All Comments on 'Bridal Suite Submission Ch. 02'

Please keep up the good work ;)

This story shows how to build the excitement. How to add layer upon layer of sexual tension. Very well described, easy to imagine what is happening. Ended at just the right point for the reader to want more and I and am sure all who reads this do.

the separation of sentences into different paragraphs is damned annoying. Example:

Peter seemed to unwrap it with the greatest of ease, deftly untying the blue silk ribbons

and then carefully unwrapping the paper without making so much as the slightest rip. Just

watching his fingers at work made me shiver. Peter had such wonderful fingers, and such a gentle touch, and yet so firm when it needed to be.

Really?? Did that need to be separated into THREE different paragraphs? This makes the story most difficult to read. The first part was not submitted/printed in this manner, so why is the second part?

This was a lovely story. Perhaps Larry that criticized your writing might like to be an editor for you. He may be able to write & spell, and he may even have his own ideas. It is the idea for the story that is the real talent. Once again, this is a lovely story. It is also exciting and sexy.

Please give me more, quick!

Please don't make us wait so long for the next installment! Bravo-very enjoyable.

you have built the tension to a lusty peak,and i must read more!!

this new bride, so boldly submissive, gifting her entire

being to her husband. i pray this man is up for the challenge...

it'll take more than a stiff cock.

she's a delicious mix of innocence and lust, what a delight.

peter's a bit of a mystery, but so be it....i'll read on, drawing my

own conclusions...

again author, bravo!!

ps maybe friend, kim, will play a role later?

You have done a wonderful job expressing her hidden thoughts and desires. She seems so very shy at times and bold at others, very cool. I agree with Larry the spacing is frustratingly placed at times, but since it is so well written we will forgive you. ;) Can hardly wait to read on I only hope she is given a safe word if he loves her

I was tingling the enter time. Wow... can't wait to read part 3.

Its been a while since I read a story with this much clean romance in it, and I have apparently missed it a great deal. Amazing story so far. It is such a simple plot, but you deliver it with so much intensity as to make it seem unique and powerful. The reader knows what is going to happen, but it is still exhilarating when finally reading the words. Thank you!