All Comments on 'Alone and Desolate'

Sometimes faith and patience are a rare commodity.

All stories don't have a happy ending.

Well done.

Regards, DJ

It would seem to me that there is MUCH more to the story. Those knocking sounds aren't ants, I suspect, and just maybe they're in time. Then what?? Will Jeremy forgive a one time transgression? For a wife so obviously repentent I think he could manage that, don't you? She could easily be one wife who would never put herself in jeopardy again.

Jeremy may even have a one time transgression that he's feeling guilty about, too? He may, or may not, need to tell her so.

I really feel you need to add to this tale of woe. And give it the uplift it needs for us romanticists. Cuz it hurts when someone you are begining to like goes adrift.

I was disappointed when this wonderful tale ended - - not because you cut it too short, but because I wanted to know what happened next.

You are a wonderful writer and I enjoyed reading this story a great deal.

I'm confused, did anything happen between Nathan and Joanna. I got the impression they just actually slept together and nothing more. A sequal is needed to clear up this part. If she did do the dirty deed, so what. Her husband deserve's her infedility for being an invisible husband. Making her this lonely is not love. It's stupidity.I started a job once where the company planned on sending me to Spain then Argentina for six months at a time, and not be able to bring my wife and kids. I quit! Family should always come first. LadyCibelle, your a very good writer. Luis

A very good job of exploring the central character's actions and motivations.

I sure don't agree with her final action though. From the sounds of it, nothing really happened between her and Nathan. So what she did at the end seemed rather excessive.

Still, very good work.

this one rips the heart out and makes you feel what she felt. I sometimes think it takes a woman to understand a woman's pain, especially in a time such as the one your story potrays. It's deep, emotional and desolate. Wonderful job on a story that would be hard to write.

this one just doesn't work.

She spent the night in Nathan's arms but woke up with her clothes still on, wrinkled. so they didn't have sex, she just spent the night with him.

And THAT's a sufficient betrayal to cause her to give up on her husband and commit suicide?

Not remotely realistic, unless you were aiming to persuade us that she's mentally unstable, and I don't see that elsewhere in the story.

I like your stories, but this one just fell apart at the end....

ohio

Poignant and painful.

Thank you for a well-written tale,

--Alvaron

She took her life because she got drunk and woke up in another man's arms? This story is at the other extreme of the cheating wife stories where typically the wife either screws her lover for 20 years every week or have multiple partners and the husband takes her back.

I could see if she had fell in love with Nathan or Nathan had fell in love with her as a real betrayal. What about her kids that she spend 20+ year to raise to maturity? What about Suzie and her co-workers who she spend so much time to reconnect with during these lonely times? She is a major executive in charge of public relations?

Despite the above comments this story was well written with passion and excellent dialogue. We had a real sense of Jo's emotions. I just thought that the ending was too extreme. Thanks for writing a good story!

SleeplessinMD

I thought it might just be me so I wasnt going to post this but here is the comment I wrote earlier:

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I dont get it

Was this supposed to be some kind of character study of a woman with emotional problems? Was she developing mental disorders because of hormone changes or something? Seems to me that her initial depression and final gross over-reaction are all tied together and had nothing really to do with her husband or her own behaviour/doubts. Maybe he was the focus because he was the most important person in her life but it seemed to me that he was just a convenient target. Seems like she would have developed the same problems but blamed something else if he wasnt around. Her disjointed thinking, blindingly fast mood swings and gross over-reactions also make me think this story is more about mental illness than a marital crisis brought on by lack of communication/faith. Since it really didnt have much to do with her being married except in a superficial way, it probably should have been in non-erotic.

Thanks for writing though.

PS - is this part one? Must be the husband knocking on the door when she is drifting off at the end right? Unless she is really unlucky, OD's of prescription medication can usually be treated if the person is found soon enough and catching her before she is even unconsious seems like it would plenty soon enough to save her.

