All Comments on 'Afternoon Delights'

Why did Eve’s name change to Annie? I read the story multiple times and it’s still confusing on when her name changed. Do better please.

Yeah, sorry about that... I ended up not liking the name "Annie" for the protagonist, so I changed it to "Eve", but when I did the change and when I proof-read it, it was very late and I was tired, so I accidently missed a few bits. I'm very sorry about that... I hope it wasn't too big of a turn off....

What did you think of the style generally though? Was it too graphic? Not enough context depiction?

Please don't worry about the name change ... its happened to all of us.

As to the story I agree to some extent that some more context would have helped the flow along and led to a slower build-up. But don't stop! Keep trying.

If late at night isn't your time, don't write late at night.

Nice one Perlem! I'm sure they enjoyed many afternoons together.

Keep writing...

Ruff

... who is Annie, or Anne? As I read it, there are only two women, but three names... Or is there something I don't get, Judy licks Eve's cunt and by doing so, she brings Annie to an orgasm? I don't think that's how they do it in Belgium... not even in Belgum... lol

Those three times Anne or Annie shows up in your story, you may have forgotten to change the real name of Judy's lover/neighbor (?) into Eve. Or something like that. Otherwise, your Afternoon Delight is a true delight.

<3

I liked it, the name change aside, easily done, not that graphic but understand your thinking. I would have preferred it to have a little slower, but then i like detailed role play, i like phrases like 'I stand there then I start to unfasten my dress, slowly, button by button, my breasts burst through the opening, exposing them to Tom’s gaze', but that is a personal thing. Keep writing