All Comments on 'Chain Reaction'

Fantastic squeal of the story Plz continue. thanks for sharing.

This was great I love the way the Mom's got the love of their son's

I enjoyed being with me son

Loved how she seduced her son so aggresively and he was powerless to resist her. Reminds me of my son and I and how he ended up with a sister... ;)

I love a good Mother/Son incest story, unless the Father gets fucked over in the process. That ruined it for me. It would have been better if you spent some time painting Frank as such a complete asshole that he could not rate any sympathy.

Like Loving Wives stories, I like to see consequences when they are due. And they are due in this one. I wonder who is going to pay the bills. Jack could find his education coming to a screeching halt and he and Sue could be out in the street. If I was Frank I would do whatever it took to not give them a dime.

You could've used the line "It's not sex if you wear a condom" as a way to paint Frank as the asshole you want him to be. Make some backstory to where he was having an affair but always told Sue that "It's not sex if you wear a condom". You could add to the ending of the first chapter when she tells Jack "Oh, and you were right."

Personally, I like the story, but the grammar and spelling really needs to be worked on. Use one of the free editor's around here and you'll be able to take this story on for a few more chapters.

a proof reader!

a story like this needed to mention the original mom's name more than once, IMO.

good story but you had some of the same typos but if you want help with editing I can help you

hopefully, more to come. thank you!

i actually really like your writing style on this story

for me the errors add to the reading experience.

fantastic imagination running riot , superb plot , wonderful protagonists

looking forward to reading more of your work

xxxhugsxxx

p.s

am sure many of those mistakes were deliberate , just to wind people up and get feedback / comments . lol

Your stories are good and very hot. You have a good sense of dialogue and use it well but minor errors interrupt the flow. Indefinate pronouns sometimes cause confusion as to which character you are refering. Your stories would benefit from a decent editing.

Keep at - your stories are interesting.

I love the way you put that together. Thank you.