All Comments on 'Breakfast with Miss Lara'

Write 2nd chapter

A lot of time the futa fantasy goes hand in hand with Domination. Some people don't like it to the point of being offended. I like the kink, myself.

You should write longer stories.

Sooo Hot!

That was hot and shows potential, but there were so many typos and misused words it forced me to try to translate what you were trying to say. Like: "Shakily getting to his feet he instinctual did they tend in his pants." That completely ruins the flow and immersion when the reader has to figure that out. An editor would help you tremendously, and you're not far off. Again, a really good, hot start, I'm not trying to discourage you in any way!

i am really in need of editing and bad at spelling and whatnot, so i apologize. i have a few more chapters already, but id read in the sub guidelines that they wanted 750 words, and this was well over. anyways, glad you liked it.

Seconding the comments below, I encourage you to find an editor and write longer chapters.

Also, I'd like to see more character development. Why is Remi so submissive? How did they meet? Why is Miss Laura such a slob? Why is Miss Laura worthy of Remi's servitude? Exposition can be boring narrative, or it can be revealed in sexy ways.