All Comments on 'Adonis Ch. 02'

Glad your back but I think I missed somethings like what happen to his mom?? Why is the step mom such a bitch???

This was one of my favorites. I'm glad your back.

So glad that you decided to continue with this one! Its so great to have you back and can't wait for more!

But was left a bit empty and confused. The story felt like it jumped a bit too much and I agree about the unanswered issues about his mom and step mom. Is it over? Or will there be more? I can't tell. Good core story over all...just needs a bit more work

this is one of my favorite stories and i'm glad you came back to finish it...i can't wait for the next chapter and i hope the wait is not as long this time! great job!

I was so surprised to see another chapter, having thought you had abandoned this story. My only criticism is that I thought the story seemed a bit rushed and some details were glossed over or briefly explained, but overall it was nice to meet these characters again.

First of all, I'd like to say that I enjoyed the story. It was interesting and reflected the bigotry in society to today. However, there were aspects of the story that I didn't enjoy.

I started reading from the first chapter today, and I think there wasn't enough elaboration to lead to the connection that Mark and Daphne share. It's like you made it easy for them, not like the process of getting-to-know-each-other that most couples have to do. Also, Mark's character seems a little hollow. What do I know about him overall? He has a horrible mother, loves Daphne and is protective of her. As a reader, I don't get much background on him that makes him special. But the way in which you write about him, makes him UNspecial. I can still remember him looking away from a BBW dancing on the bartop in chapter one with something akin to disgust. That narrow-mindedness of not being able to see beauty wherever it is makes his character ring as shallow and not worth my time reading about. Granted, he is good to Daph, but I can just presume how he could be to the others. Y'know what I mean? I'm just saying that I don't FEEL your Mark character. Perhaps a little more detail would have made this story better? At least, to me, it would've brought it from a '75' to a '100'. Don't give up on writing, though. You have good style. Will be looking forward to more from you(:

Please update. I'm dying to know what happens next.

I LIKE THIS STORY, BUT WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG TO UPDATE?

I've read all of your series: Assasin and Adonis and I have to say about Adonis, I love Marl and I hope when I grad from college, I FIND SOME1 LYK MARK!!!

I LOVE IT!! MORE PLS!!

this is a very good story. however i feel as though it is imcomplete. you could have done more with it, especially with vivianne and mina. Also, some editing would have made this all that much better. nevertheless it was very good. kudos!

I loved this story from the start to the finish, keep up the good writing. I would love to read more about them and soon.

Darling

It was a lovely bow you put in the box. Loved the ending...fabulous......

I like the start and the ending to this wonderful story. You did a great job in writing this story.

I’d like to see a third installment! Great storyline