All Comments on 'Another Night, Another Intruder'
by chitrashi
- 6 Comments
perl10about 13 years agoWhat you lack in writing skills, you more than make up in enthusiasm. You're missing the mark on what it means to be a submissive, but if you keep writing, I'm sure you'll get there.
Anonymousabout 13 years ago"It took me a second to get his bearings right, and then I was in the bedroom."
Really?
It took ME to get HIS bearings right?
chitrashiabout 13 years agoAuthorOuch sorry about that typo. I had initially begun the story from only one POV. I guess converting to dual narrative got me.
Anonymousabout 13 years agoGood basic premise and reasonably plausible. The only bit that I did not like was the ten inch dick. If you want the reader to get involved please use an average size dick. Just like mine! Keep writing.
Anonymousabout 12 years agoI agree, a good start. But I suggest either post a sequel or alter the ending - it didn't quite satisfy me. Just some friendly advice and request :)
chitrashi@chitrashi