===========

If this wasnt a story about one woman's slide into depression, I have no idea what was going on since nothing happened regarding her marriage except in her head. If it was about mental illness, I dont know why it was in loving wives.

You did do a nice job of writing about her emotional problems though. The style and content both portrayed her depression and lack of lucidity very well. Thanks again for writing.

How many people in this day and age believe falling asleep in another mans arms fully clothed is adultery. Bad judgment, yes, being in another mans apartment alone on numerous occasions would be deemed suspicious by others. More people think kissing others on the lips as a casual thing and in this LT site a hand job is about the same as shaking hands, and touching a woman’s breast or squeezing her ass like id flick off some lint on a shirt. How times have changed.

I like to think in my mind that the knocking was the husband and through the taxi company found Joanna in time. My romantic side needed that.

I’m sure you will receive many calls for an ending to be forthcoming with all the details of the true outcome of Joanna and Jeremy. Some times the author gets the kick out of leaving the ending to the imagination, as it can be mysterious and artsy. Many times it’s not what the readers find entertaining as they didn’t write it but got involved in it and feel cheated by someone’s artistic bent. It leaves some seemingly unfulfilled and used by an author who wants to be dramatic not complete.

I’m fine with this particular ending on this story, but some leave stories hanging with so much untold. I guess you have to be cognoscente of your audience’s perception of being cute and being effective in concluding a thought pattern you have led your audience to share in their own feelings.

There are so many movies that bombed because of artsy non-endings, people want to be entertained and not feel empty.

Great writing

Thank you for the entertainment

PT

A fascinating portrait of the inner workings of a mind.

This is a great twist on the usual Loving Wives fare. I love how it raises the question of whether cheating with your heart "counts." It isn't out of the realm of possibility for J.C. to believe that simply putting her emotional investment elsewhere was a betrayal.

after reading the story confusion reigned. the story conclusion was not supported by the story.

i couldn't say it any better that ohio did, so enough said.

don

High emotional impact. Contrary to what DaniellKittin said, you don't have to be a woman to try to feel the impact of such a situation, of such a decision.

Nor do you have to be some perverted Christian who yearns for the days withces were found and hang like sick dogs, to feel a deep sense for this story, for what this highly faulty but also high principled woman decided to do.

She violated her own high standards of morality, of behavior, of ethical conduct,,,, She felt she btrayed the love, the trust, the loyalty, and the sanctity that existed in her marriage --- a betray, a trust, a love, and a sanctity that she would not and could not have accepted, if it had been broken/violated by her spouse,,,

As a result, she had no other recourse but to do as she had decided: taking her own life.

That act was to "explain" to her mate and family that despite some of her impulsive and unexplained/uncontralled acts --- i.e., by going to a bar and taking up with another man, simply because her mate had to be out of town, working hard to make their lives and future more secure, or, simply because she's "mad" or "depressed" or "feeling old", what-not --- she was committed to them to the very end, not wanting any selfish and ugly act to be a part of the family or love.

Of course, that kind of act, on her part (both acts, really), still leaves a man and his children motherless and sad for a life time. He can go out and marry another woman and make her a wife; but Joan's children will have to live with the consequences of Joan's selfishness for the rest of their lives.

Again, you don't have to be a false moralist to feel crime and punishment of this nature: narcissism and self-imposed punishment,,,, very different from a person with an attitude of, "Yeah, I just fucked 3 strangers, swallow all their bodily fluids and now I'm so ready for the next line of endless great lovers! And my husband will get the benefits of my skills!"

A story relating to a very selfish woman who loves no other but herself!

Nathan and Suzie were friends ‘used’ to allow her to wallow in self- pity. The act of suicide could only promote further her self-indulgence.

She protests the love for her husband too much, yet loves him little.

I feel no sympathy for Joanne, none what so ever.

Still, LadyCibelle you did manage to draw me into comment.

My best wishes.

it was a very good story, in that it was different. trying to add to it and words fail me. so i will stop here and say keep doing the unexspected.

as being anything like the other comments posted so far. The story was not about cheating or having an affair, not even close. Actually to me the story began at the very beginning with the comment ‘there I was, forty years old, married to a wonderful man with two great kids and suddenly I felt empty and alone.’

