All Comments on 'Across the Tracks Ch. 03'

This sucks to be honest. It reads like a romance novel I'd buy on the shelf, something an old lady would read. There is no reality to the story at all. Why would she call a stranger for help? Exactly. No reason. If you're going to be this fantasy like, you may as well throw in a dragon or two and post in Sci-Fi.

Considering it is supposed to be a slow moving romance, and it is fiction, and it is supposed to kind of be a love at first sight thing, I'll take all that as a compliment. And my next story is the Fantasy one by the way, thought I'd throw a shameless plug out there, look for Shadows of the Axe and Darkness of the Sword coming on here sometime around November.

Wimps with no names should piss off. If you don't like the story don't read it. It's probably above your reading level to begin with. BigCorey your story reads fine, I am enjoying it very much. Please disregard these no name assholes and by all means continue with the story. Thanks for writing.

To continue whether anyone liked it or not lol. I was going to finish this even if it took me months to get everything good enough for it to be approved. Which matter of fact it did. This is a labor of love, and as such I will nurture it to it's completion.

I like the story, but you really need to proof read your work. Too many grammatical and spelling errors. Knight is spelled with a "k" when referring to a Knight In Shining Armor. I realize you are trying to do a good job so maybe someone to edit your work might be in order.

I am liking it so far,very good even tho there is a few spelling errors

I come on and find another chapter today! I am really loving this story. Cant wait to see what happens next!

A HELLS ANGEL , SHIT SHE FOUND THE PERFECT KNIGHT, AND I DO THINK THAT THERE IS MORE THAN JUST THE ASS BOYFRIEND TO DEAL WITH DOWN THE ROAD, LIKE THE PARENTS AND " THE MONIED" WHO ARE NOT GOING TO LIKE THIS , AND THE FIREWORKS SHOULD BE GREAT, GOOD JOB

It's not a Hell's Angel patch. There's no skull, this is just wings that are being burnt by fire.

Seriously, I don't know how I missed this story until Chapter 3.

but wear a patch as described and the angels will ask you to remove it, and not to nicely i might add, hope to see more of the story soon

I loves this story, I NEED more of this story. You need an editor and people need to stop being so rude. That's all there is too it. Otis is very yummy sounding. Can't wait for chp. 4!

Was submitted the 26th waiting for approval.

...why she was driving a junker when she came from money. Glad to see you explained that. I think your story is progressing fine and is very enjoyable.

I laughed when I read the anonymous comment putting it down. I say if you want to downtalk someones story at least have the balls to put your name on it. Having said that, an editor would be a good idea. Even the master Steven King has an editor. At first I didn't use an editor either until I figured out that I tend to read what I though I wrote rather than what was actually on the page when I did my proofreading. We authors are just too close to our own work to be objective, LOL.

Keep up the good work.

Yea, I have an editor now, mainly because she likes to read my stories and have 'jizzy mcfun times'. Her words, not mine. I'm going to drop a line to someone that offered on the site to edit, and see if they are still up for it.

I absolutely LOVE when people make comments about writers needing to edit their work or get an editor, and they can't even write two sentences without multiple grammatical and spelling errors. You don't have many and it doesn't detract from the story too much. I already read it through a few months ago, but I had to come back for more. I love Otis and Ariel. This is a modern day Romeo and Juliet. Keep up the great work.

P.S. I am literotica user RoxyGreen, but I'm on my phone and it won't let me log in. so I'm not quite as anonymous.

Have seen, had seen, not I seen it is I saw.