Because I Still Love You Ch. 03

'So you think I am amazing in bed?' grinned Ken, his ego boosting a lot higher. 'Really?'

Lea tried to stop blushing as she mentally chided herself for blurting out the compliment.

'Ok,' said Ken as he knew that he couldn't coerce Lea out of this arrangement. 'Deal!' he said as he extended his hand towards her.

'Deal!' she said as she shook his hand and flashed him a cute smile.

***

'Our room or the guest room?' asked Ken as he closed the front door soundlessly behind him.

'I am not sleeping with you,' whispered Lea shooting daggers at Ken.

'I won't let you sleep alone,' said Ken as before Lea could protest, he added. 'Let me just hold you. I know you won't be able to sleep alone.'

'Your room, then,' said Lea as they walked towards the bedroom.

'That's my girl,' said Ken as he walked behind her.

'Wanna change into something more casual?' asked Ken as they walked into the bedroom.

'If you can lend me one of your shirts,' said Lea as she looked at him.

'Fine,' said Ken shaking his head and walked into the closet and retrieved one of his shirt. 'Will this do?' he asked.

'Yes,' she said and jumped into the bathroom to change.

'I will be waiting,' said Ken as he shrugged out of his clothes, except for his briefs.

He pulled back the covers and climbed into the bed and waited for Lea. A few seconds later, Lea crept onto her side of the bed and pulled back the covers, curling onto her side. Ken looked at her, sleeping far away and he pulled her close to his body.

'Ken?' whispered Lea as she rolled onto her back. 'I won't ...'

'I know. But you were sleeping too far away,' said Ken as he placed a kiss on her forehead and pulled her against his chest. 'I want you here, Lea ... more than anything else,' said Ken as he absorbed the feel of her in his arms.

'Thank you,' said Lea, pressing into his hard, lean body.

'Go to sleep,' he ordered as he stroked her hair.

'Good night,' mumbled Lea and she closed her eyes.

Ken looked down at Lea ... she seemed to be happy and peaceful. He ran his finger over her lower lip, making her curl into him further. For a brief second, he thought that maybe she would wake up but Lea was out like a light.

'I love you,' whispered Ken as he held her close.

***

'Ken, wake up ...,' screamed Lea as she shook Ken's shoulder. 'Get up, Ken ...'

'What happened? ... Why?' asked Ken as he got up disoriented at first.

'Many many happy returns of the day, baby,' said Lea as she hugged him tight.

It took a moment for Ken to actually process what she had said. By the time, he could respond, Lea pulled back and scampered off the bed.

'Thanks but where are you going?' asked Ken as he looked at his wife, who seemed to be busy searching for something.

'Just a minute,' she said over her shoulder as she found the box, deep inside the closet.

'Come over here, Lea,' said Ken as Lea seemed to be taking forever.

'Patience, Ken,' said Lea as she tore open the box and carried the package to the bed. 'Open it,' said an excited Lea as she settled down beside Ken.

'Later,' said Ken as he pushed the packet away and pulled Lea into his arms. 'Thank you,' murmured Ken against her lips as he claimed her mouth for a slow, deep eating kiss.

He pulled back when they were almost out of breath. His brown eyes had almost turned black with need and Lea seemed to be as effected as he.

'Wow, that was something,' said Lea as she touched her swollen lips. 'Anyways, time for my gift,' said Lea as she thrust the box between them.

Ken eyes the box inquisitively as he unwrapped it. He shook the box but there was no sound. Ken looked at Lea who seemed to be waiting for Ken's reaction. As the wrap came away, Ken opened the box and peered into it.

'How did you know I wanted this?' asked Ken as he looked at the first and oldest edition of his favorite Motor Trend magazine.

'You spend half of your time on the internet searching for it. I know, alright,' said Lea as she pushed his hair back from his forehead. 'I came across an auction in New York and I bought it for you.'

Ken caught Lea's hand and brought it to his lips, placing a brief kiss on her knuckles. 'Thank you,' he whispered, earnestly.

'You still haven't gone through the entire Pandora's box,' chuckled Lea as she indicated the box sitting between them. 'There is more to come.'

Ken looked into the box and found a photo album, a greeting card, a box of chocolates and a bottle of red wine.

'Come here,' said Ken as he pulled Lea into his side and opened the photo album.

The photo album contained the photos which Ken had never seen till date. Ken didn't even know when they were taken. They were the most bizarre pictures that he had ever seen. It was random and each picture had a unique tagline which Lea had scribbled in ink.