After that confession, the rest was just window dressing. It had nothing to do with work, work associates, not being invited to functions, husband working too much, kids growing up and leaving home, other couples seeming happy, lonely bartenders, ‘ice queen’ versus first name basis at work, none of these things were relevant any longer in her life.

The very moment she felt empty and alone, she had decided for whatever reason, her life was over. She no longer had a need, drive, or reason to keep on living and in reality didn’t want one. What happened after that point was just a hollow attempt at pretending to be searching for some new meaning or purpose to continue living.

She set everyone around her up for failure in their attempt to make her happy. It was never meant for any of them to succeed. The proof was in the ending. If what she claimed had been true, then she was finally going to get her wish. She claimed her husband working so much was the center point of all her problems. So if that were true, then why did she immediately go to the final step after learning he was going to fulfill her wish and come home to be with her?

The truth is, that was never really her wish or desire. It was actually an excuse for her to continue the course of action she had already decided on. His notice of returning home forced her to expedite her decision to end it all. She now needed a new excuse to justify her final decision, hence the dramatic excessive self-condemning of herself to replace the now defunct excuse of a missing husband.

The confusion of the readers is understandable. She didn’t commit adultery or infidelity, but she did in her mind to have an excuse to justify her intended suicide.

Very interesting story, a fan always.

While the writing was excellent, I felt that the emotional set up which was arranged for the wife was incredible in that that it was so very extreme. Up to a point the wife’s effort to make everything look nice to the outer world; justify her husband and blame herself are IMO common to many women. We rarely see this side of married life in LW and I wonder why. But then the author stretched that tendency to extremes which at least according to what was built up to that point were not necessary. For example her criterion for loyalty seems to be out of date, extreme and rigid. At the ending, was she her normal emotional self? Did she intend to sleep with another man? Did she sleep with another man? The answers: no, no and no. But all of that does not count in the harsh emotional terrain of this wife -It’s a death sentence for allowing yourself to be comforted by a friend ; or more bluntly for being hugged and kissed – Oh my!

Additionally, If this was a loving couple as it was described, it was not credible to not be hearing any communication with that loving husband. Surely, they have been talking some throughout these months. Not becoming privy to that important part of the story missed a key opportunity to shed light on the relations beyond the repeated complaints of the wife. What kind of mental tormentor was this husband anyway? Last I heard, even the armed services allow you to come home more frequently. Is that a way to portray a loving husband?

what were you trying to do.it failed.

Your writing detail is superb with holding my attention as well as creating an ease to which I followed the story. Too many writers get off on sidebars and loose the main focus. This you did not.

However, the story creates strong suspicions of the woman's state of mind suggesting that there were other issues with her mental stability that would result in such a desperate move. There was no infidelity involved, just friendship as the story eluded to. I don't believe suicide would be the outcome. A little too far left for me.

All in all, good writing. All the best to your future endeavors.

any one who said there's no infedility is just plain silly if not stupid!

she didn't have to say things like, "When I woke up in the morning next to him, even though my clothes were on, I had evidence of what transpired during the crazy night, after too many drinks were taken,,, I sort of felt wet and unclean between the legs,,," Why would she say that?

Isn't it enough to say, "I went with him and cuddled with him and then,,,, well, I don't remember but when I got up the next morning, even with my clothes on, I know I have betrayed all those I love"??? Of course, it's enough to say simply that; we KNOW what she had done, as did she!

Now, if the question is, Is that enough to commit suicide over? Well, no one can say, except the one who is making the decision. Why do we go to war? Why do we drop nuclear or chemicals on our enemies? Why do we cheat? Why do we cheat and hide our cheating, knowing it will usually end up being found out?

No one knows the answer, except the one who's making a decision when they are making the decision.

