Ann: A Love Story Ch. 13

That was a point I made to my him on the way to the golf course. We left my car and he drove us east of town, about 5 miles, to our home course.

"You're right, Neil. I should have told you."

"I'm just saying, Dad. If I ever hope to become salary, you have to let me in on these kinds of things. It makes me look irresponsible, and I'm anything but."

"I know that," he said, defending himself.

"Sometimes you do. But you really don't know what it's like going through life at work as Darren's boy."

"It can't be all that bad, can it?"

"Not all the time. But when things happen that could have been controlled, and they just aren't, it really shows. Half the plant thinks I've gotten everything because of you. I have to work twice as hard as the next guy just to be seen as equal."

"What are you saying?" he asked.

"Look, Dad. I'm appreciative of everything you've done for me. And what you haven't done for me. I've learned more from watching you than I did in four years at college. But you have to face it; you cast a really large shadow for a guy that's only 5'8"."

Dad cracked up at that. I felt fortunate that I'd gotten my height from my Mom's side of the family. Being 6 feet, I knew I got the lucky side of the gene pool there. But I got Dad's athletic abilities, so it was the best of both worlds as far as I was concerned.

We got to the golf course a half hour before our tee time, which gave me plenty of time to warm up. Mack and Rob were already on the putting green, no doubt strategizing on how they were going to try to get to me, and what they might try to do to win against Dad and myself. It was always great fun to play with them. They both had a great sense of humor, and were a lot of laughs on and off the course.

I got ready and grabbed my stuff, and we headed down to the green, where we greeted each other. I threw down some balls and took a few practice putts, and knew early on that I felt good. I had good hands that afternoon, and could feel the ball coming off the putter face through the shaft. When I felt that kind of touch early on, I usually played very well. I carried a 10 handicap at the time, and knew it would be lower if I played more often. Between feeling in control, and the fact that I knew the course so well, I had a lot of confidence going in. Clearly, Mack knew that, and so he started early on me, trying to get in my head before we even made it to the first tee.

"So, I hear you have a new girlfriend," he said as I was putting my bag on a cart.

I knew my Dad wouldn't have said anything to either Mack or Rob, not wanting to give them any ammunition to use against me, and thus, against us in the match. But Mom wouldn't have known about that, or cared. She likely told Carrie and Paula when they showed up at the house. And why not? So, since it was likely Rob knew too, I steeled myself for eighteen holes of their using Ann as a weapon.

I smiled and said "If that's what you want to call her, that's fine with me." I could have said something about her leaving for California, but I didn't want to think about that. I was still in a great mood, and I wasn't going to let Mack or Rob affect that. Or my game, if I could help it.

"Would you rather we call her something else? Lover, perhaps?" Rob chimed in.

My Dad's ears perked up, but not in the way you would think. I had golfed with these guys for years, and pretty much, there was nothing off limits for us to talk about on the golf course; sex included. I had a pretty open dialog with my Dad anyway, and it was no secret that he and my Mom were still very sexually active. I learned a lot about that on the course, and in some cases, more than I needed to know. He wasn't listening to defend me, though. He wanted to know what I'd been up to with Ann.

I hadn't decided just how forthcoming I was willing to be. I always played it closer to the vest than the other three, because my Dad was there. But I wasn't a virgin, and they all knew that. There were a couple of times I probably shared too much, particularly about sexual escapades involving the ex. I knew I needed to tread very carefully, and I started by deflecting their choice of ammo.

"No. My lover would be Dawn."

"Dawn? What's the name of the girl that's coming to the cookout? I thought Carrie said her name was Ann?" Mack asked.

"It is," I said grinning.

"Who the hell is Dawn?" Rob and my Dad said in unison.

"She's a girl I met last weekend in Ann Arbor. We played softball together."

"Sounds like you did more than play softball if you're calling her your lover," Mack said, stating the obvious.

"Very astute, Mack. Good to see you brought your brain with you today. Did you bring your wallet too...because you're going to need it," I said as I pulled out my driver and started swinging to warm up my back and shoulders.

Rob cracked up, but Dad was still stuck on Dawn.

"So, Ann isn't the reason you've been in such a great mood lately?"

"I never said that. I simply said that I was with Dawn over the weekend."

"So, you've got two girls you've been banging?" Rob asked.

