by BlueLegume
That was the most well-written enjoyable story I think I've ever read on Literotica. Thank you so much you're a gifted Talent!
Thanks for the feedback, guys! I'm glad (most of you) liked it. I have not written a sequal, but I think I will (you--and by you I mean I--kinda have to be in a certain mood to write this sort of thing, and I just haven't been, lately. Sorry).
Palewriter: I definitely understand. I actually have read one excellent present-tense, second-person novel ("Halting State" by Charles Stross) but I have neither the courage nor technical skill to try something like that, so no worries. I am not entirely sold on the present tense, either--I kept switching back and forth (a bad habit) and kinda settled on present tense because I'd written the first part that way. I do like the sense of immediacy that it has, but it creates some awkward phrasing at times as well.
The first person is really just because, for whatever reason, I feel much more comfortable writing in the first person. I'm not sure why. Maybe the next one will be first person past-tense. I wouldn't count on a proper third-person story from me for a while, though.
Anyway, thanks for the feedback.
A fun romp that well written. I would love to read more about these characters just to see if they can find something other than just yoga and sex to draw them together.
at least you didn't do 2nd person present tense. Others will find this wonderful but I just couldn't get through it. Thanks for the submission though.
This story is gold. Absolutely perfect! Short enough, but the buildup is amazing. Completely and utterly amazing. And this story is also begging for a part 2. Seriously consider it. I, and I think many others, would read it in a heartbeat.