If Joan, in this story, thought her ACTS were enough to commit suicide over, then she MUST have a reason, in her mind, that such acts can not be tolerated, no matter by whom. Is that harsh? Yes. Is it justified? It is not for us to judge; it is for THE PERSON who has to make that decision to decide whether or not such is a justified action, for the crimes she knows she's committed.

This is not a slumber party, a sleep over, with some friends, with a whole bunch others sleeping around, in some silly but innocent manner.... This is about a woman going to the bar, drinking, going home with a person whom both she and her husband know, to cuddle up and sleep with him, to wake up next morning feeling very bad about it.

Is it an extremely selfish thing to do all those things, from the beginning to the end? Yes. Is it justified in her mind? Yes! 'Tis why she did it! We all do terrible things, from pissing in someone's coffee, to stealing, to committing suicide. Where is the clear line that says one act is okay but another is "mental"? Theres none; it is a per basis thing, per individual thing,,,

If Joan says she couldn't bear looking into her husband and children's eyes, knowing what she's done in their absence, she is the person who knows best!

Did those saying she screwed Nathan read the story?

In the story she clearly says:

"The shower energized me and I was now ready to kick myself. What if it hadn't been Nathan? Would I have been as lucky and not been taken advantage of?"

But I agree with KublaiK in that only she knew the depth of her betrayal of her husband. There are betrayals worse even than having sex with another person, and only she knew how bad her behaviour was.

Obviously she failed to live up to her own standards - she failed herself, and that's far worse than failing someone else.

See the story finally got posted. Excellent writing! At the end when there is a knock on the door- it better be her husband coming to save her. She does not deserve to die. Your writing is more for a novel or readers digest than for an erotic web site. I mean that with high regards for your writing, not as a negative comment. I'm waiting for her husband to get the hell in that room and save her.

With the highest respect for your writing and editing skills.

DG Hear

To Both Kanga and KublaiKhanlll: I was intrigued by each of your comments, arguing for accepting the wife's reasons for suicide. I respectfuly disagree with this view (see my first comment), but I would like to explain more with regard to the broader implications which have to do with what constitute appropriate reading or a good interpretation.

Unlike the legal world, in which you are assumed to be ‘trustworthy’ (or credible), unless there is evidence that proves that you are not; The adventure of reading asks us to engage with a FICTION. It HAS to be the meeting of the minds from the author’s to each reader’s system of beliefs and convictions, or else nothing happened! The author has to walk the thin line of convincing many readers which have variety of beliefs and convictions. It’s tricky, and probably that’s one of the reasons why not every one can be a writer. I guess we do share some universal qualities; some cultural commonalities. We don’t live in bubbles; we have a language. One thing we definitely can not do is throw our hands in the air and say: ‘to every action there must be a reason. We may not understand it .But we have to trust the person who says that ‘x’ was the reason no matter what that person says. For him/her that was the reason’. At least not in reading fiction.

You buy that argument and you drop the bottom under all practice or theory of evaluation or literary criticism – at least in the sub section of characterization. While this trusting approach may constitute an appropriate civil behavior in daily life, that is obviously not the case in literature. The author affords us a look into motivations; world views - any thing that he/she deems worthy to “sell” us their story and its characters. But at the end of the day, not unlike a mechanical puppet - it has to work! And if we sit on the drawing board, and see all the sketches, we have to say: ‘wait a minute; people don’t walk like that, so your puppet will not work! I don’t buy it! As readers we are bound to get engaged, and honestly ask our selves: did I buy it? Was I convinced?

Ultimately I conclude that in your “Trust the character” argument you demonstrated my POV. For if this wife’s reasoning for a suicide wouldn’t have been so unconvincing and confusing, at least some one would have pointed out why SPECIFICALLY THEY TOO felt that her suicide made sense as only unbearable and terrible circumstances could. At times we see this kind of stories, and while we may disagree with the morality or some other aspect of it, we can see what tremendously devastating circumstances that character was under.

precisely which part of my comment is "arguing for accepting the wife's reasons for suicide"?

