All Comments on 'Broken Bliss Ch. 09'

Enjoyed the whole story. Looking forward to more of your works. Thanks.

Still as unrealistic and as unappealing as your latest chapters....

Anonymous,

Bug off this was a good story. Not a old fashion WHAM Bam Thank you Mama,,

I enjoyed the series...

It is very sad to know that Jason cant have babies. Otherwise from beginning till end the story was fantastic. One of best stories. Thank you so much.

Enjoyed from start to finnish! Thank You for sharing your works with us.Can't wait to see whats next.

you ruined it by him allowing jenny back into his life and they should not have told anyone about the money. saying they couldn't adopt because they were single is not true single people adopt all the time. you should have stopped several chapters ago. the series still needs a rewrite to make it flow properly with your other story.

Sorry, but this story lost all it's appeal after the first chapters. Jason is constantly being stepped on, cheated on from all angles, used etc. I could go on and on but you get the point. He stands out as wimp and a pushover who can't stand up for himself. The first chapters had a nice flow to it, but you involved several people and situations and seems to have problems balancing it all out. You brought in outsiders from the original characters for short visits, and that usually creates more problems than possibilities in this category. As for the latest additions, to me they seem rushed and sometimes forced. They lack realism and the original storyline and the characters personality which got me curious in the first place doesn't seem to be there anymore.

I've never been able to enjoy stories involving cheating or swinging. And Lisa's cheating and Jason's lack of reaction was the final straw for the lack of realism for me. I don't even know why I've checked for updates after that. It has just followed in the same pattern with every release.

overall the story was good ,but jenny should have been left out faith could have been his g/f. what and when did the doc run sterilty tests and what about breaking his arms caused it?

It sometimes happens when a couple adopts a child, the woman gets pregnant.

Now wouldn't it be fun if after they adopt, that all five women wind up pregnant.

Good story and I hope to see some more of your work soon.

Thanks for the read.

the moment I go to the part where it said he was sterile I hit page 2, hit end page, and am here posting this comment...

you killed/murdered the story for me... maybe have to have surgery to fix something that was broken during the accident so he couldn't have kids until it was fixed or something like that, but no you went on making him sterile which for me was/is brutal and a total boner kill, why not stick your balls in a blender why dont you?

was going to read your other storys, but this just killed any interest I had in you as an author and your storys...

The only things I didn't like were the fact that he took jenny back and the sterile part,to gmail,that was a little harsh to the guy! Other than that,very good story!

Great story! Yes there are parts I would have liked to have been different, but it isn't my story. Having recieved a degree in Nursing I will say, for your future writing, that if he was sterile, he was not sterile from an unknown injury in the accident. It would have had to have been trauma, and it would not have been missed within the confines of your story, i.e. he would not have been getting hard and fucking so much and so soon after the accident. Thanks and I will look for more from you.

absolutely loved this whole series great job.

WHAT A BUNCH OF STOIRES I HOPE THERE ARE MORE TO THESE FAMILY COMEING BUT IF NOT NO WORRIES ALL 3 STORIES WHERE GREAT WAS ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT THE WHOLE TIME...... kinda makes me wish i was close to my family

Thanks for a really excellent series, nicely written and certainly made me dream that something like that would happen to me

as a stand alone it was ok but because it is connected to your other story "I FOUND MY SISTER STRIPPING" it is a fail. both stories would have been good if they weren't connected because you FUCKED UP the connection they didn't mesh. you say one thing here and change it it in the other story A REAL PLOT AND STORY KILLER. when you write two stories and connect them you HAVE to make sure all facts mesh hereyou TOTALLY FAILED. do all readers a favor and delete both this story and I FOUND MY SISTER STRIPPING and rewrite them using a good editor or change them so they don't cross one another. this was a good story until i read the other and the facts didn't match up it was like two different people wrote them without checking with each other enough it really confuses the reader and ruins the storys flow.

I just read the two supposedly connected stories "Broken Bliss" and "I Found My Sister Stripping". I found them not fun to read. You committed many grammatical errors. You used several homophones randomly. Homophones are words that sound the same but are spelled quite differently, and have entirely different meanings. I also think the sex was quite overdone. I found myself trying to skip over most of it since I couldn't see it supporting your plot. If you wanted to write a jerk off story, then this would be fine. I also noticed you trying to follow a plot line. After awhile I got tired of hearing the same things over, and over, and over again. The sex got in the way of the story. This is my opinion.

I also noticed you started with an idea, then just dropped it in mid stream. The one thing you seem to do throughout the two stories is writing randomly in the present tense and the past tense. I suspect that you are re-telling what has already happened. If this is the case you need to keep in the past tense, except, of course, for actual dialog.

