by Evil Alpaca
I wish you were still around so I could tell you how much I love your writing. I found this story back when you posted it, and I keep coming back, even 16 years later.
We miss you.
Delightful, well-constructed and very well-told original tale. Fabulous imagination.
Top-line, well written, original story by a mastercrafsman in the art of writing - as well as a pretty Evil Alpaca.
Epic tight griping wonderful telltale ..... Thats truly one of the best ones here presented on the literotica site and for the people, getting hot with the editing, start writing yourself and be perfect ...... Thank you eviling for this amazing piece of poetry, it was worth reading ...... Even ten stars are not enough ........ ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨💥💥💥💥💥💥⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 💝💝💝💝💝💝💝
Sadie's kinda wonderful, then turned archetypal.
The editing deficit was painful though.
Sadie Hewitt my all time favorite hero.
I have read Breathless numerous time and now once again. It's my medicine against depression. One of the best stories I ever read.
Does anyone here know how Evil Alpaca is doing?
I think this is the third time i've read this story, now onto protect and serve..again.
Such a deep and deive tale . Your writing is nothing short of genius . Thank you .
"You say "Frost and his crowd were gone or hiding." yet the Wraiths destroyed Frozst after the battle with Solomon..."
Frost is gone, his crowd is hiding. No continuity error.
Definitely one of my favorite stories if not THE favorite story. Everything about it drew me in and kept me there.
This story and its characters were absolutely wonderful! I just finished reading the series. I'm looking forward to reading the rest of your work. I expect it will be as good as what I've just finished. I see that you haven't been around for a while. I sincerely hope that you'll return to write more. If not, I hope you are writing elsewhere, preferably for money. If so, and you're not returning, let us know where else you are writing. I know I'd love to read more of your stories.
Thanks again for the story!
You say "Frost and his crowd were gone or hiding." yet the Wraiths destroyed Frozst after the battle with Solomon...
great story, i loved it. one aspect which impresses me is how you are able to write an epic type of storyline in a relatively short format. focus and touch, very nice!
Great story, great writing, started reading and had to finish in one session
I know that's such a small word to express how I feel about this story... it was a wonderful, exceptionally great story... well written and one of the best on this site... which is why I've included it and you in my favorites lists. I am about to read some of your other stories (if there are any), and hope they are as interesting as "Breathless". Kudos Evil Alpaca... there are many wonderfully talented people on Literotica, and you are (in my opinion) in the top ten... may you bless us with your stories for years to come and may you be blessed to have them published for the reading enjoyment of the masses!
Sure wouldn't mind a sequel with all the wonderful characters of Breathless (hint, hint... LOL)
Really like this story, the plot is cool and the writing is really convincing!! =)
This is my first ever comment i had to leave one after finishing this story. Started reading and couldnt stop your really talented
As I've said before, I always enjoy your stories. You are a good storyteller.
This series was one of my favorites from you. Sadly I see you've not been on in a couple years so I'm afraid we won't see new stores :( . Our loss...
Here's hoping that you are happy and occupied with things that make your life good!
Your story kept me up until 5 :45am.
I couldn't put my damn tablet down.
Awesome writing.
With finishing this story, I have finished all of your sci-fi/fantasy stories and wish there was more. It sad to see it come to an end but the journey was wonderful.
Everyone reading the story allready knows how awesome it is, so instead i want to compliment your tags for the story. So often only a couple of basic and sometimes nonsensical tags are placed for a story, but yours (for this one at least xD) are well thought out and complete. Lets the rest of the community have a better chance at finding this great work.
completely absorbing and intense storytelling. i wish you would write again :)
Just finished reading this story for the fifth time and it is great every time. Thank You for this wonderful story and all your other great work. Hope to see something new from you soon.
I know I am horribly late to the party but I had to leave a review. It's past midnight and I have to wake up really early tomorrow but I couldn't put this down until I had read all the chapters. It's such a beautiful work of art. You know how to paint a picture with words. It was like watching a great movie.
Hats off to you!
- Ruby
Like everything I've read from EA thus far, this is truely a wonderous tale filled with suspense and excitement. I loved every minute of it and I can't wait to read more. Many thanks to EA for sharing.
i devoured this! the story is awesome you really should see if you can make this into a book! You did a wonderful job and i have to say i want more of your world. :)
That was truly amazing. I've enjoyed many stories on this site but I can honestly say this one has been my absolute favorite. It was so well thought-out and interestingly written. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Thank you.
