Ambiguities

"My diddies are famished... feed them, Donnie. NOW!"

"Are... you sure?"

"They need you now, Donnie... we'll talk afterwards... come on, now... please!"

Donald literally dove into her welcoming cleavage, foolishly hoping to grasp all of her at once. His face was immediately buried deep in her mounds and his tongue was already lapping their interior flesh. His hands were probing and feeling the resonance of their jiggle, almost as if he was performing seismic refraction tests on them. His thumbs were nibbling her nipples and mapping her areolas. And Fiona happily approved all of it.

"Oh yea, baby! That's so good! Come on, cover them all! Claim them!" Now she dropped her purse and joined in; she caught his short brown hair to place his lapping tongue on wherever an itch possessed her... and Donald was so grateful to comply. He kept moaning and exhaling furiously on her flesh and his loving vibrations excited her to no end. "Yea, baby! Yeaaaa!!! Don't stop! Don't ever stop!"

At that point, while she was still coherent, Fiona wished to add comfort on top of bliss. She started slowly walking backwards, playfully towing her tethered lover along. Donald, for his part, was solely focused on her twin peaks and their rosebud nipples; he had no situational awareness whatsoever. Thankfully, she quickly found his bed and trotted there in short order. She gladly laid on her back, now able to let herself be immersed solely in the ecstasy Donald was continuously providing. He seamlessly slithered on top of her and just kept feasting on her horns of plenty.

Fiona was beside herself. Some rational part of her knew she was with a man she had met at the low point of her life and had not seen for six years, on a bed she was using for the first time. But her heart clamored that she was finally home, in the care of her beloved savior. She was feeling good, she was feeling safe and, wonder of wonders, she was about to cum. Donald had pressed her melons together and was now biting both her nipples with rhythmic precision; the jolts of bliss were merging into an harmonic climax that was overpowering every fiber of her being.

"OhmyGod! Yes! YESSS!!! Don't stop!!! Baby that's sosoveryGOOD!!! Never stop! Never never never NE-VERRR!!! Yes! YESSS!!! YesyesyesyesYESSS!!! YEAAAAAAAARGH!"

Donald could feel her back arc upward and her muscles shiver. He could hear and feel her arms flailing violently at his bed. Fiona's voice cracked, raised shortly two octaves in pitch and then, she slumped down on the bed. Donald, however, had no intention of stopping, just as he had been ordered.

It was her velvety hands on his cheeks that finally signaled the conclusion of Donald's first mandate. Fiona raised his head so her gaze could meet his soft brown eyes. His face was flushed and he looked like a marathon runner at the finish line. But she was still hungry for him.

"Baby... my tits are burning up... they need to be quenched... quick... use your dick... cum on my tits... quickly... please!"

"Yes... Yes, right away! Oh Fiona... you're so amazing!" Donald was so excited he was almost tearing his pants away from his legs, under the watch of his giggling beloved. When his penis was finally free, hard as a rock and almost quivering under pressure, Fiona had a sparkle in her grey eyes, like she was admiring the most beautiful sight in the world.

"Donnie baby, you have a beautiful cock... please give it to my wet diddies. They want cum, baby... don't hold anything back and just cum on top of me!"

Donald felt his heart flutter. For one thing, he knew full well his penis was not a sight of awe: it was barely average in length but right now it did have a nice girth, with veins fully gorged. More to the point of this moment, he also knew full well feeding it to her bosoms was akin to hope that a sardine meal would stuff a tiger shark. But he refused to disappoint her and just hoped for the best.

He kneeled on top of her and aligned his cock with the cavern entrance Fiona had enthusiastically prepared for him. She whispered tender encouragement. "Come on, baby... it's gonna be great. I just know it... get it in there, please." Her eyes were moist and burning with lust at the same time.

Then came the contact between his glans and her canyon wet with saliva. It was a mixture of warmth and softness the likes of which Donald had never experienced before. "Oh myyyyy! Fiona this is just so beautiful and it feels so good! Oh... it's just... wooow!" And even the sight of their coupling, with his penis wholly disappearing inside her mounds, proved to be enthralling to Donald. He started his lovemaking, his penis now coated in saliva and copious amounts of seminal fluids. "Oh, Fiona! Your breasts are so perfect! Can I caress them some more, please?"

"Of course, baby! There's plenty of place for four hands on my diddies! Grab the top and play with them... oooh that feels good! Keep going, Donnie, yea... like that! Harder! Faster! Oh yeaHAAAA!"

