All Comments on 'Allison & Rick Ch. 01'

Good start. need to write more.

I can't wait for "the rest of the story" (sorry, couldn't help the Paul Harvey pun)

Just the right amount of mood setting, without geeting too bogged down.

Please hurry with the next submission!

started out good but you didn't allow her to get it on. when you do a erotic story you have sex in it. so where's the sex?

continue building this guy's self assurance.... with the neighbor, sis and mom this has great story line going!!!

This will make a good series, develope the story but dont lose it by trying to draw it out real long.

& ABSOLUTELY no go. PROMISES, (INPLIED) PROMISES SUCK if you don't have some action...

Great potential here to play out the fantasy and build it so erotically that it takes a few tries to read all the way through without spilling.

It's been 4 months now

I'd like to approach her but I'm not sure if it's time

Not another one page story and it makes you wait for more.

Good start. Now go for it and don't be shy. Since her husband is not paying her much attention, let lose all her inhibitions and seduce the boy when she is fertile--let her develop the boy into a man by letting him impregnate her, and her husband never knows.