'When did you take all these photos?' asked Ken as he looked at the photo of him, sleeping on a couch in her New York apartment.

'I had been planning for a photo album since the day we met. So, whenever I got a chance, I clicked one,' she said as she ran her finger over a picture of them, together near a fountain.

They were smiling at something Lea had remarked and they looked happy, carefree and in love ... Lea pulled away from Ken as the last thought ran through her mind.

'Hey, don't think,' said Ken, immediately sensing Lea's withdrawal. He pulled her close and dropped a kiss on her forehead. 'Don't make this look like a parting gift. We will always have fun like the old times.'

'We will?' asked Lea, raising her head and looking into his eyes, hope glimmering in her heart.

'Yes,' said Ken and added, 'I will make sure that we do.'

'You didn't see the card,' said Lea as she thrust the card into his hands.

'Ok, Mrs. Harper,' said Ken as he looked at the card in his hands. 'To the most handsome guy in my world ...' he read out. 'Not bad,' he grinned and tweaked her nose.

'See inside,' whispered Lea as she flipped open the card. A small letter fell into his lap as soon as he opened the card. The more he started to read, the more his heart started pounding.

"Dear Ken,

I don't know how you would react to this letter. Things haven't been the same between us since the day you walked out of the apartment in NY. I couldn't stay there anymore. Everything reminded me of your presence. I resigned from the job after a couple of days. I packed my bags and came here ... but I didn't realize that you wouldn't acknowledge my presence. The formal conversations, the act of smiling just for the sake of it, the awkward silences between us, and the inability to look into each other's eyes ... You hold me close when we dance but it takes all of my self-control not to press myself closer to you. I miss the closeness that we once shared together. I hate it, Ken... This isn't why I came here and it isn't the way we used to be around each other.

I miss the Ken I fell in love with. I proposed not to sleep with you because I didn't want you to think that all I want is getting into the sack. There has always been more in this relationship that just sleeping together. I am still your Lea -- the Lea with whom you shared almost anything and everything. I know that you love me because I still love you and I always will. Maybe things aren't so good between us but we can work them out ... I want you, Ken, more than anything else. Because life without you has no meaning and you are the only one who can love me and make me smile, like nobody else can.

I am sorry if you hate me after this letter. But you deserve to know the truth ... the truth which I can never voice. I don't have the courage to look into your eyes and speak my heart out because to see hatred in the eyes which were always filled with love, is too much to bear. I didn't mean to ruin your birthday. But I couldn't stew over how far we have grown apart. You have a right to know how I feel and forgive me, if you are offended by my choice of words.

Many many happy returns of the day ... Happy Birthday, Mr. Harper. I have a lot planned for today. So, try not to sulk. I love you, Ken ... more than you can imagine."

***

By the time Ken finished reading whatever Lea had penned down, she had moved away from him and was standing near the window, looking at the twinkling stars. After reading the letter, he glanced at her profile with a different angle. He now realized why she had asked him to go on a date with him. The smiles which she had offered to him were all fake. But she still had managed to put up a brave front even when her heart was breaking into pieces. He studied her face -- she looked lost, frightened and sad and it pained him to see her in such a state. He got up and walked towards her. He stood behind her and looped his hands around her waist, drawing her close.

She gasped as she felt Ken's presence behind her. She felt Ken's hot breath brush against her ear. Being so close to him, made her entire body tingle ... She tried to move away, but Ken held her close, not wanting to let her go, after all that he had read.

'I love you,' he whispered and slowly turned her so that she faced him. He placed a finger under her chin and lifted it, looking into her eyes. Her sparkling eyes had become dull and they spoke a million things ... things which Lea didn't want to voice. He bent and allowed his lips to touch hers for a few seconds, before he snaked his hand behind her neck and angled her mouth, so that he could kiss her, making sure she realized how much he loved her and how much he missed her. His tongue ate at hers ... meeting, teasing and then scorching it with heat. Ken groaned when he felt her tongue lick his, equally eager to taste him. She tasted sweet, soft and just like his Lea. Ken pulled back, not wanting to, but he knew that both of both were short of breath.

Lea looked away, not wanting to meet his gaze. She was not sure what Ken would make of her. The letter contained all her pent up emotions and she didn't know how he would react If he didn't like her being so upfront ...

'I will kill you if you don't stop thinking,' said Ken curtly as he pulled her into his arms. 'What's wrong, baby?' asked Ken as he ran his thumb over her cheek.

