All Comments on 'Adrianne Next Door'

Grammar.... No bra but rips bra off

Newbie pulling panties off

Good attempt needs editing

You kept switching from 1st person to 3rd person. The overall concept was ok, just work on your grammar.

" Adrianne was short, no more than 5'5"" 5'5" is actually the average height of an American woman, and that is ABOVE the height of other women, so 5'5" is by no means "short".

But not bad. Not bad at all for a start! Need to keep it going.

Excited me. I have had many such fantasies.

Debbie

Has me dripping, sweetie.

You did go several times from third person "they", to first person " she /I /we". Clean up and it may get more stars.

"shuttered" to close a window with shutters

"shuddered" to shake or shiver

"your" instead of "you're" - really??? How did this get by the editors?