All Comments on 'Broken Fantasy'

And have his "old colleague" charged with assault and battery? How much do you think pussy is worth to him then?

I love these types of stories! Very well done! Would love to see a longer version, with perhaps description of the aftermath from the wife’s POV. Either way, thank you for a great read!

What I "what" to hear is you saying, "I suppose you're right, I do need an editor or proofreader".

Don't misunderstand, I enjoyed your hot story, very much, but was too distracted by all the errors (especially your use of "your" when "you're, ie; you are) was required.

I even enjoyed the ending, because it's sometimes the reality when a husband wants to wife watch. Ask me how I know.

Please keep writing, but use one of Literotica's free editors to catch your errors prior to posting your stories. Don't serve a delicious meal on a dirty plate. Thanks!

Sorry but this tale just didn't sell it. I get the premise, guy wishes for a three-way and it goes awry, but the two twelve-year-olds having a fight in front of their girl doesn't sell. The wife calls the cops, he calls the cops, but there is no way his wife, who was initially reluctant is still aroused. There would have to be serious issues between the two or she would have to have a significant Fetish or Mental Health issue to just sit back and do nothing. No married couple on the edge of exploring a new sexual boundary is going to be good with harm happening to one of their loved ones. The plot fails there. SUSPENSION OF DISBELIEF you need to work on it. We have to believe in your character's motives.

I hated this. It was titled "Non-Consent." Which is "meat and potatoes" for me :) BUT this is more of a cuckold story. Which I hate. AND that is NOT your fault. I just don't dig these kind of stories. So, I'm not rating this because it would be low and that wouldn't be because of anything you did wrong. I would feel bad giving you a low rating on a story that fans of this genre would probably rate as high. As for the grammatical errors, I would suggest you set yourself to read any story you're thinking of publishing at least ten times. You'll catch the majority of errors that way and if you find it hard to read something you've written that much THEN it probably isn't ready to publish anyway.

Congrats on the anniversary.

Try to keep some lead in your pencil.

Amen.

Don't worry about calling cops. After fight he could taken Baseball bat to deal with the asshole, but he just set there.

You don't make it right by throwing things without sence together.

1

Great story plot! I'm not sure why you ended the story it was simply to out of character of this loving wife to loose respect and leave. It seems "the husbands friend" could of led this along by apologizing firmly for things getting out of hand with the fight. There could of been so many ways for dominance over the husband while the guilt of the wife being led into continued crys of demeaning words after the husband always watches but does not enjoy or know how to end friends control? This friend can begin to humiliate the couple putting them in potentially more and more sexual situations. Maybe it's the continurd wifes love foe the husband that keeps the husband from leaving each more and more for him shamed fuck session while the wife continues her now for sexual addiction for the friend. So many possibilities with the interactions between the husband and the wife when alone. The friend could become more and more intrusive in ramping up the humiliation when with the husband alone? Your the writer not me although I love the potential of your story

Haha a few have said how disappointing that it went the way depicted, but that's EXACTLY how these fantasies CAN go! Women can't help becoming emotionally involved with men they have sex with. It's not often 'just sex' to them the way it often is for men., Give your wife to a man with a bigger cock, or just more handsome than you and you're begging for trouble. Keep it as a fantasy.

What is a boat shaped mouth?

"Be careful of your fantasies. Making them come true can be the worst thing that ever happened to you. Trust me on that one." You got that one right!

Is there a man in this story? I'm fully surprised you decided to leave out the racial edge that most cuck authors add to the humiliation aspect. I'm also surprised that you didn't follow the typical theme of her having his baby.

I guess wherever you are from the "men" (sorry, males) don't own guns (like NY, Massachusetts, or California). The women are all sluts who allow their husbands to be beaten to a pulp without calling cops or at least their girlfriends (to come watch). The husbands also just watch their wives get "raped" while sitting idly in adjacent chairs.

Good luck with the Muslim influx (especially if you have daughters). The Brits are loving their "diversity" just as the German commoners and Swedes are. It can be a wonder what spineless action spawn.

All my girlfriends and first wife fucked other guys behind my back, but eventually flaunted it. I thought it was cool they were so sexual. It turned me on. Guys pursued each of them. I acted big, all the guys wanted what I had. Funny thing is all of them eventually left me for guys with huge cocks. We all still live in the same town. When I see them they still flaunt it. My current wife knows everything and has now started dating too. I'm not sure what it is they see in me that I don't know? -FH

If Jack had been married and couldn’t leave his wife and “you” didn’t care that I was his, so long as you still got to watch.

You wanted a "stranger" to fuck your wife. Problem was... he wasn't a stranger! Why would you do this? Then, when he assulted you, why didn't you get out of the damn chair, leave the room and call the Police? What a weak, spineless whimp.

Yup, if it's a true story, than it's pretty realistic. If she was pent up and frustrated, than when the dam broke he was there to catch it. Chances are, if she met the same guy on the street she might never have done anything, but they were brought together under such low standards, that she was free and unchanged to be a baseless whore. Are women truly such mindless sluts that they might act like that just because another guy's tool is bigger? I wouldn't turn into a mindless fuck toy just because a woman had bigger tits! It's takes more than that to really get things going.

But who knows! Some people are pretty low.

But never, ever let your wife fuck someone else! Your girlfriend, fine. But you're wife?

Wishes have a very sad way of always coming true but with a twist in the tale.

Cucks/wimpy husbands have fantasies of turning women into sluts, and when they do, they're unstoppable coz they already have permission.

Why on the first night after Jack assaulted him,didn't he find a weapon and attack Jack,he could claim self defence.?

with nitpic.... I realize Jacks 6'4" and much bigger but he should have found a hand gun.. butcher knife.. some thing...even calling the cops screaming rape... and taught that ugly bastard a lesson

So, a guy attacks you in your home in front of a witness, and you don't fucking call 911 and have him arrested? No? Well, you deserve everything that happens to you. No, please surrender your Man Card and what's left of your manhood.

I was thoroughly fucked by one of my former husband's friends and enjoyed the experience much like Connie in the story. My former husband had set up the "date" and was watching me getting fucked, but later objected to the obvious pleasure I was getting (I'm a screamer too) and he filed for divorce, claiming infidelty on MY part...Good ridance

Stupid story simply because no matter how big (body wise) Jack was ,naked, balls deep and face down he's 100% defenceless to an attack that would put him in the catatonic position: a full blown assault on his balls.

Instead we get the usual wimpy hub bit who jerks off, slinks away on realising she's doing it again.

Pathetic.

So, Jack rapes the guy’s wife in front of him and he does nothing? WTF?? He can’t get a knife or a bat or a 2X4 and get him when Jack’s busy raping his wife? And Connie? One fuck with a big dick and she throws over her whole life?

This story is utter bullshit.

Femdom agitprop wins one.

I hate some of your stories they're just so ugly

Rape? On what planet is that rape, you embecile. Good story btw.

You know, I hate stories like this, but I can't feel an ounce of sympathy towards the MC. As the saying goes, "Play Stupid Games, Win Stupid Prizes."