All Comments on 'Brownwood: I Dreamed Ch. 05'

either im a softy or your a really great writer, but i don't know if i really want to see him end up with bree cant wait for the next chapter. and future stories by you

if one can leave them in the REM zone, they may survive. TK U MLJ LV NV

The only complaint I have is that the chapters are too short and too far apart! Please keep up the high level of the story.

Fiction is like the old joke, A skeleton walks into a bar, orders a beer and a mop.

Well written characters have desires, wants, and those wants have consequences that are messy.

I hope they get back together

You are manipulating the reader .

Your protagonist is suffering because of Bree Olson.He gets professional help, finally. And what happened , he went back to the Olson family. Any professional would have told him to wait for a little time to pass before apologizing. And to use an intermediary until he could have a face to face with her.

Right after the shooting he should have gone to a psychiatrist for treatment .

Let me see, if I was a poor writer someone connected to Ty will show up soon!

Gave you 3*s. Hope you get better. I'm

AMerryMan

You are forcing them back together.....let nature take its course. The therapist would never tell him to talk to the Oslen family this quickly. You are rushing it's just so Bree can again be a part of his life and everything work out. Life doesn't work like that and neither should your story

It does sound like a reconciliation story, but hey, that happens fifty per cent of the time even in marriages, and makes for heat... If the story gives you emotions then the author is doing his job.

I was wrong.

DFW"CUCK" ..... your readers will help you look for your balls but let's face it ...... when it comes to this pathetic RAAC story ..... you had none to look for.

..... maybe they are still in your bedroom closet!!!!

“I know I'll be able to someday forgive you” – Forgive HIM?! As she herself said, SHE made him that way, she should be working on forgiving herself!

“I'd like to say I'll miss you but right now I can't say that.” – Good, I’m glad she won’t miss him, maybe NOW she’ll stay out of his life! And I certainly hope he doesn’t miss HER, at least not the person she is now.

Nitpick – In Florida it’s DisneyWORLD, Disneyland is in California.

“What he wanted was someone like Bree.” – NO, he needed someone like the OLD Bree!

“I also owned up to my part in our breakup.” – HIS part in the breakup? Maybe I misread something, but other than wanting a fiancée that would rather be with him than go out an party, just what did he do wrong?

I do not understand the anger and blame everybody, including Zach himself, are directing towards him. After enormous provocation, during a sexual encounter Bree insisted on, he engaged in rough sex of the kind he knew for a fact she had willingly engaged in with others. Maybe rude, maybe requiring discussion, but not warranting all this angst. What am I missing?

And by chapter two, I have to say, I truly loathed this man.

The author gave us a full range of emotion: Ire, hate, anger, callousness, anger, fury, cruelty, anger, disdain, petulance, and sulking...or and anger.

And considering some of the self absorbed heroes DFW has produced, I was wondering if the AUTHOR realized what a rat fuck this guy was. I am not a person who does not feel a mother can be beyond recrimination. However the way he said it, the brinksmanship he brought to essentially everyone...he was a jerk, a beast and a lout.

This says NOTHING about what Bree did wrong. But honestly, what did Bree do wrong? Is she not allowed to be scared at being married? Is she allowed to change her mind? Is she allowed to be angry, furious, petulant, sulky and irate like 'our hero'? Is she not allowed to break up?

Let's be clear here. SHE BROKE UP WITH HIM. And it wasn't Ty. It wasn't Frat Boys. It wasn't date rape drugs.

They were fighting. He wanted...DEMANDED what she could not give and he was an ass about it. So what exactly did she do wrong? She broke up with him.

So his demons are pretty inexplicable to me. It wasn't the best way to break up...but they had MONTHS of warning signs so this was not a shock to him, even as written.

BUT! Thank God the author DID realize what an ass hat this guy was being. He had an epiphany. He realized he was an asshole and he, after FOUR CHAPTERS of being an asshole, learned to apologize to people. (His mother and his sister beat him to it, by the way. Just saying)

Let's see where we go from here. It is in Romance and I am waiting for a glimmer of it to show up.(...and anger, and despair...and sullenness...and anger...Okay, I'll stop now)

A RAAC? Well duh! It's in the ROMANCE category, home of the HEA (Happy Ever After) ending! What the hell were you expecting?