They were quite a sight: she was holding up her breasts by the sides while Donald was merrily stuffing his shiny cock between them, not to mention kneading her large areolas and twisting her pebble-hard nipples. Both were coaching themselves in achieving bliss and reaching climax, both of their gaze filled with love and gratefulness.

"Baby, you're just too much... gonna cum... won't last... mmmh... sssoorrry."

"Don't be, Donnie... oh you feel so great on me! I want your cum! Don't hold it, baby... just cum on me, nowww pleaaaase!"

For sole answer, Fiona heard a moan and was surprised by a wetness suddenly tickling her chin. She gasped and could briefly see some spurts seep out of her cleavage before feeling the poodle of his spill between her mammaries.

Sated, both of them surrendered her breasts to the pull of gravity. Donald could now admire his handiwork on her chest and Fiona started to paint herself with his semen. This brought up another yearning in her, this one trampling over all her natural caution. She beckoned Donald, who was still on his knees straddling her, to action again.

"Donnie, please... pull down my panties and soothe my clit... it's burning for you, baby! You're just so fucking amazing!"

"By your command, my love." The tone was banter but Donald's first ever use of the L word in her presence just mesmerized Fiona. She swiftly removed her jumpsuit and left for him the thrill of the finale. Unfortunately, all of that magic was quite suddenly dispelled when Donald did indeed lower her panties and was now pondering what to do with a four-inch phallus. Her heart wailed in agony.

"Nooo! Not you too, baby! I beg you! Be true to your word, Donnie! Be good to meeheeee!" That rush of emotion was bringing her almost to tears and Donald was ceding to panic.

(Oh God, No! Poor baby! Come on Don! Do it!!!)

He gobbled up her sex in one fell swoop. To take his mind off of what he just did, Donald moved up his head to look at her. And seeing her grateful smile and loving eyes seemingly wedged in the valley between her mounds instantly won him over. Fiona saw him smile, with his mouth still full, before seeing nothing but brown hair and feeling his lips and tongue hug her shafted clit all over. Even more amazing to Fiona than the surges of pleasure washing all over her body, she soon realized that Donald just kept going at it. Her entire penis was comfortably lodged in his mouth and he seemed intent on smothering it with love... well... forever. And no part of her shaft or her glans were left dry or uncared for; Donald was both meticulous and relentless.

At one time during this oral tender loving care session, Donald got into his groove and reached for her balls, for added stimulation. That led to his second surprise in mere minutes: her scrotum felt like an empty sack of flesh. Startled, he removed his hand and placed it on more familiar ground, one of her glorious diddies. Comforted, he just kept on licking her shaft as if attempting to melt it to oblivion.

Fiona's brain, breasts and all of her other erogenous zones were being filled with pleasure from a part of her that is usually the object of scorn or disgust. She was amazed, totally immersed in her building climax and could do nothing but grunt and yell. Then it hit her. Her hands grabbed his hair and forcefully pulled his head down on her; she could feel his nose squished on her navel. Her hands were trembling and her scream was now silent due to lack of air in her lungs. Donald braced for her ejaculation.

(Don't flinch on her now, Don... just hold your breath and swallow! You can do this!)

But no semen was forthcoming. This new surprise actually caused him to briefly pause for the first time. He would definitely have questions for later. For now, however, seeing that Fiona had let go of his hair, was settling down and catching her breath while her strange clit was still very hard and comfortable in his mouth, Donald just... resumed his fellatio.

That very brief refractory period was the only time when Fiona could express her wonder. "Oh Donnie! I could have never dreamed! Even back then... you are so amazing! OoouuUU! And you aaHAAA! Keep oOOON! GoinnnGGG! Oh God yes don't stop! Don't! Don't! MmwaARGH! Oh yes! yes! yeES! YESSS!!!"

Donald was feeling tears trickling down his cheeks towards her crotch. He was living an epiphany with a person that, 80 hours ago, he was not even sure whether or not she was still alive. He had both his hands caressing tenderly the top of her breasts and his mouth still held her shaft captive and under loving torture. He was intent on only stopping when he ran out of saliva. And to hear her renewed screams and grunts of bliss excited him to heights he did not know existed within him. He already knew he would never leave her, come what may... his very soul had just been branded by her.

