All Comments on 'Anna Goes to Camp'

One of the best stories ever, loved it!!!

Overall, not a bad story. But if you are going to write about things, know what you are writing about. You do not row a canoe with an oar! You paddle a canoe with a paddle. Those kind of things throw a reader...

I was so close to climax then I lost the moment, due to the absurdity of paddling a canoe with an oar.

I liked your story, but you need to work on the sex scenes. Be more describetive. I mean no offence, but your scenes were little more than "and then they had sex, it was awesome". Try to describe their actions, how the characters feel, both physically and emotionally during their sex.

Great story. Sex scenes were perfect. Rowing or paddle .......Not important to the story. I am sure Chapter 2 would be just as good it you chose to write it. Thanks.

you kept talking about her red hair, we already knew about her red hair the first time you told it, I didn't think you needed to keep reminding the reader about it. you didn't say anything about the color of her pink nipples or color of her pale skin or if she had freckles or the green eyes like most redheads do,but, still it was a good read. :)

Yes way more detail in the sex scenes,

Is it really possible that so many such good friends are so completely comfortable with sex and their own sexuality? They just spend their days and nights enjoying each other's company in innumerable ways and activities. I can only fantasize at how much fun that would be. I just wish I had had such sexually close friends (and family) when I was a teenager. It makes me wonder what we would have been like as we got older... Probably just incredibly sexually close old friends and family.

i hope they al go to the cabin real soon.

Paddle or ore, who cares? There was plenty of sex but nothing else, no buildup, no mystery, no suspense. I have read much better from you. Try getting an editor. Sorry, but I gave up after page 3.

Terra

Please write another story starting from the moment that Anna unzips her dad's pants.

Good storyline & l enjoyed it.

But I kept getting distracted y rowing a canoe with oars.

You paddle a canoe with paddles. Rowing is done in a rowboat, not a canoe!

Distracting!

Bill S.

Needs proofreading - Canoes don't have oars they have paddles - Past tense for grind is ground not grinded - Never did get around to fucking her dad . . . .