She provoked the sex, and was shocked he was angry during it? She was used to 3somes and suddenly was a prude?

5* Believable characters and plot. The guy is truly bring torn apart, mentally snd physically. I think Bree is a horsewoman of the Apocalypse. She just keeps ruining the guy especially with Ty shooting our flawed hero. Ignore FD45, he's probably a metrosexual.

Ass hole. She can give her ass to any man but the one she thinks she love, what a birch.

Sorry, but no way. She leads him on in their youth, dates him through college, moves in with him, agrees to marry him and starts planning it, then... She does a complete 180 and postones the wedding, parties like a whore, tells everyone that she's free, proceeds to get drunk enough that 3 guys end up fucking her, moves out, aborts her kid, marries the asshole, gets involved in drugs and now wants to come back into his life like nothing has happened. Fuck that. He's correct that there is no way he should even consider taking her back. People need to realize that their actions have consequences. If that consequence means that he wants nothing to do with her, she needs to realize that and back off. His mom too. Why is it that women think they know what's best for men? They don't understand us any more than we understand them. Just make your intentions known and back off and wait. So far he's done exactly what he should have done although I would have been a little more honest with his and her parents regarding why they broke up. That might have made everything easier when she showed back up. Going good so far. Let's hope he doesn't lose his balls along the way and realizes there are other, faithful women out there that will try their best to make him happy.

Bree was making him breakfast so the rough sex hadn't made her run. She ran after he showed her what a slut she was right after breaking up with him. She came back to him bringing pain and misery and everyone is mad at him?

There has got to be a better woman out there for him and his daughter.

Being a backstabbing cheating slut tends to screw things up.

I guess she is an idiot as well.

"I am your mother and right now you are acting like a child." - As he said, she's also GINNY'S mother, yet was able to stay out of HER affairs.

"I would ask that you reconsider your relationship with your mother." - It's his MOTHER who should reconsider her relationship with HIM! She has to accept that he is an adult and has the right to make his own decisions, and, yes, mistakes, if things turn out that way. She has a lot of nerve saying that SHE won't miss HIM! If she didn't try to force her way back into a relationship, they might at least be friends. She should have stuck to nursing him and taking care of Shannon, and laid of the seduction.

"He knew Shannon missed Bree and he admitted to himself that he did too." - I'm sorry, there are plenty of attractive, mature women out there that don't have Bree's baggage. His choices aren't limited to Kayla and Bree!

Again, even if the baby WASN'T Ty's, doesn't mean that it was Zach's. Bree had sex with several men that night her sex with Zach, it was unprotected.

"I also owned up to my part in our breakup" - HIS part? He might not have been blameless, rarely is anyone in a breakup, but his share pales in comparison to hers.

@ForensicFossil, I'm with you! No way should he be beating himself up like this.

Unfortunately, this is Romance, so Reconciliation is in the cards.

Refuses to help Zach protect his little girl to protect his daughter bree who created mess. Not to mention daddy ''i a big ol lawdog'' olsen swore he would protect Zach.

Two bullets later ol daddy says ol golly gee boy ty acted fast....oh well my perfect lil bree is safe.

What exactly is big deal with his anal ex with bree...she was used to giving it up to ty and his buddies....you know he shared her during their marriage...that and though hesitant at first she was bucking back by the time he was finished.

Dfw is off the rails in this story

I'm a fan of DFWBeast. He's a hell of a writer, but I'm confused.

What exactly did Zach do? He had rough sex with a willing partner (at least at the start). She doesn't tell him to stop, she doesn't try to get away. He then behaves like and is treated like he served the Kool Aid at Jonestown.

It feels like deus ex machina in an attempt to balance the scales between them so reconciliation becomes reasonable.

Most of commenters git it right, the good the bad and the ugly,

The good is your writing an engaging plot. Well developed characters (though not always likeble ones). They are not unidimensional but very complex and real people.

The bad, what is he exactly apologizing for? Using his ex-fiancee as the slut she is? btw she never explained her lies to him. She was not drugged but a willing participant in the gang bang. Cheaters lie and Bree is not the exception. I know as a writer you're heading to a RAAC and somehow you needed to balance the scales. You failed. Scales are not balanced between them. She still acting like a selfish bitch.