I must say this is one of the most (if not THE most) well-written and thought-out tales on this site. The plot was just amazing and the characters and world were well-developed believable/realistic. The writing flowed wonderfully. The sexual tension was hot and the scenes detailed enough to arouse the reader without being redundant.
My only (and I mean ONLY, because nothing else needs to be improved on in my opinion) suggestion/critique is to get an editor or beta reader to go through and fix the very occassional grammatical/spelling mistakes.
This is such an awesome story. I have read it about 10 times now (no seriously I have) and I still get just as much excitement and goosbumps from it now as I did the first time I read it. I have read all your stories and while they are all exceptional, this is definately my fave. Keep up the good work.
Absolutely beautiful story. I couldn't stop reading from chapter 1 till the end. I truly believe this could have been made a novel, I think you could make a lot of money off of this story. The characters and the plot, addicting as hell. I actually thought I was a part of Sadie's life. I thank you for showing everyone your talent by writing Breathless.
I just hope you actually have books on the market because this is so well written with such an immersing story and characters that it would be a crime if you didn't! aside from needing an editor, all I have are compliments on such a great read. This is officially my 2nd favorite story that I have read on this site (and I have read most of the good ones). once again, congrats
All I hear about is how good you are.... and it true you are exceptional. I am honored to have read your stories. Thank you for sharing with us you vision of the world on how it should be.
A wonderful read, I thought you could of wrapped it up on page 4, but it finished nicely. I really did enjoy, even the second time around.
As another reader commented in my top 5 favourite stories yours take up 4 slots and this particular storey a solid 2nd best. It goes to show just how talented a writer you are, except NEEDS an editor, I look forward to hopefully more from you in the future.
Your ability to create interesting, unique and completing imersive worlds is unparalleled on this this site and your characterisation is also truly outstanding.
One small issue is as I read this I cant help but feel guilty as though I'm cheating you out of something that I should have paid for.
So for this story and all your others I want to thank you.
I loved the world you created. I am really glad I stumbled upon this story
Thank you for sharing this story. I loved your writing, the attention to detail, the humor, the caring characters. In all a terrific read.
Thank You, Thank You!!
Definitely well made story and pretty much one of the best ones ive read(tho i havnt actually read that much of erotic literature) one of the best things about the story was the humour which was definitely funny and quite original.
Thanks
I've become another of your fans. The concept; characterization and composition were immaculate. Very rarely have I ever sat down and read a novel...nonstop.
This is the third vampire series I've read of his. The story ideas are better the most maintream sci-fi.
Grammar problems abound though. There are too many misspelled words, including mixed up names and pronouns. Mistakenly repeated words or phrases are common throughout the work. Inconsistent verb tenses are also found throughout.
I really wish there was more time spent on editing as these mistakes tend to pull my attention away from the fantasy. However, that is not going to stop me from reading any sci-fi stories written by Evil Alpaca.
When I first started readig this story I was hooked that was yeasterday and I have been reading it most of today and throughly loved it. Great story
From Bearmad1963
i swear i had an orgasm when Sadie revealed herself! i was shitting my pants (not literally) at how amazing and mysterious and powerful she was. i just love a strong female character!!
B xxx
I think this is possibly one of the best stories i've ever read and include novels in that it was an excellent read
Okay, this was a great story. You still need an editor though. I loved your twist on vampire lore with this tale. Better beginning than saying Cane was first for sure. I did figure out who she was at the end of Chapter 4 as that was were I stopped reading for the night last night and it occurred to me before I fell asleep.
You have got a real knack for creating a great world. This is the third(?) You've created at this point (Keep in mind I'm reading your work in the order that you've posted). And your character creation is absolutely top notch. I've only seen you re-use a couple of your character concepts with a couple of your supporting casts. I'm looking forward to reading the rest.
just finished the whole thing for the second time and since i've read bout all your stories i found some things i didnt notice the first time. like how you included Isabel and Torrie from Twenty Years to Life, and how you included the a song from the girls that were in Lost in Texas. i like how you tie your other stories in together, its awesome! i wish you would come out with some new stuff, i keep checkin and maybe ill get lucky and find some new stuff posted here :)
brilliant, really brilliant.
i read the entire series in 24 hours - and it was worth every byte.
This is one of the best stories I have read in a very long while and I go through 8-10 novels a week. You have a great talent. I stand and applaud.
This is one of the most wonderful stories i have read and i thank You for posting it.
