All Comments on 'Chris's Adventure of His Sex Life'

Bad sentence structure. Bad syntax. Horrible writing. Starting with the first line.

"Chris drives his car in high miles in hope to arrive at college." I assume you mean: "Chris drove his car at high speed hoping to arrive at college on time." Or, "Being late for class, Chris drove dangerously fast. He hoped to get to college in time for his first class."

I did not even make it past the horrible first paragraph due to the writing style.

if English is not your main language, please get an editor for your work, if it is your main language please try harder in school!

I couldn't make it through the whole story.

I tried - I REALLY tried - to read this story. But even as an English Major with extensive experience in editing and rewriting stories and technical manuals to a standard rarely seen nowadays, I was unable to see any way in which the plot could be rescued: "Bollywood meets Functional Illiteracy" was the only title that sprang to mind.

Sorry, not even the most desperate of Mumbai porn producers would go for crap like this. Nor would anybody, no matter HOW stoned, be able to fully understand the author's intentions....

This item deserves a negative value in the voting selection.

From the name of the author DeafGuyporn I suspect that the writer is actually deaf and that sign language is his first language. Sign language and English is quite different, hence the "bad" English. Give the guy a break!

For those giving negative comments, read the name of the author. He is trying, much better than some of you anons. Nice attempt. Give it another go. If you have a friend that could help you it will help. Don't listen to the negative people on here.

Story line is just okay but it is obvious you have poor command of the English language. Pronoun tenses do not match and that makes reading your story difficult.

I liked it, and hope you keep going. Ignore the mean comments and keep trying, you'll get it in no time!

Actually, this piece does adhere to the grammar and syntax of sign-language. Perhaps the ignorant would have gotten it if the author had made the main character deaf. To me, this is no different than writers who use deliberate dialect in their pieces. I think it was a good first submission. I do think there may be a few issues with pacing, but that probably reflects my own preferences. Keep at it!

Wow, you people are ignorant. Yes, Deaf people use ASL to talk to each other (and to Hearing friends and family members who know ASL). But a Deaf person still has to function in the Hearing world, which means they need to be able to read and write in English effectively. It's not like Deaf people aren't taught English or something.

Plain and simple, this guy is just terrible at writing.