'Nothing,' said Lea and looked away. Before Ken could question her further, she tried to get out of his hold but Ken had a death like grip on her.

'Stop moving away,' thundered Ken as he dropped a flurry of short, soft and sweet kisses on her face. 'Thank you for the card and the letter,' he whispered between the kisses.

'You are welcome,' she said, too flushed to answer anything else.

'Why didn't you talk to me about how you felt?' asked Ken as he walked towards the armchair and sat down, before pulling Lea into his lap.

'I didn't know ... I didn't know how to make you understand ...,' faltered Lea unable to voice to her feelings.

'Do you hate me?' asked Ken as he ran his hands over her arms, trying to soothe her frayed nerves.

'No, I will never hate you, Ken,' whispered Lea as she looked into his eyes, losing herself in the love that she saw.

'I am sorry, Lea. I am sorry I shouted and said stupid things. I wish I could undo the past,' said Ken as he squeezed her hand and pressed a kiss on her forehead.

'I deserved it, Ken. I ...'

'Shh ... don't say that,' whispered Ken as he silenced her. 'You didn't deserve such treatment. I am so sorry. I promise I will make it up to you,' said Ken as he kissed her knuckles.

'Can I sleep?' asked Lea as she laid her head against his shoulder. 'I am too sleepy,' she mumbled.

'Shall we go back to bed or ...?' Ken allowed the question to hang in the air.

'Let's sleep here,' answered Lea as she looped her arms around his neck. 'I like being this close to you.'

'Just a second, baby,' said Ken grabbing a sheet from the bed and draped it over them. 'Comfortable?'

'Hmm ...,' whispered Lea as she brought his hand and wrapped it around her. 'Hold me,' and with that she drifted into sleep.

Ken repositioned her, making sure that she was comfortable. Her head was on his shoulder and he tucked the wild strands on her hair behind her ear with a sweep of his hand. She was still a tiny thing. He still remembered the night in Texas when he had rushed to her house when she had a nightmare. He had held her in the same way, whispering sweet nothings and that night had changed his life completely. That night she had opened up to him, told him everything about her childhood. It evoked an immediate urge in him to protect, love and cherish her even more. He stroked her back and cradled her close to his heart. His Lea ... and he wasn't going to let her go anytime soon.

***

'I am sorry,' said Lea apologetically as she walked towards him, closing the front door behind her.

'Why?' asked Ken as he looked at her, 'For throwing a surprise party or for smearing the cake all over me?' he asked cocking his head to his side.

'For making you sleep on the armchair with me on top of you,' whispered Lea as she looked at him. 'I didn't mean to ...'

Before she could complete, Ken walked towards her and silenced her with a finger. 'Shh ... You don't know how nice I felt having you where I wanted you to be, completely surrounded by me and surrendering to my touch. Don't apologize and ruin my happiness, sweetie.'

'I like it when you call me that,' admitted Lea as she raised her head and looked into his eyes, which shone with love.

'I know,' he smiled slyly as he placed a kiss on the tip of her nose. 'And that's why I use it frequently or rather, used it frequently.'

'I have still one last gift for you,' said Lea as she took hold of his hand and dragged him into their bedroom.

'Lea ...,' sighed Ken as he walked into the bedroom and pulled Lea into his arms. He brushed her lips with his and said, 'I don't want any more gifts, baby. Let's get into the bed and ...'

'I won't sleep with you,' said Lea curtly.

Ken grinned and ran his finger over her lips, enjoying the feel of her soft lips beneath his calloused fingers. 'Ok, don't sleep with me. But let me just hold you ... Come on, it's my birthday, Lea ... You want to be happy, right?' asked Ken, knowing very well that Lea would succumb to his plea.

Lea knew that Ken was trying to emotionally blackmail her. But to be in his arms was a temptation which she couldn't resist.

'Fine,' she said and pulled back the covers, waiting for Ken to join her. He lost no time in losing his clothes, except for his boxers. As she began to remove her T-shirt, Ken reached to her side and helped her undress, leaving her in her sexy underwear. He whistled as soon as the lacy, black bra bobbed into his view.

Lea looked at him sharply and he shrugged and replied, 'I am just a guy, baby. I can't help it.'

He walked to his side of the bed and climbed in. He pulled Lea into his arms and ran his finger over her face, before cupping her face for a scorching kiss. As soon as he pulled back a little, Lea pushed him, making him reel back a little.

'What the hell, Ken?' she screamed.

