Always a Bridesmaid

Three more days passed without any communication between them. Kelley had just landed after flying a 'maintenance hop' to check out a jet in order to ensure it was good to go when he saw his phone had a text from Shelby.

He waited until he got home that evening to read it. In fact, he ate dinner first then opened a beer before looking at it. It read:

"Dearest Jason. Regrettably, I have not heard from you in these many days. I must therefore assume you are not willing to apologize for your behavior nor do you wish to go forward with our June wedding. It is my sincere hope that you will be gentleman enough to confirm my assumption so that I may get on with my life should you no longer wish to be a part of it. Sincerely, Shelby Stanton."

Kelley shook his head and said, "What a trip."

He tapped out a quick reply.

"I would like to discuss this with you in person. Could we perhaps do so sometime this week at your convenience?" He hit 'send' and thought, "Two can play this game."

Almost immediately he got her response.

"I will happy to entertain your presence at our home tomorrow evening at 7pm if this is acceptable to you. Sincerely, Shelby Stanton."

Kelley laughed out loud this time. "Jesus! She must be living in her own Gone With the Wind movie."

He tried not to laugh when he replied:

"I shall call upon you tomorrow at the Stanton residence at precisely7pm."

He wondered if she'd even pick up on the sarcasm.

Their meeting was brief and reasonably cordial if by cordial one meant not saying exactly what one wanted so very badly to say.

"I thank you for taking the time to see me," she said when he told her his feelings hadn't changed and that he still felt it was her who would have to make some changes.

"While I don't believe I am either legally or morally obligated to do so, I am returning the ring you gave me. The ring which supposedly symbolized your promise to marry me." The last line was clearly meant as a dig as though his personal integrity had been breached by failing to fulfill this...contract.

He took but it, but didn't thank her knowing that would also be perceived as some sort of slight.

"Okay. I guess this it, then," he said after putting the ring back in his pocket. "I um...wish you well, Shelby. I hope you'll find the kind of man you're looking for..." He thought about not saying it but couldn't, "and so richly deserve."

Once again, the sarcasm went right passed her as she clearly thought she did deserve the kind of man she wanted; the kind of man Kelley clearly was not.

"You needn't be concerned with such things anymore," she informed him. "But for your information, I have met someone who understands the importance of an event like a wedding the same way as I do. Regardless, I also wish you the same, Lieutenant Kelley," she said very formally. "I see no need for me to accompany you to the door so if you don't mind showing yourself out?"

Kelley nodded and said goodbye. As he turned around he mouthed the words, "Good riddance," and smiled knowing she couldn't see him.

Two months later, he got a very nice-looking envelope in the mail and noticed the Stanton address in the return section.

He opened it and almost started laughing. "She didn't waste any time, did she?" he said to himself as she read it.

"Colonel and Mrs. Robert J. Stanton request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter Shelby to Mister..."

She was marrying some guy named Rathbun or Wrathman in three months at a place called The Rhett House Inn. The connection with Rhett Butler and Gone With the Wind was even funnier now that Kelley could look at the situation from afar. He shelved the invitation and didn't give it another thought until it got close to the date of the wedding.

He hadn't bothered to RSVP and hadn't even planned on going until that very day. He wouldn't crash her wedding, but the thought of crashing her reception made him smile and he decided about four hours ahead of time he'd do just that. He wouldn't make a scene, he'd just show up and see how the rest of the clan reacted to his presence. It was immature to be sure, but there was a part of him that just couldn't resist.

More than that, someone he very much wanted to see again would be there. Someone he hadn't been able to stop thinking about since the first time he met her. It made no sense, but he was unable to get her out of his mind so for that reason alone he was going.

He showered, shaved very closely, then got out his dress-blue uniform and got ready to go.

The Inn had a chapel and a reception hall which was convenient for couples wanting to avoid having guests drive someplace else after the wedding. It was exactly the kind of place he associated with Shelby Stanton, now Rathbun, or whatever her new name was. It was the 'perfect' location for the perfect wedding.

He pulled up, found a place to park, and did just that. He got out of his car, put on his white barracks cover (often erroneously called a 'hat' by non-Marines), centered it on his head, and began walking toward the door.