Fiona's second orgasm was much more intense; she had spasms on all her extremities and Donald was even feeling her legs fighting for freedom from under his weight. As soon as she was able, she finally begged him to stop. "HouHOOU! Baby stop! Hou! SensitiIIVE! STOOOP! Houuuuuu."

Donald was an adult bundle of joy. To tease her and gauge the impact of his loving, he softly blew his breath on her shaft.

The reaction was immediate. "mmmwwaaAAAAH!" And she burst in laughter while trying to shield herself from his cone of cold.

Her following reaction, however, was more elusive: as she was getting a hold on her breath and her heartbeat, she just looked up at the ceiling, still and pensive. "Thank you Donnie... you have no idea just how much I needed that. And I'm... sorry... that I grossed you out."

"Don't be ridiculous! I've just experienced the best sex of my entire life and I'm the one thanking you. Fiona, you are... so... wow... beyond anything I ever dreamed, or even fantasized about, for myself! I can't believe all this just happened... to me!"

"You don't have to act noble or shield me, Donnie... I'm almost used to it now... I saw your face when you recoiled after seeing my clit."

Before answering, Donald moved up over her head so his gaze could meet hers. "Fiona, I told you at dinner I will always be transparent and I am now. When I paused, honest to God, I had a huge flashback: I was thrown back six years ago and wondering why on Earth would the Volunteer Unit warn me about your age, your psych eval and then omit the LGBT clinic! I was startled and I truly never saw this coming. I'm sorry for the anguish my reaction caused you... I felt it straight to my heart."

Fiona's own heart fluttered and, quietly reassured, her head settled deeper on the pillow. "Donnie... I never was an LGBT patient..."

"But..."

"Donnie, just listen... intersex and gender dysphoria are two very different things. And now... you may ask me."

Donald sat on the bed and waited that Fiona, who instinctively caught on, did the same. "Fiona, do you want to talk about your health condition?" He held her hand and looked at her with pure benevolence. She nodded in assent.

"My mother had considerable difficulty getting pregnant, so when my parents were finally holding a small baby boy, they did not care about my undescended testes. Sadly for them, the following tests, especially the karyotyping, told a very different story. I am a 46,XX girl born with 21-hydroxylase congenital adrenal hyperplasia; and during gestation I was virilized at level 5 on the Prader scale. On top of that wallop, my parents were told I needed to stay in hospital care because I was soon expected to have life-threatening vomiting and diarrhea due to salt-wasting, which indeed occurred. Donnie, I have been on anti-androgens and different types of steroids ever since I was one month old. My childhood was a succession of long, awkward and difficult talks with my parents and therapists. Also, in the mid-90s, psychiatric and medical articles were published about sex assignment, surgery outcomes, rearing and testosterone impact in utero, so my parents..." she chocked up and took a deep breath, before resuming her obviously-prepared allocution "... my parents chose to postpone the surgical reconstruction of my... ambiguous vagina... until I could weigh in on the decision. It must have been hell for them; I recall overhearing private arguments about this during all my life at home."

Donald waited her out. She was clinching on his hand for support.

"Anyway, I made it alive to reach menarche, which is the next chapter in the story. Trust me on this, Donnie, bleeding your period through a peehole is an experience best left untold. But mom recognized a part of herself in my very irregular and almost-hemorrhagic menstrual cycle... and when an ultrasound test confirmed I had a truckload of cysts in my ovaries, I figured I had no future motherhood to save and chose a partial hysterectomy over a sex reconstruction for my fourteenth birthday gift. By the time we first met, I was still undergoing puberty, with prednisolone doses that had to be changed almost monthly, I was fat as a blimp with disgusting acne, I was being checked for body hair growth, my own growth was stunted and I was smelling like a football team locker room at half-time. I was so fed up by simply living that, at one time, I just... quit. Of course, since refusing my meds can be lethal to me in mere days, I was assigned to suicide watch while my mother cried non-stop and my dad sulked in a drunken haze. And that's when you showed up at my bed with a deck of cards... Donnie, you truly saved my life. You showed me that living with a permanent condition can be a life, not just a duty to alleviate the burden of your caretakers. And I knew you had opened your heart to me. I'm sorry I never got around to figure the impact of your age or of all that stuff in your life... I mean, it was always about me when we were together."

"As it was meant to be. It's funny, though, I don't recall you ever smelling like you claim..." Donald was caressing her hair with his other hand and Fiona saw in him nothing but acceptance and reassurance.