"Whoa! Let's not get crude. I don't want Ann lumped in that kind of category. You can call her my girlfriend. I'm totally okay with that. But let's be careful how we're talking, at least about her, okay!"

I got ticked off a little, and Rob backed off. Here was a guy my Dad's age and I'd just ripped into him. But I didn't care. I was defending her honor.

"He didn't mean anything by that, did you Rob?" Mack said, trying to lighten the mood.

Mack stumbled into an apology, saying "I'm sorry, Neil. I didn't mean to say it that way. I was just a little shocked that you've had sex with two different girls in the last week."

"Well, first of all, they're all women. And it's five."

"FIVE!" Dad said, his mouth falling open.

"What can I say? I had a busy weekend," I said, trying to distance Ann from the rest of the pack. In actuality, it WAS five, but only three were on the weekend. Ann and Nancy happened after I got back.

"You've fucked five different women in the last week?" Mack asked.

"No, three. Two I just had sex with," I said with a smile.

"What's the difference?" Rob asked.

"Wow. Really, Rob? There ARE other ways to have sex. Do you need some pointers? Hey, instead of that, if you need me to help you out with Paula, let me know."

"Neil!" Dad snapped, trying to reprimand me.

"Hey, I didn't start this conversation. But it's not like you've never talked about nailing Paula when we're in this little group; or Carrie for that matter. The only one of you that hasn't talked about another's wife is Rob about Carrie, and that's because they're brother and sister. And I know I heard Rob and Mack comment on my slut of an ex wife more than once. I'm surprised she didn't fuck them, actually. She seems to do that a lot."

"Well, I'm sorry if we offended you. We were just being guys," Rob said.

"You didn't offend me. But I'm a guy too. I just don't see why the shoe only fits on the one foot because I'm his son," I said pointing at my Dad. "Just because Paula is older that me doesn't mean I wouldn't consider fucking her if she wasn't someone I knew, and wasn't your wife. She's hot!"

"Neil, you're crossing into a bad territory here. I don't think you should be talking like that about Paula. She's too old for you," Mack said.

"Funny, she's too old for me, but my ex wasn't too young for any of you guys to lust over. I find that just a tad hypocritical. Besides, Denise didn't think being older was such a big deal when I was with her."

"Who's Denise?" Dad asked, his face contorted, as he feared my answer.

"She's one of the women I was with over the weekend. She's 48, or something like that."

"You slept with a 48 year old woman?" Mack said, shocked.

"Well, in my defense, she doesn't look 48. Honest to God, she could pass for my age. I would have never guessed she was that old."

"Oh, so you didn't know until afterwards," Dad said, trying to explain away his disbelief...or his disgust. I wasn't really sure.

"Sure. If that's what you want to believe. But the truth is, no...I knew before. And it didn't matter. I wasn't marrying her. It was sex."

"So she's one of the ones you didn't fuck," Mack asked.

The whole conversation was now so totally away from Ann that it was ridiculous. I had wanted to deflect the conversation from her, but now I wished it was all about her. I would have preferred that to rehashing all the other things I'd done. But, as with all the women I'd referenced, I had made my bed, and now I was lying in it with them. My thoughts now were turning this back toward Ann. I didn't want to go into the cookout with them looking at her like just another piece of ass, because she wasn't.

"No, I fucked Denise. And I'd contend that if the circumstances were the same, any of you would have too. She was amazing!"

"Neil, I don't know what to think about all this. It's not like you to act like that," Dad said, giving me his 'disappointed' face.

"Please don't judge me, Dad. I didn't hurt anybody. You yourself said that you're glad to have me back to being me."

"Well, that's when I thought it was because of Ann." I shot him a look, and he knew, that second, that it was because of Ann. But he was still puzzled. "Then what's all this stuff about the other women?"

"That was a weekend. Look, if it weren't for Dawn, there would be no Ann. I wouldn't have spent the week hanging out with her, because I wasn't in the right frame of mind, and Ann wouldn't have wanted to be with that guy in the first place. The bitch pretty much killed my spirit, and Dawn gave that back to me. But she was just my lover for the weekend. Nothing more."

"What about the other three?" Rob asked, not wanting to change the direction of the conversation.

"What about them? If Ann doesn't care about them, why should you?"

