

I hated the fact you let Grace die, plus you left the ending unfinished.

Taussigs has a low mortality rate these days. Having Grace live was more than realistic. You ought to have put a fricken warning.

Letting Grace die killed the story.

What happened after lost any meaning.

I have read many stories of love and death in my 60+ years but this one had me in tears and yet it was almost like Grace was watching over them. You have a great talent thank you for sharing with us.

Told with grace, about Grace.

To the haters, grow up. Not everything is a Hallmark movie, life has lots of pain. Broaden your horizons, read some Greek tragedies. Tragedy makes you feel in a way a happy ending won't.

knew where this was going but read it all. lost a niece at 5&1/2 yrs old with gbh they didnt have a name back then. at 77 + yrs old brought rain in the house.

Thank you for a beautiful, poignant story.

Beautiful sad story and semi happy ending. guessing the end brought a few tears but the coming together of two people with real love was beautiful also, Haven't heard from the author since '19 hope she is happy and well in her new country.

every time i read about Grace there are showers in the house. between my late wife we lost 5 . the pain was still great even though they were micarries.

The degree of differentiation of forms, shapes, colours and shades of love, sympathy and affection in a- well, yes, sort of short story- is astonishing. The array of feelings, emotions , sentiments and character traits is also above average. The language is unpretentious. The world is not painted in black and white, like in "women are all noble creatures and man are pigs". You won't find blatantly displayed axioms of political correctness, with the exception of the statement that all children, regardless of their talents and abilities, deserve the best from their parents and from the society as a whole, to which I wholeheartedly agree.

In other words, there is next to no content that could rub against anybody's grain and there is next to non fancy- shmancy stuff, hyped today and shunned or forgotten tomorrow. Thus It impacts and moves readers now and will continue to to so in the future.

In other words: a tear jerker of the better kind.

Can't describe the feeling after reading the story. From start to finish I just can't stop reading it. Definitely a 5 star ✨🌟✨🌟✨🌟✨🌟✨🌟 ratings. Thank you very much for your story.

Ali Singapore

WTF…NO No No how could you. Why turn this beautiful story into a fucking Shakespearean tragedy. You had me in tears the whole last chapter….I was hoping against hope Grace would get a heart at the last moment and that Clair would be her new mum. I hate you. still I gave you ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I haven't cried over many stories here. But take my tears. It was a beautiful story.

I can't see the screen. It's all blurry. NO I'M NOT FREAKING CRYING!! I got something in my eye. Both of them. Devastating. Brilliant. You left out Clair saying "You know she'll never leave you. She's still here" putting her hand over his heart "she asked me to tell you that she wasn't going to leave you."

Wow crying my heart out, lovely story

Beautiful story. It hit me right in the feels! Thank you for sharing