All Comments on 'As It Seems Ch. 01'

really liked it and nice cliff hanger can't wait to read the following chapters

It seems as if this could turn out to be a pretty good story, but it really looks like you need an editor. There were so many errors, I could barely read around them to finish the story and not be completely confused, and I'm not talking dialect either. I applaud your attempt to write the dialog as it would be spoken by Macky, DJ, and Conner, but apart from that, the story is a MESS. Get an editor. An editor could help with a lot of the things that I noticed and could make your story much better in the long run.

Seems to have a good storyline. You need an editor though because the mistakes can be distracting. Other than that, it was pretty good! Keep writing!

but like previous posters said you an editor. The grammatical mistakes can be distracting and turn a reader off. Good story line so far.

Good start, but the overuse of foul language is distracting

I didn't notice a lot of errors, but maybe that was because the story was so engaging. Anyways, the foul language doesn't bother me... lol... I mean that's how some people actually talk. Going to read the next chapter! :-) Keep up the good work and thanks for sharing.

good start to this..cant wait to see where it goes..

Can not wait to read more!