He was about halfway there when he heard someone call out, "Hey, there! Yeah, you. Marine!"

It was nearly dark, but he could still just make out her face. She was even more beautiful than he'd remembered, her makeup done to perfection and wearing a gorgeous, light-blue gown.

"Hey there, yourself!" he said as they walked toward each other.

"Wow. Don't you look handsome!" Emma said as they embraced.

"Thanks, but it's just the uniform. Danny DeVito would look like a rock star in this."

Emma laughed and said, "It's so good to see you again. And such a pleasant surprise to see you crashing the reception after failing to RSVP. Shame on you, Lieutenant!" She pulled away then whispered, "I love it!" She took his arm and said, "Come on. I'll walk you inside. I can't wait to see everyone's face when they see you!"

As they walked Kelley said, "You look amazing, Emma."

"Well, thank you, kind sir," she told him. "I'm getting very good at this whole bridesmaid thing, you know." He laughed with her as the arrived at the door. "Hang on to you hat!" she said. "Oops. It's been a while. Hand on to your cover," she said correcting herself.

Kelley wasn't the only Marine officer at the reception. He didn't recognize anyone else however, and several of them were old enough that they had to be retired. Most likely the colonel's colleagues from his days on active duty.

As expected, Kelley's presence drew a very predictable reaction first from Colonel Stanton himself, then his wife, Kendra, and lastly from Shelby herself. The attacks were blistering but brief and Emma ended up taking the brunt of it for 'ruining her sister's dream wedding' or 'escorting this heartless, uncaring man' inside.

"If you need leave, I understand," Emma told him after Shelby let him have it. Her new husband never said a word and Kelley thought he must be exactly the kind of man she wanted and deserved. One with no spine nor a pair of balls.

"I'd like to get something to eat first," he told her. "Would you care to join me?"

She took the arm he extended and said, "I would!"

They filled their plates with 'poo-poos' Kelley was sure had all been carefully hand-selected by Shelby after much thought and deliberation. It was cool but not cold outside so Kelley asked if Emma would mind joining him.

"I saw a couple of tables not too far from the door," he told her.

"Sure. Let's do it!" she told him. He carried both plates and she carried their drinks.

They were just outside where they could talk quietly while still able to hear the noise from the celebration inside.

"So it looks like your sister finally got the wedding of her dreams," he said just before taking a bite of a chicken wing.

"She didn't waste any time," Emma said.

"Who's the lucky guy?"

"Some plumber she met. Oh, I gotta tell you the story!" Emma explained what had happened with the ring and how they met as well as Shelby's fascination with him owning his own company at just 35. "And best of all? He has no intention of ever leaving Beaufort. Talk about a dream man, right?"

"I'd say it's kind of sad, but only Shelby knows what's best for her."

Emma almost choked on her food when she heard that. She coughed loudly and said, "Oh, Shelby knows what's best for Shelby. You can count on that!"

After another short laugh, Kelley said, "You really do look beautiful, Emma."

She got more serious than he'd seen her get before as she said, "Thank you, Jason. That...that was really nice. I don't hear things like that too often."

"You should," he said sincerely.

"Shelby kind of sucks all of the oxygen out of the room, you know? But it was nice to hear. So thank you."

He took a deep breath then without warning asked her, "Are you...seeing anyone by chance?"

"No. No one at all."

"There have to be at least a few handsome doctors at that hospital of yours. You can't tell me none of them have hit on...sorry, expressed interest...in going out with you."

Emma laughed politely and said, "I've gone out with a few of them."

"Nothing serious?"

"I thought so a couple of times but one turned out to be married and I didn't know for almost two months."

"Ouch," Kelley said sympathetically. "And the other one?"

"He was several years younger than me and he let it be known I wasn't someone he'd even consider getting serious with. I was just...fun."

"Ouch—again," he said. "Was the age difference really a big deal?"

"To him, I guess. I never really thought about it. He was good looking, funny, intelligent. You know, like you, Jason." Her smile still amazed him and tonight, with her hair and makeup so beautifully done, he couldn't believe he hadn't noticed just how attractive she was before. Or maybe he had but her beauty had taken second place to her outlook on life, one with which he very much agreed. "He was a 27-year old intern and I was a 32-year old...hag?" She smiled but he could tell she'd been hurt.

