All Comments on 'An August Rainy Day'

I would have rated you higher, but the story became hard to follow. You went from first-person past tense, to third-person past tense, to first-person present tense, and all without a hint of warning.<p>There will be those who complain about my comment, calling me picky. Sorry, but I was lost a couple of times, until I skipped back a few paragraphs to re-orient myself. That's just not the proper way to write.

...with GToast here, though I had to give you a higher mark for the direction of the story. The story has really great potential and if re-done and edited properly, in one tense instead of the three different ones represented, then it would get the absolute highest mark from me. But with the tenses getting so confusing and all that, it made it a little difficult to wrap my head around. Please, edit or find one of the excellent volunteers here to help and repost. I'd LOVE to read it again after! Good Luck :-)!