All Comments on 'Anna, My Girlfriend'

This story really and truly sucked and I am sure all the oyhers following it will too. Why the hell would somebody write a teaser so short? Do you have no imagination.

You need to finish what you start, and you are off to a good start. Try to use some descriptions that aid the reader with some visualization, and then try to take each portion of your story to some sort of conclusion. You have a good start, but you did not have a good finish. Take your time and step through the process of them making love in your mind and then write what you see happening, realize that while you were there and experienced it, the reader did not. What did she smell like? what was she wearing? how did she look at you? What did she do after you decided to watch the movie? Answer some of those questions and you will get further with you story line.

Don't worry about the comments to much, some of the people that come here just want a quick wank, and don't have patience for such a story! Please continue writing, I enjoyed it a lot and I'm waiting for the next chapter!

Hey, no problem with the story, the content, the pace, or the grammar (just a few little errors thats all)

As a scene-setter. I hope the rest of it continues in this vein! Keep it up!! Looking forward to Part 2

This is a good beginning. Your scene setting and initial character development are excellent. The grammar and sentence construction are good but need some improvement. (I’ve seen a worse work from native English (UK or America) speakers.)

...that he has no right to comment if he can't spell a word as simple as '...OTHER...' correctly.