All Comments on 'Castles in Spain Pt. 02'

Much better than part 1...A good ending, with all the characters well defined...4* for this part...3* for the whole story...

Dump the garbage, build a new life. Just the way I like it. Always wanted to see a "cymru" tag. What's a "cymru," eh, precious? Good on you.

First, the backstory between Utter Cock and his mother wasn't needed. Then all the sudden his name is actually Pete, not stand. There was more, but the oddly stilted writing was tough to follow along with.

Always loved your stories and your technique.

You thought the backstory wasn't necessary? I thought otherwise. Which is why I wrote it.

And stand wasn't his name. His name was Stan. Short for Stanley.

It's British English. And we spell words like Color funny, too.

To that BoZo Amon who missed where "Stan" can from, all I can say is don't skim, the explanation was in the story.

I enjoy your stories but this one has been posted somewhere on this site before. I don't know where.

It may be a re-post of one of yours but that has not been made clear. A little concerned with an author I like..

Great redux.

I'm not sure what to make of it. It just seemed to ramble from one unbelievable event to another. And the relationship between Stan/Pete and Myra never seemed very deep, emotional, or important. Just makes you wondered why they bothered to get married in the first place.

Oh well, thanks for the effort. I hope it was good for you.

If Stan/Pete had spent the three years in coma, his hard struggle back to full recovery might have provided considerably more opportunity to bury Myra in guilt and regret. Especially if Wanda was assigned as his therapy nurse and Myra had to watch their love slowly developing over time instead of just being surprised by it at the end.

And should have told us more about where Myra's new job was. If readers were confused by "Cymru," imagine what "Ystradgynlais" would have done to their heads. :)

For the read.

and still all the knowledge was not dangerous, anymore. TK U MLJ LV NV

its better than anything i've ever submitted (;

I expected the worse but I was pleasantly surprised. He moved on to a better life and wife and she moved away to become the skank she was meant to be. Alone.

that may be the most magnificent phrase i've ever read on the internet.

Or get-off-the-stage line; whichever.

I do not believe your final treatment of pussyhound was remotely believable-I am more than willing to imbibe of the fantastical concoctions on this site but that guy needed PAIN

Dr scum of the Earth was not a child when his mum whored him out . He p a willing participation in fucking rich adulterous sluts . Another case of physco-cologists playing the poor him take no blame for your actions retards . Peter should have destroyed the arsehole and the hospital . Hospitals lose a lot of grants and donations from bad publicity .

on the same thing Wanda rides in, TK U MLJ LV NV

Excellent second part. Great to see Myra dumped by everyone and forced to live out her life as a cheap whore. Good on ya, Pete!

.. story and good balanced ending, no 'burning' needed from him, she did it all herself.

After reading the first part of this story I hoped that Stan /Pete would recover and proceed with his plan to leave his wife. This was even better. Pete left her, found a new love, and Mara realized the loss of what could have been her life.

It's not just that your characters are one dimensional cartoons.... Caracatures of real people.... It's not 5hat your scenarios make little real world sense... And its not that you tend to do 180 changes of what they are to suit your plot turns... It's that your stories have no angst... You're just not a good storyteller... It's what the commenter meant when he said that your style is stilted... Ive read plenty of british writers that I've enjoyed plenty... It's about flow... And the ability to emerse your readers in the story... You don't have that... Reading one of your stories is more like reading a "decsription" of events rather than a story... As always... Jmo

-jaye-

Go read Matt Moreau. He's got some angst for ya.

Was a great ending, but i agree somewhat with the anonymous from before that your stories are relating facts rather than telling a story whivh makes you feel what the charqcters are feeling. Your a great writer but thats an area that wouod enable you to be better.

Each writer has his or her own style, indulges in more or less introspection, more or less character development. Mattblack keeps the reader interested and the story flows well. I rate this one a 5.

Very good save of a story whose first part kissed me off. Myra will die a lonely old whore just as she deserves.