I thought I was agreeing that there are more ways of being unfaithful than actually screwing.

I never mentioned suicide, but actually I believe her reaction was unnecessary and way over the top in the context of the rest of the story.

I've read Kolkore's post below three times and I still can't begin to imagine what he is trying so hard to say.

I'm glad to see I'm not the only one who doesn't follow what Kolkore was trying to say in his longgggg comment. :/ I sure hope he understands himself and/or like hearing himself talk because he seems the only one who does.

After his first comment I sent him a long email explaining point by point where he had gone wrong in his appreciation of my story, detailing clearly where his understanding of my characters's motivation had been faulty but, unfortunately, I never heard from him. Seems to me he likes to comment but doesn't like to be shown where he's wrong.

Anyway, I'll use the occasion to thank you all for reading and commenting on my story, writing to me and asking questions, offering insight into how some people can misunderstand what's clearly under their nose etc...

LC

Clearly I did not communicate as well as I could. Sorry about that. I have double checked my email, and as of now have not seen any message from the author.

I was somewhat taken aback by what seems like more than an ounce of sarcasm. I try to adhere in my comments – both in content and in the tone to the netiquette- which essentially boils down to: ‘Write as if you are talking face to face to the person you are writing to’.

My goal is NOT to demean or to hurt anyone.I wrote because I believed that I had a valid point (I wish I was smart enough to be the original owner of it)which was worth discussion. That's it. Not every exchange has to reflect on other people’s capabilities, and therefore be touched by bitterness and hurt feelings. Having said that, if you wish that I do not comment on your stories just let me know.

My comments are a response to my fellow reader’s KublaiKhanlll comments, I thought they applied to Kanga’s comment too but apparently I was wrong.

Here is the (hopefully) tighter version.

The suggestion that readers are bound to trust or accept the decisions or statements of characters in a story regarding reasons for their action because we presumably cannot fully understand other people’s mindset, is off the mark and for that matter reflects IMO a misperception reg. the role of readers in reading fiction.

1. I believe that in reading literature, the burden of convincing the reader in any aspect of the story: it’s themes; plot development or characters issues (such as credibility) lies squarely on the author’s shoulders.

2. In order to achieve the goal of “selling” us the story, the author has tools which no one has in real life. In real life none of us can gain access to other people’s inner most thoughts and feelings; belief system and values and even their subconscious. But the author can do that for us with a draw of a pen (or a touch on the keyboard)

3. Because the plot and the characters are FICTIONAL, and the story comes to life in each reader’s MIND, each reader HAS to be convinced one at the time – or else the author has not done his/her admittedly difficult job.

If we as readers come out at the end of a story saying: ‘I don’t know about this character’s behavior, but I guess I have to trust her’, then we as readers have not done our job. Instead, we should each have asked: was it convincing to ME or not. That’s it. There is no other judge but one reader at a time.

It’s exactly because both the author AND the reader ARE allowed into the character’s mind (if the author have done a good enough job) that it makes no sense to say ‘It’s not for us to judge’.

Finally, again, my comments are NOT meant to be an attack or an insult on anyone. And in this case not on KublaiKhanlll and not on the author. Rather, I saw KublaiK comment as an opportunity to discuss an interesting issue. I respect the forum and I respect the commenters, or else I would not have invested time in it.

For both the story AND the comments.

Ok story first. Wetapap, the old codger is on to something.

Wife started out saying her life is over. Then told us she had a great life.

Why?

Depression.

And the more everyone tried to help her, the more she ran from it into her own pain and agony.

In the end did she cheat? No, but by him coming back, she had to react...had to SAY she did becouse of him so that she can go out with all guns blazing in her pain.

Twisted yes, but that is the mind of a sick person.

The bar tender was not a cad and jstu held a crying drunk woman as she passed out in his house...BAD place but whith her husband NOT at home right then and the state she was in... IT was safer than letting her go on her own.