"She wrote: "Zach, you hurt me in a way I didn't think was possible anymore." Really? Is she ever going to realize how deeply she hurt HIM? So the ex who got shot and was forced to live with you in the same house used you and ahd some rough sex with you. So what? I didn't hear a "no, stop". I didn't hear a "stop" at the DVD scene either. So, something really rotten is cooking here.

The ugly, when your loved ones give you shit or try to manipulate you like a puppet in a string it always get ugly. She shouldn't have left the situation reach so far before reacting. Sbrooks is right he had many options. Also it was his family who should reconsider their relationship with him.

Part of the ugly is that I'm smelling a RAAC.

I like your writng, but I simply cannot read any further. I didn't even get past page 1 of this. It's truly awful. Sorry, I respect you as a writer, but not one single aspect of this story appeals to me. I've choked back all the bile that I can, and if I read any further, I really will vomit. So, I'm out.

Better luck with your next one.

First she blamshift everything back to him. Really? Apologize exactly for what? Put a mirror in front of her and show her the drug addicted slut she was? I know it must have hurt her to see herself in her all her sluttish glory, but what the DVD showed was nothing but the truth.

Second, "He knew the type of woman he was looking for. What he wanted was someone like Bree." You need to tell me what were you smoking when you wrote this crap? Really? a selfish, drug addicted, manipulative gangbang slut is what he needs around his little girl. Bc Bree is such a great role mother for his daughter! You obviously dont have any kids. You castrated him. I didnt realize such a great writer could write such an utter pile of shit like this sentence.

For a short while. I was reading the comments back through 2017 agreeing with all but perhaps one as I was typing my comments. Then I read Anon 7/3/17's and stopped writing, as there was no need, those words were almost identical to mine. She can't understand how and why things went so wrong? This woman couldn't tell the truth to save her own ass much less anyone else. It's good she can't have any more children as any children she would have would be too stupid to breathe. He should have shown his mother and sister the dvd and given her family a copy. Then they would understand what he has been going through. Signed: BTW

Runs deep in that family.

What happened to the DVD?

Why did the Olsen's turn snotty on him.They told him they would be in his debt for helping save Bree and the family from Ty.What changed their minds.As for getting back with Bree that should be a definite non starter.

Why you want a copy? Haha

Powerful story...Damn! 5*

Glad he is trying to deal with his pain and anger. It isn't about the blame game at this point. It is about him healing. And Bree too. Just don't see with all the crap that happened how it could ever reconcile. Seems like a bridge-too-far RAAC. But honestly once getting to this point, it would become perhaps possible. But don't see how they would even make it to this chapter #5.

I am still waiting to find out who the father of the second child is because Ty is meant to be sterile.

"I'm so very sorry all this happened. I know it seems like I keep saying that again and again but it's true." - That's because keeps doing things that she needs to be sorry for.

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"I hope one day that I'll be able to find someone that precious to call me 'Mom.'" - She'll definitely need to find someone, since she can't have any children.

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"And then I returned the favor," - And it was well deserved!

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"If you're here to try and justify your actions..." - He doesn't need to justify them, their justification is self-evident.

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"She didn't deserve to marry an abusive asshole like Ty." - That's not 100% true. Obviously, nobody "deserves" what happened to her, but she's the one who broke their engagement and ran of to Ty.

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"I also owned up to my part in our breakup." - His part in the breakup?

Please don’t direct this tale for a reconciliation

FD45 is incorrect in his comment - Bree is a POS. MC needs to get a transfer to FL and take his daughter with him.

What a first class cunt Zach is. Using the child as a weapon against his mother, ghosting the only family he has and anally raping his ex girlfriend.

In truth he deserves nothing but hatred from all of them and hopefully his daughter will disown the rapist when she's old enough to understand.

I like all of your stories, but his may be the best of the lot, judging by my tears. :DD

Why is this bitch acting like she's the victim?

I don't understand how Bree's the victim. She gave her ass to another man when she denied him. She may have aborted his baby. She was responsible for a psychopath threatening to kill him and his precious daughter--meaning she would have been responsible for the death of both his children. She was responsible for him getting shot because her actions forced him into that position.

Yet he takes a bit of revenge and he feels that bad? Everyone is that mad at him? Unbelievable

5 stars! I need to see how this ends lol

Wow! Hitting the points with emotion!

Well done.