"Ann knows?" Dad asked.

"Of course she does. The last thing I'm going to do is keep secrets from my girlfriend."

"So, she is your girlfriend?" Rob asked.

"For this week, yeah. And she doesn't care about my past, including the weekend. She's thankful Dawn and I hooked up, because she knows this week has all happened because of that. It is what it is, guys. And I have to tell you, it's refreshing to be with a woman who gets that, even if it is only for a week."

I felt good about how I ended that. I'd gotten lost in the moment and spilled too much. So much for playing it close to the vest! But at least the focus was back on Ann, which seemed so right. Maybe I wanted to get it all out; at least most of it. There was no way I wasn't bringing up Nancy.

After what seemed like forever, we finally teed off. They kind of let the subject drop, but the mood from the conversation still ran through the group. It took a few holes, with me winning all three, for Mack and Rob to come to the realization that they needed to press me on Ann some more.

We were playing best ball, so between Dad and I, one of us needed a better score on a hole than the best score that either Mack or Rob had. If one of us tied their best score, we tied as a team. I had two pars, and I birdied the third hole. Rob and Mack both bogeyed the first two holes, and Rob parred the second, but my birdie beat him and Mack.

Down three holes after only playing three, Rob was the first to take a jab, and said, "So, is Ann as hot a piece of ass as your ex was?"

Now, normally I would have done a double take, and I might have gotten pissed. Using the ex in our little game was hitting below the belt. But I was on top of my game in more ways than one, so it didn't really bother me. The fourth hole is a short, downhill par three with a creek to the back. I hit a wedge to within 15 feet and turned back to Rob.

"That depends. She's not runway model stunning like the bitch was, but she's more beautiful."

"Oh...she's a 'pretty on the inside' kind of girl," he said kidding.

"Well, she is pretty on the inside but Ann is very pretty, period. In fact, she's gorgeous. What makes her so amazing is that she's this wholesome, Midwestern girl next door, who moved to California and became a woman. She blossomed."

"So, she went out at got some big tits?" Mack said with a laugh.

"No, thank God. She's probably a 34 B, but they sit so perfectly on her body, and as thin as she is, they look huge. They work for her, and for me. Besides, I'm an ass man, and Ann's ass is amazing!"

"I'm an ass man too," Rob said, trying to imply that he'd be checking Ann out when he met her.

He was just getting ready to hit, when I said, "Sometimes you're just an ass, Rob. But hey, that's great that you think of yourself as an ass man too. Maybe while you check out Ann's ass tonight, I'll find a way to get Paula to bend over in front of me. She's got a nice tight ass too."

Rob jerked his head, and hit a low, wicked slice that screamed over the green and splashed in the creek. He groaned out loud and turned to me. I just smiled, and held out my hand. Dad, standing next to me, gave me a low five, along with a deep little laugh.

Mack stood on the tee, and waited forever. Dad finally asked him if he was ever going to hit.

"I'm waiting to see if Neil was going to make some comment about Carrie."

"Nah. You guys have already got one in the water. That should be good enough," I said

He lined up his shot, and when he started his backswing, Dad said, "But if he did, he'd talk about those huge tits!" Mack pull hooked his shot over the green, and it skipped off the back fringe and bounced into the creek. Dad held out his hand, and I gave him five back. It was one of the first times I could remember that we'd totally beaten them at their own game. And a big part of that was the fact that I was on the offensive for the first time that I could remember.

I made an easy par, and we headed for the next hole. Mack and Rob upped their game, trying to think of anything they could to get too me. It didn't help them that they didn't know Ann, so they couldn't get too personal, and they were unwilling to bring up the ex again, knowing not to cross that line. They didn't want good natured fun to become ugly, and I appreciated that.

I took some hits, but never wavered in my demeanor or my game. I would counter attack, mentioning Carrie's huge chest or Paula's nice ass. Rob was getting used to the comments about Paula. But Mack was having trouble with me talking about Carrie like I was. When I said something about him wearing out her big tits fucking them, he actually turned red.

"I think you struck a nerve," my Dad said with a laugh.

Things calmed down the rest of the front nine, and Dad and I won that half of the match pretty easily. We were winning the second half of the bet on the back nine, and Mack talked Rob into pressing us, which meant there would be a third bet on the last few holes so they could try and recoup the money they were losing.