Also one of my pet peeves is the phrase that goes something like this, "Whatever she lacked in experience she made up with enthusiasm". This is not a direct quote from your story, but you know what I mean. I have read this or something like this in so many stories that it rubs me the wrong way.

Please acquire a really good editor, or maybe more than one. This will help with correcting grammatical errors. Straightening out continuity and getting what you had in your mind across to the reader. The editor pool is waiting there for you to avail yourself of their expertise. One way to decide what editor to use is to read a really good story and, see who the editor is in the credits.

the story was well thought out, as for the errors, So What!.

as for the rest of your so called hints, only try to put down the author.

Can you do better, If so show us!

To the author, Keep writting, most of us like your style.

As for those trolls that have e-mailed me, with your comments, SO WHAT!.

I call them as I see them.

You still did not sign your names.

ED

you and samslam are my biggest fans, great story. i wish i had a motorcycle

orgy 3some mother daughter sister brother Redhead anal blowjob BF might be poly sharing ....

the only parts i didn't like was when they found out he was sterile and that they would adopt. I know the women don't want to have sex with another man(which i like) but it would've been great if they at least had a sperm donor, that way their kids would be their own flesh and blood, but now the family tree will end there. I still give it five stars though.

I couldnt help notice the smoking gun in the room. Where did the sudden windfall come from? Its either a deus ex machina for a problem that wasnt apparent, or you were hinting at a side story that hasnt been written yet. If there is another story in the works I cant wait to read it!

In the meantime I am going to read everything else you have written so far and will be on the lookout for more,

soulrazr

the investigator might have determined or suspected sterility or similar problems that could have been costly so . . .

I didnt think that subject 0 was a related story untill after I started reading it. It did explain the sudden windfall. I am amazed, however, that all three of the stories appear to be written at the same time though.

I would be straight up pissed if I couldn't have kids! But anyway I loved your story.

all around excellent! couldn't have ended any other way!

What a spectacular ending. Thanks for the stories.

But I liked it. I gave you five stars for all of your chapters in Broken Bliss except for chapter 3.

So he got married just to start adopting kids? Guess love doesn't count for much in the end, huh?

ending sucked ruined a good story.

Title says it all. the love between Mother, Son and Daughter was everything I could ask for. Then came the mandatory girl on girl, group and straight lesbian sex. Love = 0 rest of story. Waste of time and pixels!

That has to be the best, hottest, horniest story I've read on here !

I loved every page, the short cameo with Geo was a bit out of place, but everything else was incredible !

My only complaint is that it was too short - and I'm not too happy that I've finished it,.

But nevertheless, one amazing story - just Wow !

And a big thank-you : well worth more than the 5 stars I awarded to every chapter !

I would want a dam site more than the price of a few harleys if an accidnt had stopt me having my own children. Thats the one bit that spoilt the story for me.

yo this story is the shit man. u a g. keep it up.

there gonna be a ch 10? maybe get him to fuck his daughters too? :P

I love the way you brought the stories together. Loved them all

Should have just tossed her out of the story

I have read this story to the bitter end. The first few chapters really turned me on. But as you introduced more women it became too convoluted for me, and the ending killed it for me. I think the sex became repetitive and too predictable in the latter half of the chapters.

Thanks for the read, The story was a bit to long .

Loved the story right up to the end. I would have liked to read a little more detail as to how they where all gonna manage to be together and if they all moved in together.

An excellent series of beautifully crafted erotic stories connected through Jason, well done in bringing all the assorted threads together to this great conclusion.

Love the way every story entertwined

liked it all but the STERILE!!??

I really liked it but the sterile part does not make sense. The accident did not damage anything near his testicles so why would he go sterile. His testicles still produce potent sperm in my mind.

Do we find out why Jenny cheated?

Lost a star when he married Jenny. He should have just kept screwing her for the hell of it; Married Faith, because no one officially new they were related, then adopted kids.

I agree with bigurn.

I also agree with bigum.

For me you ruined this story with your ridiculous ending. Why did you have to make him STERILE for fucks sake AND to make things worst he ends up with that slutty fucking whore Jenny. If he had to end up with anyone of them maybe Faith, being only a half sister and win a different surname he could’ve possibly married her and got away with it. Sorry you lost me with this . A very lucky ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Could have ended so much better

As an avid reader of incestuous love stories, I enjoyed your story. Yes, there were ups and downs as to logical plot and/or character development. The sterility issue was disappointing; however, it occurs in fiction as in real life. Although this section is for readers to comment on the story, having read some comments, they attack the author without offfering constructive criticism. This is the 1st story written by this author I have read. He/she created this story via original thought. He/she believed in the product and had the courage to submit it. The story got "published" by this site. This story has been read by numerous people. To those who have critized the author but offered nothing constructive, my question for you is simply this: "What have you written and had presented by this site"

i really would like just a story about the women who offered them money. i don't like loose ends in a story. other than that, great story.