Without thinking he reached for her hand that wasn't holding food and said, "Don't talk like that, okay? You're nothing close to that." There was enough light that he could see her eyes, eyes that were looking into his. "You're really beautiful, Emma. In fact, having seen you and your 'beauty-queen' sister side by side tonight, I'd be putting that tiara on your head and not hers."

"Oh, please!" she said trying to pretend his comment was just silly. "Like I'd want to wear that cheap piece of sh...trash." She looked around then laughed. "Why do I still care? Piece of...shit," she said. This time both of them laughed.

Kelley hadn't let go of her hand and when they stopped laughing he said, "Why do you do that?"

"Do what?" she asked as though she had no idea.

"Why do you pretend not to know how beautiful you are? Why do you play off compliments like they can't be true when they are? You really are beautiful, Emma."

She didn't reply. Instead, she pulled her hand away and reached for a napkin. "The gnats are terrible tonight," she said even though it wasn't warm enough for bugs. "I must have one in my eye," she said as she looked down and dabbed first one and then the other.

"You've lived in her shadow all your life, haven't you?" he said without accusation. "And because your personality wouldn't allow you to lash out or be mean, you just took it all these years. You gave Shelby the spotlight when you're the better person."

He saw her blinking away tears as he spoke. He got up and walked around to her side and sat next to her. "I know it's your family and I'm still an outsider, but it's very clear now you're the star of the 'Stanton clan', Emma. You're the one who's truly amazing. No offense to Shelby, but she's not even in your league." He put his hand on her forearm and said quietly, "You're the one who's beautiful both inside and out."

She tried to laugh and make light of it but it was hard for her talk. "Yeah, for a just-turned 33-year old eternal bridesmaid."

Kelley put his arm around her back then rested his strong hand on her small shoulder. "Would you like to go do something together?"

She carefully wiped under her eyes again then said, "You mean right now? Tonight? During my sister's reception?"

"Well, yeah. If you want..."

"Oh, hell yeah! Let's go!" she said managing a genuine smile.

Kelley stood up, offered his hand, and helped her up. "You're freezing," he said. "Let's get you into the car and turn on the heat."

"Thank you," she said when he closed her door.

He reached into the back seat and grabbed a sweatshirt. "It's clean," he said as he waited for her to lean forward so he could drape it over her shoulders.

"It's warm, too!" she said thanking him again.

"You're welcome," he told her as he sat down and started the car.

She looked over at him just as he was getting ready to put the car in gear and he turned to look back at her. "I wasn't kidding, Emma. You really are beautiful," he said quietly.

His hand was on the gearshift when she reached out and put hers on top of his.

"You make me feel beautiful, Jason. And to tell the truth, I...I haven't felt that way in a very..."

He looked at her first, then leaned over and waited for her to stop talking. When she did and he saw her close her eyes, he kissed her softly on the lips.

The kiss lasted two or three seconds and when it ended she said, "Okay, the kiss was very nice but what was that all about?"

Kelley smiled at her at said, "If I have to explain that to you, I take back anything I may have said about how smart you are. I don't really have to explain it, do I?"

She still had her hand on his and when she looked at them together, Jason took hers in his and held it.

"Look. You're great, Jason. Really great, as a matter of fact. But Shelby told me how how old you are so I just want you to know I'm not..."

"Not into being happy?" he offered.

"Happy? I haven't been happy since...since, well, 2008. Between my work and my gardening, I am content, though. I just don't need a sympathy date or whatever you're thinking this is, okay? I like you a lot Jason, but I'd rather go somewhere and have some fun or even sit and talk for a while, you know?"

"Yes. I do know. But I don't think that's what you need. And to tell you the truth, I don't think it's what you really want, either."

Emma laughed quietly and said, "Hmmm. So now you know what I want and what I need. You should be telling fortunes, not flying planes. Sorry—jets. It really has been a long time since I hung out with a pilot or more accurately, a Marine pilot, who cares about such details."

"You still miss him, don't you?" he asked quietly as the engine warmed the car.

"Sometimes," she said wistfully. "I really loved him, Jason."

"Are you possibly afraid to fall in love again? I mean to let yourself really, really love someone again?"