'Come on, I didn't promise that I won't kiss you,' he grinned, making her even more angry.

Ken tried to pull her back into his arms but she pushed him away. Upon a lot of cajoling and promises, Lea allowed him to hold her. He tucked the covers up to her chin and held her close. He turned her towards him so that she knew how serious he was. She gave him a questioning glance as she looked at him with sparkling blue eyes.

'You are the best thing that has happened to me, Lea. I love you,' he whispered making her heart swell with love.

Lea pressed herself closer and murmured, 'I love you, too. And happy birthday, Ken.'

***

Ken soon realized that Lea had no trouble whatsoever in keeping her end of the deal. She seemed to be a pro in controlling her urges or whatever they were called. But he ... He had to go through hell everyday and every night. Lea was driving him crazy by doing nothing at all. Looking at her in an old, faded T-shirt or just watching her load the dishwasher made him hard. She never tried to tease him or flaunt her assets before him. She talked to him as she always did. But he just couldn't stop staring at her perky little breasts or the way her perfectly round ass swayed every time she walked. His own wife was driving him wild and there was nothing he could do about it. He didn't want to be the first one to approach her. And he very well knew that Lea would never come to him. Thanks to his useless accusation and her stupid decision, he was going to have blue balls.

He looked at her as she moved swiftly on the dance floor. It was Rebecca's wedding reception and here, he was sitting like a dummy -- dreaming and ogling at his own wife. Enough was enough he thought as he walked onto the dance floor. And it seemed like a perfect moment, Lea's dance partner was off to get a drink.

'Care to dance?' asked Ken as he tapped on Lea's shoulder.

She was wearing a light purple colored, off-shoulder gown which had a knee length slit. The dress cupped each and every curve of her body, making her look even more irresistible. Her strappy white heels made her look tall. She had left her hair lose and the wild strands, teased her shoulders every now and then, making Ken want to run his fingers through them.

'Sure,' said Lea as she walked into his arms.

Ken held her close, looping his hands around her waist. He breathed in her scent, wanting nothing more than just to take her away from all the crowd and noise.

'You look sensational,' he whispered against her ear, his breath hot against her skin.

'Thanks,' murmured Lea shyly as she pressed herself closer to him -- her soft breasts pressing up against his hard chest. He lowered his hands to her bottom and was about to try something, when Lea guided his hands back up to her waist. 'Behave,' she said as a warning and continued to sway to the beats.

'Do you know what you are doing to me, baby?' asked Ken as he looked into her sparkling blue eyes.

'What?' asked Lea as she looked up at him, wanting to run her fingers through his well combed hair.

'I love you, baby,' confessed Ken sincerely, hoping that his voice conveyed the right emotion.

'I love you too, Ken. I want you to believe me,' said Lea as she looked into her deep brown eyes. 'If you think otherwise ...'

Ken silenced her with his finger on her lips. 'I trust you, sweetie. I always did and I always will.'

'Thanks,' said Lea as she leaned against his chest. 'But I still won't sleep with you,' she added.

'Oh God! Baby, this is heights. I can't survive another night if I don't have you in my bed. My balls are turning blue ...'

Lea burst into a laugh at hearing Ken's words. She tried to stifle her laugh but Ken's wretched face, made her laugh again.

'I am serious, Lea,' said Ken as he took her hand and placed it over his crotch. 'I am hard all the time.'

Lea took her hand back and shot Ken a heated glare. 'Behave, Ken. There are people around us,' she said and looked away.

'Dammit, Lea. Do you want me to beg?' asked Ken as he took her face into his hands. 'I can do that.'

'Just to get laid?' snickered Lea as stepped back and she looked at him wearily. 'Why beg? I think there will be many girls who are more than willing to get into the sack with you.'

'Lea ...' said Ken as he pulled her back into his arms. 'I want my wife in my bed. Not some random girl. Got it?'

'Yes, but I won't be a sex toy with whom --'

He leaned down and kissed her, kissed her hard, ignored the way her hands rose and pushed at his shoulders, the way she tried to twist her mouth from his, kissed her until she melted under him, until her whimpers of protest changed to whimpers of desire. Her mouth opened to his. He allowed himself one long, deep taste before pulling back.

She went limp against his body. She laid her head against his chest and breathed in his masculine scent and letting go of their problems for a few seconds. He held her close and she was thankful for it, because it looked like she couldn't trust her legs anymore. They had turned into jelly the moment Ken had placed his lips on hers.