All Comments on 'By His Reputation Ch. 01'

Thanks for your first story. It was a nice interlude. Her scrambled thoughts at the door were a great touch. Try to find an editor or second reader to catch rough spots. At the beginning, I'm not sure if he has a wife and child who are away or is single. His shirt changes from black to purple. Things like that interrupt the story flow. The ending jumps to implied relationship rather quickly. Perhaps ending on the hope of a relationship would fit the circumstances better?

I would also suggest using good old past tense. It is generally more comfortable for readers. Again, thanks for sharing with us.

I enjoyed this one, and thanks again. It was a bit clunky in places but overall a pretty good effort. Please keep writing -- it is the only way to improve, and as Anonymous says, it might be a good idea to get some assistance with editing.

Nice work -- four stars.

It was an enchanting story, very fast paced. Her inner monologue was very realistic the whole thing was quite vivid. Although I confess I didn’t pick up the colour change of his shirt that somebody else mentioned. Delightfully erotic.

Tess (uk)