"No, I don't think so." She paused for a moment then said, "I don't know. Maybe I am." She smiled then said, "You seem to have all the answers. Why don't you tell me?"

"Okay, how about this? I think you're afraid you'll be hurt again—maybe even deeply hurt. You're worried that if you let someone inside and get close to him, then, one way or the other, he'll leave you alone, and that's too great a risk to take. Playing it safe is easier. It's risk free and you can't get hurt. Of course, you can't be loved, either, but you've decided safety is your priority."

Emma sat quietly for a few seconds once he finished speaking. "You're very wise for someone your age. It's too bad Shelby couldn't appreciate all of your good qualities. I think she saw them, but to her they were just blocks to be checked off in having the perfect husband; someone she could show off at parties and possibly even more importantly, someone our father would approve of."

"Oh! So are you saying I'm perfect?" he asked trying to lighten the mood.

"You're all right," she said playfully not willing to commit to an answer.

"You already know what I think about you. Good sense of humor, fiercely independent, smart as can be, and drop-dead gorgeous."

"Yeah, right. We've been over that 'gorgeous' thing. I'm pushing 35 and when I squint? Oh, trust me, you don't want to see what I see. It's not pretty let alone gorgeous."

He let go of her hand and reached out and touched her face. "I like what I see just fine. In fact, I like it very much."

"Ha! That's because it's really dark in here."

"You see. There you go again. You're doing it. You won't accept a compliment because then you might have to confront the fact that a guy really does believe you're beautiful—inside and out. And that scares you. Please don't be afraid of me, Emma."

She looked away and said, "Maybe we should go do whatever kind of something we were going to do."

"On one condition," he said.

"What's that?" she asked barely loud enough to be heard.

"Will you look at me, please?"

He waited for her to turn toward him and when she finally did he said, "I'm going to kiss you again, and I want to you tell me how it makes you feel."

"You meant to ask me if it's okay for you to kiss me again, right?" she said trying to get the upper hand or at least stay in control.

"No, I'm not asking permission, Emma. I'm just letting you know I am going to kiss you again."

She looked away and said, "Jason, you don't have to do that just to..."

He kissed her again while she was still trying to speak. This kiss lasted for several seconds and when he pulled away she whispered, "Oh, wow. I haven't felt that way...either, for a very long time."

"Yeah? What way is that?" he asked as he gently played with her beautifully-styled hair.

"Like I...like I...enjoyed that very much. Like...I'd like you to do that again," she said very quietly.

"You mean like this?" he whispered before kissing her a third time. He put his hand behind her head as she did the same to him. Within a second he felt her offer him her tongue which he accepted by offering his back.

"So...how was that?" he asked.

"That was...wow."

He saw her smile and asked what was funny.

She ran her hand against the grain of his high-and-tight haircut and said, "That. I forgot about Marines having 'beard stubble' on their heads."

"Are you a fan of short hair?"

"Uh-huh," she said quietly. "I love a man who's very tightly groomed."

"Good thing," he said. "It may be a while before I can groom myself otherwise."

"Are you presuming I'll be around for a while?" she asked with a smile.

"I am. In fact, I'm sure of it."

"Someone is very full of himself tonight," she teased.

"Let's put it this way. Nothing would make me happier than to have you in my life, Emma. For as long as you'd like."

Her eyes were looking into his, two dark saucers surrounded by white. She was searching for something. Something like honesty or sincerity. When she was sure she saw it, she said, "Please don't hurt me, Jason."

"Are you letting me in?" he asked without smiling.

"Yes," she said barely audible.

"I won't hurt you, Emma. Ever."

"Promise?" she asked the last of her veneer melting away.

"I promise."

"Then would you please kiss me again?"

In spite of the storage space and gearshift between them, he did his best to put his arms around her then kissed her like he hadn't yet done. She put hers around his neck and accepted his kiss and the playfulness of his tongue.

"I just realized you've never seen where I lived," she said when the kiss ended.

"You're absolutely right," he replied. "I should probably know where that is. You know, in case you decide you'd like to see me again sometime."

"Right. Just in case," she said with the brightest, happiest smile he'd ever seen on her pretty face before.

"It's in Port Royal, right?"

"Uh-huh. Just head toward Parris Island and I'll tell you where to turn."