But wife was setting herself up for the 'noble' fall: "I cheated and he left me but I cheated becouse he never paid attention to me"

But he did, he changed his job for her.

So she grasped at the "i spent a night at another man's house' straw and tried to recover plan.

Was it something good? nope. Logical? nope... but then gain if he quit his travel jsut to make her happy when he THOUGHT she was unhappy...what woudl he do if she asked?

Logic and depression don't get along.

now for Kilkore.

I know where you are coming from.

All we have is what is in the story. If the wife doesn;t say she cheated...she didn;t cheat. Expessially if we are in HER 1st person.

We can;t introduce new facts, unless we are writing a sequel, we can only work with what we got.

BUT

At the same time we are actually and usually working with JUST one person's 'view' of what happened.

Take a look at the very well written tale "Marriage On The Rocks" by Jack Straw. In it we get all these reasons why the wife cheated...and blame is EVERYWHERE but with the wife.

BUT we the readers know better.

The thing is people don;t tell the truth when they tell stories.. They minumise their blame and maximize what others did.

Sounds contradictory huh? hve to take the story on what it is but people lie.

Not really. A Fact is a fact. Did you or did you not cheat. fact and here no she didn;t have sex. why? she said she was clothed and never told us she did.

Not facts...WHY was she drinking to excess with the bartender? becouse husband is away...wrong that jsut LET her do it. She drunk becouse she was depressed.

Facts are facts..reasons can be debated.

Here the fact is she didn;t cheat. I think she was setting herself up to cheat so that she can have a reason to commit suicide. Smart no but this is what I come up with.

Commenters: Why was she doing what she was doing? Can YOU explain?

And anyone else interested...send me an email addy and I'll be more than happy to show you were you're wrong and were you read what YOU wanted to read and not what was in the story. I don't want to flood the portal with back and forth response from me so, please, give me some place where I can show you wrong and I will...in a heartbeat!

For example, you're all saying she got drunk.....show me where I wrote that!!! Nowhere did I say she drank too much or got drunk...not ONE place. You in the US have a saying that I like..."Don't 'assume' because you're making an ass of you and me". Well, let me return that saying to you......READ what is there and not what you WANT to read. Then you'll understand what the story is about.

I'm just glad some people did without me having to spell it out for them.

No hard feelings :)

LC

See I told you, it was a good one.

31… Ops sorry, 32 comments, can't be much wrong with that.

Good stories spark up a little controversy. You can't please all the people and all that!

I'm not going to join in these arguments going on here. I read it before most, and it made perfect sense to me. If there some closed or narrow minds out there. That's they're problem.

DC

Things we all keep calling "morality", "ethics", "good behavior," "bad behavior," etc. are not that clear cut.

Ethics and morality --- though have overlapping among cultures --- are shaped heavily by local mores, beliefs, practices, and tradition, albeit always with a certain absorption from outsiders/other cultures...

In some cultures, it is NOT moral or ethical to butcher pigs or cows; in others, dogs or cats; in some still, perhaps very small, if they exist (but certainly INDIVIDUALS do exist who hold this view), killing big beautiful animals for food is just a reptilian instinct which they think humans ought to be moving away from, with our capacity to grow other highly nutritious food stuff that can make up for the lack of meat from animals.

Now that that BS is over, a few more words on the story:

In this story the wife/woman decided to commit suicide because, for whatever impulses that made her do that things she could not accept AFTERWARD, she did NOT live up to her own high standards: be totally trustworthy and eternally loyal to your spouse and children, no matter what others say or do, no matter outside temptations,,,

She expected those simple things from her mate and she expected that HE EXPECTED them from her, too!

In her view, she had failed him and their children horribly. She must take responsibility for such failing.

Other women, in her situation or even in situations many times worse, lived to fuck many more, whether their mates eventually know about such bodily fluid exchange with strangers and friends or not ---- they would continue to live happily, keep engaging in them, with a different sense, or different set, of morality and ethics,,,,

That is NOT this woman! I respect that in people, even if too extreme for me. They set high personal moral and ethical standards and when they fail them, they punish themselves, NEVER BLAMING OTHERS for their failings!