"One does not perspire a lot when in bed all day, smartass... but seriously, Donnie... be straight with me, you're not..."

"Fiona... darling... I don't pretend I understood 100% of your medical expose and I will make some private research to educate myself but... in essence... I thought I had just lived the most fabulous and uplifting sexual experience of my life with someone who is transitioning to be a woman, when in fact I am sitting with a sensational woman who happens to have her vagina connected to a penis and who produces testosterone. Really, I don't get where's the big deal." He was softly laughing at his own foolishness.

Fiona got in on the banter, utterly amazed. "Also, for the record, you're the one who showed me how to play Magic with blue-white, mister!"

"It seemed the obvious thing to do at the time... you liked angels... and I can sure relate to that... I'm looking at one."

"I still do... and I'm about to kiss one, you big romantic dope."

"Fiona..." Donald was wonderstruck and hesitant. In a weird way, the kiss that was implied, wanted and forbidden six years ago and that was about to happen now, was almost a bigger deal to Donald than their romp in bed. Seeing the want and nervous hope in Fiona's eyes, it seemed a shared emotion.

Fiona got closer and her lips reached his. She did not plant them, she did not press hard or invade his mouth with her tongue, she just hovered, as if asking permission. Donald gently pulled her head closer and he briefly saw her smile before closing his eyes. Their lips were gorged, soft and moist, her aroma was exotic and sweet, his hands were shivering with desire. They just stayed locked together in this first kiss, unaware of time, of place, of needs and wants. They just lived the magic in the present tinged with the bittersweet of what might have been.

Fiona was gasping for air when she ended the kiss and she felt her heart beating wildly. "Wow... Donnie... that was..."

"I love you, Fiona."

"I know... your kiss said it all... I'm blown away, Donnie! I mean... we were apart... and obviously both hurt... how can this be?"

"Judging by your reaction, I gather that, for you, it's more complicated?" Donald tried to remain steady, but he feared her next answer more than death.

"Not complicated... but... I guess I'm ambiguous."

"Because of Sandy?"

"San... oh dear God no! She did like almost all of my first-timers and freaked at the sight below my bust. But even the ones who stay turned on get over the novelty quickly... and I have a survival instinct that warns me you might just do the same, you know..."

"But Sandy had gotten you all hot and horny... so you came to me?" Donald was relaxing and did not mind needling her a bit.

"Hey! You were more than a booty call! THAT was more than a booty call! But... yeaa... guilty as charged." Even though she was slightly embarrassed, Fiona was not scared, as she felt the complicity they were rebuilding between them.

"So then... just how ambiguous are you about us? Are we talking James Bond and Pussy Galore?"

"Oh no... I'm not a lesbian, Donnie... I don't think I even consider myself Bi. But I do have needs and my batting average is markedly higher when women are pitching, that's for sure. About us... I don't know... I guess I still have to process all this. Am I disappointing you? Are you upset with me? Because I can leave if you want." Fiona sounded earnest but, in fact, she was terrified.

"Fiona, I am not letting you go again. You can obviously do what you want and leave if you wish... but if you think there is something between us, I would very much like for you to let me woo you. Let the flame become a fire if it can."

"Well, Donnie... I can certainly accept being wooed... and, in fact, I'm pretty sure I would like that; a lot."

Donald was relieved as if he had just avoided diabetic coma. In this instant, everything in the universe was magnificent. He kissed her forehead. "Good. Now, it is pretty late and I know nothing about your schedule. Do you want to rest, or talk? I could brew a coffee or tea, or pour you a beer, if you want."

"Tea would be good, Donnie."

---

To Donald, it seemed the alarm clock rang the very second he closed his eyes. Seeing Fiona crawl out of bed like a walking dead, he figured she was not much better off. They had spilled out all of their hearts' content until the crack of dawn, just like old times but without the limitation of his volunteer's schedule. Also a good sign for their future, according to Donald: Fiona had hogged the blankets and she had just called shotgun for the bathroom.

Donald finished his morning glucose check and the rest of his health ritual, then proceeded to brew two strong coffees and fix breakfast.

Fiona finally emerged, looking like a girlfriend and wearing one of Donald's shirt. Her lazy smile melted his heart. "Good morning, Donnie... mmm! That aroma is a stream of life and you are my angel of the morning." She kissed him on the cheek while graciously taking his offered coffee. "And what are you up to?"