All Comments on 'Afterglow Pt. 01'

Did you completely plagiarise this, or have you re-posted your own story...? I have definitely read this before.

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Thank you for posting this again! I hope this means the next chapter is coming? The story is really too good to end where it is now, so much hanging. I love Olivia's seduction of Elizabeth, so well done. The relationship is sweet and the sex super hot :)

Next chapter please

Amazing!! One of the best stories on here x

A pleasure to read. I'm eager for more.

Definitely like how it's not all about sex, but about the relationship as well, great work. Please continue

No! NO!!! Don't leave us hanging like this!!! MORE !!........... i'll beg????

Loved it. Great characters, great dialogue, just please don't leave us hanging!!

Thank you for writing and posting this. I am eager to read the remaining chapters.

I am really glad that you came back to this story and decided to add some more. I loved it then and I love it now. Great job! I hope you continue writing.

Maybe. Only potentially in terms of a stalker being able to stalk and threaten a member of DA's office without ramifications. We'll see what happens in next installment. Meanwhile I'm so enjoying every tidbit dispensed about Olivia. Mega charisma and ruco suave.

This story could go anywhere. Great characters and edgy dialogue. I would love a little more attention to settings and use of gritty and alternately majestic city as a supporting character. Greedy I know but this story is so rife with potential. Can't be helped. Meanwhile five stars is henceforth awarded with hope of many more like allotments to be disbursed .

I can't believe you have left it there, words cannot explain how I feel right now. FINISH THIS, please.

It's been a long time since I've gotten so attached to some characters and a story line such as this. I absolutely cannot wait for the next part. And please, ignore the naysayers- if they aren't hating or tearing something apart, they just aren't happy. Keep up the good work.

The story has a certain captivating flow to it. I really liked the premise and the powerful characters you seem to essay so effortlessly. I have a few piques too, but I'll save those for private feedback.

Overall, 5 star effort. I don't why I even bother to mention it with your work any more.

So is Olivia 15 yrs older or 10? You mentioned she's 38 but then turned around and said Elizabeth is 28. I find the 15 yr difference hotter, simply because i love older women.

There is most certainly something she can do. The suspect in a case just assaulted a lawyer from the DA 's office with a gun. She doesn't need proof. Because of her job, her word would put him in jail.

Do better research next time.

Maybe you should do better research next time.

You had me from the "git-go"! Just your verbage alone is enough to keep me reading! Another chapter is coming, and I can't wait to read it!

Thank you so much for writing this,I've just discovered your work,and I'm enjoying it

very very much!

Cute characters who feel realistic, amazing sex scenes, laughter, interesting asides and a cliffhanger ending. You must be fucking proud of this story, 5 stars! :D

But unlike u i like them a lot a lot all genders if i may say so, it just so happen that it depends on their attitude though if they're nice and dirty that's a rainbow to ur nimbus day but if rude that would be another topic. Be fair with urself, or better Put a stick right on ur pigheaded bubblebutt ;)) to clear d webs ;))

Thank you, Moongirl. Shortly before stumbling across "Afterglow" I had just read one of the worst put-together stories I have ever seen on this site. It didn't so much have a plot as a prolapse and how the hell it got accepted I don't know. You can't imagine the sheer pleasure of finding your story. Well-plotted, well-written and with interesting, believable characters. It's totally restored my faith in human nature. I'm looking forward to reading the following chapters, hoping that you can maintain the standard you have set here.

Thank you so very, very much!

It's a joy to read your stories, very nicely done!

L

This is simply amazingly well-written; makes me want to go back and edit our own stories :-) The development of both plot and characters makes this stand head and shoulders above most other postings on this site. I look forward to reading the rest of the series.

..... & enjoying it.

If just the first chapter, a foreplay of sorts, is so good I can only imagine the satisfaction of the climax. :-)

this is turning out to be a better story than I though I can't wait to read more of it

Fantastic writing, and parts made me LOL which You rarely get with stories posted here. I'm looking forward to a very late night now reading the following chapters!

I just have to read this series again. It's just so damn good. Part one is wonderful. So i'm on to part two now.

I loved your story! Authentic. True to life and fun...most writers don’t get me laughing out loud. You did. 5 Stars!

This story has a couple of things going for it that captivate the imagination. For example, in the opening scene where Elizabeth and Olivia first meet we get a strong sense of the rut Lizzie's fallen into and her desire to make a change. She's lonely and self aware enough to realize her work is consuming her and she's got to make a change. That she's on a date after a year of absinenance tells us she's making a leap. That she's out with Robert, a boy in man's clothing, gives us a sense of why she hasn't been going out, and her keen awareness of his shortcomings makes it easy to respect and sympathize. It is against this dry backdrop that the sparks of connection with Olivia ignite. There are some good moves made in developing Olivia's character as well, including the way she, out of her own loneliness, jumps the gun on their first date, and then apologizes while creating space.

That said, Elizabeth's confidant at work, a cross between the stereotypes of town gossip and the town bicycle, undermines whatever respect she's earned. Jackie is very clearly a person of low character and poor judgment, and while she's a good a foil for creating tension for the plot, Elizabeth's trust in her makes me lose interest in Elizabeth. Likewise, the gains in character development for both elizabeth and olivia are lost when there second date is so quickly taken over by crass dirty talk. There's definitely a place for that sort of thing - this is erotica after all - but the way it is handled here makes me think Robert, who has become one of the story's villains, is actually the author.

By the time we get to what is intended to be a cliffhanger at the story's end, the author and his protagonist have lost so much credibility that I simply don't have enough interest to give the benefit of the doubt. Seriously? We're supposed to believe she is a skilled attorney working for the DA's office and there's nothing she can do about being threatened by the chump who is stalking one of her clients?

To sum up, this is a story that starts off great and quickly runs into a ditch because the author can't decide whether he's writing a lesbian romance, a quick wank story, or a legal thriller. The latter two urges spoil the romance, and lack of realism spoils the legal thriller and the sexy bits are, depending on prefence, either too crude or not crude enough to support a good orgasm.

great fun, especially with the evil boyfriend after his ex.

Both plot lines are so compelling, I find myself aroused by the building affair between Elizabeth and Olivia, and worried about Rose.

Definitely was NOT expecting the strapon fight away, or the stalker entering the picture so flagrantly.

Man I wish I could write like this.

... were her boobs not noticeably affected? I was expecting her to maybe have had a mastectomy, but her boobs are only mentioned after that in a sexual way, with no mention of surgical scarring or anything. Seems to need an explanation.

To "anonymous" who posted on 3/12/20 ........

In what universe do all women who have breast cancer get their breasts removed or even require surgery on them??

Though I admit I am hardly an expert let alone an oncologist, I am sure that not all breast cancer sufferers require a biopsy let alone major surgery!

As for the story itself, it is the start of what could be an excellent actual story.

Well done so far .....

alexwatson62

I hope I'm not the only one that when someone like Jackie is mentioned or there in reality you can just feel the energy draining from those around. They are terrible and toxic. I am enjoying this story so far and will gladly move to chapter 2.

Wonderful writing! The dialogue is very well constructed and comes to life as the action plays out. Great storyline. Your descriptive passages are beautiful and so realistically worded. Definitely a 5 rating.

WOW, what a gorgeous story, so very well written.

Great build up, deep breath at the end.

Whooooo nice cliffhanger

Superlative work, in both artistry and craftsmanship. The tension of Elizabeth's ambivalence, the description of Elizabeth's and Olivia's lovemaking, and even more the graphic detail of Robert's loathsome assault -- I'm hooked.

ok...

So good I’m reading it again

Loved it