This, obviously, is very different from 99 percent of the other stories and characters where they fuck around and when caught, they blame such pursuits on loneliness, lack of communication, lack of attention, approaching middle age and just wanted to see if they still attract strangers who would be willing to give them a hard roll in the hay, etc., etc.

For this woman, that's not for her. Nor is it for her mate or children (when they are grown)...

ALONE AND DESOLATE is a sanitized cross pollination between Romeo/Juliet and Madame Bovary: -----

In Romeo/Juliet, the characters died for each other selflessly: "If I can not have you, I will not live."

In Madame Bovary, on the other hand, the madame died for herself selfishly: "I am too ashamed, so much in dept, and there's no way out it, so I will no longer live."

In real life I've only known a REAL Romeo/Juliet situation where a young couple committed suicide because their parents would not allow them to marry each other. There are a couple Madame Bovary out there.

But by and large, society is filled to the brim with characters who always blame others for their fucking around, or who just don't give a fuck what anyone else --- including their spouses and/or children --- says: all they want is as much sex, excitement, romance, attention, love, waht-not and they will get them wherever they could find them, in bars, motels, beach, backroom, in cars, on weekends,,,,,

It's refreshing to see, to read about, people who set high standards for themselves and for those they love and trust deeply and when they themselves fail those standards, they are willing to punish themselves harshly.

It's called taking responsibility! It's not "mental illness"!

depression is a form of mental illness, that doctors treat with drugs, and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. This crazy wife gave her family the worst back stabbing ever. Suicide is the coward's way out. She loved her family so little. It's amazing some people think that suicide is a noble act.LadyCibelle your a very talented writer. Keep them coming Regards Luis

i hate melodramas...

This story was well written and engaging. I didn't like the ending but that has more to do with me than the quality of the story (it hits too close to home regarding depression). Thank you, LadyCibelle, for this submission.

I read the second story first and did not quite understand his melodrama at her actions. But then I read this one and did not get anything but hers at first. I finally began to understand from the second story. I got that she got lonely and depressed and then hated herself for doing everything that she had always strongly considered cheating! Even though she had not done so sexually! Put the two together and she had to leave him for her cheating in every way but sex! I get it!!! And I agree with her on the cheating part... It does not have to be sexual. Yet, he also cheated her in staying away so much... Deep story...

Why? What did she do that was a betrayal? Was she simply mentally ill? Can you explain please?

I don't get it either. I think she is mentally unstable. But she is not my character. Regardless it was a good read. Thank you. Jim

Dear LadyCibelle,

There's a saying, "Write what you know about". Most writers do that. Works of fiction are loosely based on the author's life experiences. I'm glad yours isn't Joanna's. Perhaps "Joanna" was someone you knew.

The last of the story was really unexpected. Excellent (if sorrowful).

Ya Ya Ya life is what you make it...Ya Right

Sometimes we get into a cycle, and it seems strongest when in is a downward spirial. I am sad, therefore I am sadder, I am sad because I am sadder........ Never seems to happen to happy feelings

Some might say it is the devils work

But how do we treat people with excessive happiness???

Depresson is a clinical disease in some cases. People don't say get over it to a happy person

lonliness and dispare can drive us to strange places. My life was very much like the one in this tale,,,except it was within my home with wife and family. My wife has since died and my family has moved on and here I still am

Title says it all. Does not flow smoothly. Makes difficult to read.

Rids the earth of one piece of scum.

1*

Author - don't worry about comments from dickless fags like Dwornack [must be related to that retard shoe-no-friggin-clue].

doesn't take being old to be ugly - DWmoroncock is butt-ugly at any age.

doesn't take being old to be ugly - DWmoroncock is butt-ugly at any age.

only means there is something else wrong with your life. TK U MLJ LV NV

it's a default response whenever dwornock gives 1

Nicely written, moving and interesting. But, I kind of wanted to swallow some pills after reading it. Well, just for a moment. Thanks for sharing. Full marks.

