BTB Chapel

"As from this moment," Mr Owen said as Mrs Owen came to stand beside him, "the fraud that this Chapel has been has ended. I'm a fraud. Why? I love my wife and always have."

Mrs Owen kissed him on the cheek.

"And many of you have been living a lie too. You don't hate your partners. You just want somewhere to moan about them..."

"...and get cheap beer!" someone shouted from the floor.

"That too..."

"...and strippers." A woman's voice shouted.

"And we still can," Mr Owen said. "Moans, Beer, Strippers are still possible. But today I want you to do something different, just for once."

He pressed another button under the rostrum. The carpet slid from the sides covering the tunnel.

"Please, join your partner, and give them a hug."

A few people moved, then more, until they were all standing side by side. It was obvious that some were more reluctant than others.

"Since this Chapel started we have burned thirty-two bitches and bastards. I want you to meet them now."

Mr Owen turned towards us and beckoned the actress forward. She walked out, still wearing the scold's bridle and chains. She stood beside the rostrum, took off the chains and removed the bridle.

"This lady has played ALL thirty-two of them. As you can see, she has survived."

He started to clap. Gradually more people clapped her.

"And, our daring young reporters..."

Paul and I walked out, removing our chains and bridles. The clapping became louder. Mr and Mrs Owen and the actress joined us in a group hug.

"In next week's paper," Mr Owen said, "the real truth of this Chapel will be printed. No bitches were burned. We just like somewhere where we can join our friends for a quiet drink. And now... Paul?"

Paul pulled me out of the hug. He dragged me forwards in front of the rostrum. What was he doing?

As he dropped to his knee, I knew. He wouldn't! He couldn't!

He did. He asked me to marry him in front of the assembled congregation. They cheered when I said "Yes!".

+++

Our news report was on the front page next week. It was a sensation and our sales increased by half for that week. Inside, on the Announcements page, an engagement was discreetly listed. In an editorial, the Editor congratulated us on our engagement and on our appointments as staff reporters. Our appointments were shown as backdated five months although very few noticed the backdating.

The Chapel is still the BTB Chapel and membership increased. We are now full members and honorary Deacon and Deaconess. The actress? She still features there as a very competent burlesque artiste.

When we married we had the reception at the BTB Chapel.

The End