This was probably the best story I have ever read anywhere. I can't even put into words how amazing I think it was. Thank you for sharing it with the rest of us.
you have a great gift on your hands. You told the story in such a way that it was so clear in my mind, and I really enjoyed the bits of humor from Sadie (whitch BTW, I also figured out who she was since chapter 5!). And the concept of how vamps where created? Genius! Joss Weddon ain't got nothin' on you!
Sleep is obviously over-rated as I couldn't until I had finished this story. I loved all the twists that were thrown in. This story is easily in my top 5 of all time, if not top 2. So many times I was laughing so hard that I almost fell out of my chair at some of Sadie's antics. Can't wait to check out any other stories written by you.
Loved the Adam and Eve twist. I figured out who Sadie was about halfway through the story. I really loved the story. One suggestion, there are a lot of good people volunteering to edit stories. Your story would have benefited from editing. Otherwise I would have given it a 5.
A unique outlook. With enough sex and a very compelling story. I've found all the Alpaca stories hard to put down. Looking forward to the next.
Grrrrreat series! Man, that was sexy, scary and fun all in one fuckin' excellent package! Go Sadie! Any chance of more... Perhaps her continuing career in the Gravestones P.D?
Seriously, that was phenomenal. I have to agree, it should be a movie. How the hell have I missed reading this story for so long? That was just awesome!
The series was captivating. I didnt want to stop reading. I can't wait to read more of your writing.
Seems after reading them all that there really is something to the stories. I want to become a vampire!
Great series. Good characters, great sex (but not so much it took away from the story), and some wonderful tweaks on the old tropes.
i've just finished reading breathless again for the 5th time, while waiting for your next chapter on to protect and serve. If you were to publish your stories I wouldn't think twice about buying the whole lot. keep up the AMAZING stories!
I just recently finished reading this story for the third time... and it's just as much fun to read as it was the first time around. On a somewhat related note, I've now developed a taste for Guinness *lol*
Can't wait to see more from you!
Great story: great characters, interesting plot twists, good balance of dramma and fun!
i think that if i made a top5 of all my favorite stories you would have at least 4 of them.
I just love Sadie, she made me laugh so much i was crying. Your characters are out of this world in there complexity and richness. I would love to read more stories about Sadie and her family.
This really was an amazing piece of work; thank you so very much for creating and sharing it with us.
As others have said this has some great characterisation and facinating (if a little predictable) plot twists.
If this was a paperback it'd be a page turner; thank you again.
THIS IS THE BEST FUCKING STORY I HAVE EVER READ. IT IS SO GOOD I HAVE READ IT 3 TIMES NOW. KEEP UP THE AWESOME WORK. I HOPE YOU WILL BRING THESE CHARACTERS BACK IN ANOTHER STORY. AGAIN WONDERFUL STUFF KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK LOOK FORWARD TO YOUR NEXT STORY.
Fantastic series! Great characters as always. Just love your work! Keep the FANTASTIC stories cumming!
Exciting! I've been a follower of your works and this is on the top of the list. Well-written (with just a few typos)and the characters amazingly drawn. Thank you!
You put the rest of us writers to shame with the complexity, characters, and incredible reads to make your perfect stories. I don’t think I have ever read a nine page submission as fast as this one. Your magnificent writing captures my diehard loyalty to always check your profile first for new stories. I don't want to sound greedy but I am definitely waiting for your next masterpiece.
way to go. When do you publish? This was a fantastic story. well written, and dynamic. I felt sooo greedy when I realised you'd put the rest of it all in one posting. You create such good worlds. More more more
Once again, I'm almost speechless. One of the other reviews said it best... I didn't notice how long this was until I finished it. You've damn near ruined me for almost any other author alive.
I stayed up til three in the morning to finish this story. Kept my attention rivitted!
PD
This story rocks. I love your work keep it up. I eagerly await your next submission. thank you fora wonderful read.
Oh my god, that story was bloody insane! Very very good work and i hope you continue on to make more series! Bloody well done (full phun intended) and i sure as hell didnt see that end coming! Even with all the hints dropped throughout the series it was still quite starteling to learn the full nature of all characters.
I'd say that is the surest sign of a well executed story. The reader getting so caught up in it that they don't realize how long they have been reading until they reach "The End". Bravo on entertaining us so well yet again!
-Zengar
Great story. I love your writing and am wistfully glad to see another of your stories finished. I want to thank you for making a day a little better.