Such depression. She didn't need a barman, she needed an extensive session with a shrink. Or her husband to stay at home. Tough to read.

When someone (not means virtually anyone) committs adultery there is always preplanning involved, such as the more sexy a woman dresses before going to a bar alone. This case is also one of a lot of preplanning part of which is placing themselves in a position where it is highly likely that they will find themselves compromised. In this story the wife ends up in the bartender's apartment, now in the hell did she expect that to go anywhere bud badly ? In her entire story she downplays or ommits the notion that she had a serious series of bad choices. A child knows that bad decisions and choices lead only to bad consequences. Viola !! She gets herself fucked by the bartender and the author wants to blame that on lonliness rather than call it the bad consequence of series of bad decisions all of which were preventable even if she was still lonely.

commit suicide do it but dont beg and whine just do it bitch,asking him not to look for her is a bitch trick it means look for me,and as far as her suicide with kids- well fuck her, the coward burn you bitch,been there lived it,pissed on her grave!

But if I'm not mistaken, she didn't really cheat on her husband. She fell asleep in his arms, right? Seems like a drastic reaction and the ending was abrupt. Excellent writing and very engaging. Five stars.

She did not commit adultery - she did not cheat - she barely qualifies for having betrayed his trust.

She was wrong for the level of interaction with Nathan - it is not right for a married woman - BUT - she did not DO anything else - this is far to easy to get past - even for grizzly old farts like me -

Add to that the way she is beating herself up and i would need to find a way to "knock" some sense into her (figuratively) she SHOULD have spoken to Jeremy - of course. Like so many stories in life and fiction - communication can fix almost any issue if there is an interest in fixing it - there seemed to be here.

So she is being looked for - and she is likely to be found - now she needs support and help to keep what she never really lost but was close to throwing away.

You make as good a writer as you seem to make an editor - thanks for the sharing -

But committing suicide based on "falling asleep" with another man (no sex) simply isn't believable.

This could easily be followed up with whoever was knocking breaking the door open and getting an ambulance. The ending was hard to swallow like the others said, I don't know it sounds like she was a bit unstable mentally.

Although I live alone I hope I never feel that desolate that I want to take my life. Oh wait, I take pills not to feel that way. Maybe she should have also.

It'd be harder to forgive the suicide attempt than a one-time fuck up that she is remorseful for.

Some comments puzzled me. I retraced story over and over trying to find where the author wrote she was drunk or had sex-or implied either

I found none.

Although I might disagree with her decision, you need only to carefully read her letter to understand it.

Until I read the follow up story, I was confused by her reasoning. All came clear when husband described her philosophy and beliefs.

Sad that believed she could not face him...seventeen years of being so long apart, and the loneliness coming to the fore when children had gone from home.

She did caution in the talks they had leading up to their lifestyle decision, that eventually problems would arise.

Personally if I were the husband I could not have decided that 20 plus years of repeated month long absences from wife and children, home for two weeks the off again would be worth the reward he envisioned. All that sacrifice so he could retire at 55???????

Not meaning to spoil for those who have yet to read ending but I feel for her and question husband's thinking and actions

I have noted many authors who thank LC for her help with their works.

I applaud her exceptional writing skills

As she is drifting off, she hears faint knocking. Will someone get there in time to save her? One last question in a story without many answers.

for some unknown magical reason the boss suddenly one day cares that her employees dont think she is cool enough to party with (why)

In order to remedy this she starts bitching about her marriage to her secretary (how does this make her cool enough to party with)

And then in order to ensure her employees want to party with her she fucks a bartender becuase her husbands didnt call home one random night (what sort of logic is this)

Depression and guilt are strong emotions, and sad to say it can lead to suicidal ideation or suicide. To those that are contemplating suicide, please reach out to your family, love ones, or friends. I know, I been there

Can’t score. Greek sad.

LOVE slap-hapy-papy #9