Thanks for righting the ship.

it doesn't follow the first chapter correctly. In chapter 1 there aren't mentioned the insults from myra to her husband that are mentioned.

Well, spending the hollidays with lover instead of husband makes reconciliation nearly impossible.

Sorry for writing as Anonymous. I'm trying to activate my account since July 2019, but didn't get support from LIT, Manu or Laurel so far. If you want to help me create a Thread in the Tech-Support-Forum, contact me: infosauger@gmx.at

The first story was a lot better than this one. Myra never told him all that stuff he repeated to Wanda, and was Wanda a brain specialist ? Anyway there was no mystery in this story just a complete turnaround from the original. It was obvious what was going to happen as soon as Wanda was brought into this second part. Wish you had thought this better instead of rushing to write a sequel.

Started strong but became boring by the end.

Wanda saved him and picked up what Myra dropped. Shaoil mi gu robh a ‘Ghaidhlig duilich.ach Cuimris do-dheanta.

Solid story across the board - 5*

A homophobic Taff....no surprise really.

Not the ending I was expecting from this author. However it was an enjoyable conclusion.

Well, it really is a BTB story. She did not come out of it faring well.

***Thanks for the read.

Mild BTB. Neither Wanda , nor Dr Cock paid enough for their actions.

Stan/Pete asked for and got about everything he asked of Myra who bestowed upon him... cuckoldery and whimpery. Until his accident and probably well beyond, even with Wanda, his victim mentality dominates. Wanda will boost his ego for a while, then she will take over because he will give her his power.

Respectfully, your writing is about 3rd grade level. I still rated average in spite of your incredibly annoying use of the old cliche that frequent sexual trysts in hospitals is common- so not true!

This second part was much better and enjoyable read. thank-you for it

AMAZING story!!!!! Congratulations!!!

"finish off your rival for your wife's lover" - LOL, "rival for your lover."

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"I never wanted him to be hurt, I didn't want to break up his marriage." - Yet, he had Myra reveal the affair?

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Raff's wife never questioned all the job changes?

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€1,500 seems like an awfully small fine.

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"the information that you need to make a decision that will be right for you and also, hopefully, for Myra." - Who gives a fuck about Myra?

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"Why the fuck would he want to reconcile with someone like that? How could he?" - Exactly.

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MUCH better than Part one!

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I'm not normally a fan of back story, but it worked here, and in the right place, to explain the present.

I had to give high marks for the Welsh alone. Actually, that was a good story and it went credibly in a direction that I did not anticipate.

Affairs in hospitals, law firms and defense forces like the army are extremely common. Raff had a crap upbringing well boo fucking hoo, thats no reason to be a cunt. Myra is scum on 2 legs, becoming the local whore is fitting. Stan and Wanda are good people and its good to see good people ending up together.

waste of time reading this. thanks for your writing effort though..

Bri'ish humor.

Anon 6 mon ago, it's Cuisine you idiot 😂 which you're obviously not tried lately.

Story's good too.

What a dumb story, well below your usual standard

Couldn’t connect with any of the characters in this story series. The Stan/Pete thing? What was that?

Anon, the Stan/Pete thing is fully explained in the story.

There seemed to be a large personality shift between parts 1 and 2. IRC part 2 came out a couple of years after part 1 which might explain it. Overall a good plot, well written

The story definitely feels disjointed between the two, thankfully reading the comments I see why. Big gap in writing with the author quite improving in the intervening years. Great story, I liked the twist with the "bastard" of the story coming out as one of the more sympathetic characters, probably the most interesting too with his background with his mother's antic and his father's death similar to Stan/Pete's accident. The wife Myra definitely ended up with zero sympathy, a pretty reprehensible character in the first story but if anything worse in the second. 5 stars for this story while the previous chapter was a average 3.

"riding out of your marriage on another mans cock" a great way of putting it.