All Comments on 'An Innocent Peek'

It lacks the depth to be rated, but I find the premise interesting. The couple is enjoying some good sex through a little voyeurism. It may turn out the wife is the one he is watching through the window, which would be an interesting turn. If it wanders into multiple partners and all sorts of random sex, it will lose the feeling that its all possible. Mind games are often more erotic than everyone on the ranch fucking like monkeys. I am interested to see where you take this, but again, the very short chapter is a negative.

First off. Sydney knew she was giving a show. Good for you!

Telling his wife. That took balls.

I find it a leap from not to much sex or very many blowjobs to dirty talk/icall me Sydney was a reach. His wife is in great shape too? Alarm bells!!!!!!! Battle stations readers!

In real life there’s gonna be backlash even though the wife liked it. But it’s a story.

Hold your breath folks. This could anywhere!

🤘

I think most of us have been lucky enough at one time or another to have gotten an unexpected peek of someone when we least expected it. It's even better to have a wife understand and help to use that to spice things up. Nice read. Thank you.

"My wife moved forward, rolled over to show me her tites and spread her legs out around me. Her ti"

That is a paragraph?

Get an editor, or at least proof read your work. There are several mistakes.

Kind of short, no detail, or back story, but no all bad. Good effort.

to make us want to read the next parts.

" Tonight I need you to fuck my pussy and I want you to fuck it like you'd fuck Syd's."

Yeah, that's what every woman dreams of, being fucked as a surrogate for the woman her lover really wishes he were fucking, instead of her. You must be like, thirteen years old?

Its OK, we all have to go through puberty. When you grow up, if you fuck a woman stupid enough to encourage you to pretend you're fucking some other woman, tell her there is no woman, imagined or real, that you would rather be fucking and making love to at that moment than her. You will be rewarded.

For this story you will not be rewarded, its stupid.

Overall, a good story concept. You should consider slowing down some as you work. I see this story as a good framework to work from. If you take some time, let your story 'simmer in the fles. Return to it later and flesh it out more.

Ignore the anonymous comments. If they're too cowaerdly to sign the comment, the words mean nothing.

Told me what I would want to know about this piece.

Great story! My wife and I had a good time sharing it with each other. All those other people who made comments are full of crap and themselves (same thing really). Are you a professional writer? Likely not, nor are you getting paid for your work. THANK YOU for sharing a story people like my wife and myself could enjoy and DO NOT let the editor police discourage you! (Hey you commenters out there... spelling, grammar, punctuation errors on my note? I don't care. As long as the author gets my positive message!)