No matter what Mack or Rob tried with me, it didn't work. On the 17th tee, after another attempt by both of my opponents to rattle me before I hit my drive, I laced a low hook around the bend of a dogleg left, and walked off the tee with a smile.

"Darren, I think Neil is really serious about this girl," Rob said.

Mack nodded and said, "Me too. I've never seen him like this. Every time we mention Ann, he only hits it straighter and farther."

"That one wasn't straight. He hit a draw...but I get your point," my Dad said laugh.

I smiled. Ann did seem to bring out the best in me, in a lot of different areas. The golf was a bit of an unexpected result, but there was something to what they were saying. While Dawn gave me the confidence to be me again, Ann gave me an inner peace. She helped me feel calm and secure. It was a quiet courage, resolved in the sensibility she provided me.

As I stood there in the bright afternoon sunshine on a brilliant Indiana summer day, I reflecting on just exactly what it was about Ann that brought out the new sensations I was experiencing. When it came down to being totally honest with myself and what I thought was really at the root of what was causing my new outlook, it could only be love. What else could it be? That was how Ann made me feel...loved.

I was serious about Ann. But I felt like my hands were tied by the circumstances that life had presented me. I was confident, but I was still skeptical. Not of Ann, and how she felt about me, or how I felt about her. I was just stuck in the perception that we were two souls from different parts of the country, who were lucky enough to have fate bring us together for a brief, but amazing week together.

We finished off the round, with Dad and me taking both sides of the bet, and the press. I walked off the eighteenth green forty dollars richer. Mack and Rob were good natured about it, but that was the most they had ever lost to us. I felt a little bad, just a little, but I also felt really good about how the guys looked at me when were were done. I felt respected by them for the first time, not for being Darren's boy, but for being my own man.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Mack and Rob headed to my parents house after the match. Dad drove me back to the plant to get my car. The ride was silent at first. I felt awkward, having said a lot of things that I didn't regret, but wasn't sure how they would be viewed by Dad in private. Having never crossed the lines I'd leaped over with both feet, I didn't know what to expect. I'd always kept to myself the things that were said on the golf course amongst that group. But as the one that had ventured so far out of character, I wasn't sure what to expect in return.

Dad finally spoke up as we reached the edge of town, saying, "You really surprised me today, Neil."

"I'm afraid to ask what about," I said, staring at the floor of the car.

He reached over and patted me on my thigh. It was that loving gesture he'd done ever since I was a little boy, to let me know he loved me and was proud of me. I never had an issue telling either of my parents I loved them, and they were quick to let me know the same. Unlike a lot of fathers, mine had no problem saying it to me. But when he would pat me on the thigh, it was always made me feel special, like I was hearing him say it to me for the first time.

"Well, I did learn some things. But I want you to know I'm not judging what you did over your weekend. It obviously did you a lot of good, and like you said, you didn't hurt anybody."

I nodded, but continued to stare at the floor. Dad glanced over at me and gave me a little smile.

"I'm proud of you, Neil. That's the first time you've ever given it to those two as good as they've given you. Actually, you gave it better than them today. I know this may sound strange, but you acted like a man today. You weren't my son. You were an equal, not only in my eyes, but in theirs. When you defended Ann by standing up to Rob, I had a chill run down my spine. I know it made Rob blink."

"I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean to sound so angry."

"Don't be. He had it coming. And it certainly set the stage for an interesting evening. For you to say what you said, I can't wait to meet your...girlfriend." "I'm a little nervous for her. I don't think she knows what she's getting into tonight."

"Then tell her. You're the one who said you weren't keeping secrets."

~*~*~*~*~*~

Dad was right, as usual. He dropped me off, and I followed him home so I could take a quick shower. That quick shower turned into a longer one, as I became lost in thought. I was struggling with the concept of love; the reality of what was happening, versus the fantasy of how I wished things could be. And I was working out in my head how to tell Ann what had happened on the golf course.

Caught up in my thoughts, I had forgotten that we would be having company. Rob and Mack had not come straight home from the golf course, and when Dad and I pulled in, Mom was gone, so the house was empty. It seemed like any other Friday, and since Dad was in his room taking his own shower, when I walked into mine, it never occurred to me that it wasn't just another start to a weekend.