All Comments on 'Christmas Lover'

Your stories showcase so much intimacy along with the erotism. Thanks for another treat!

... I can't give it seven or eight

Aspiring authors ought to read this story and see how she (I assume the author is a woman) does it. My comments for the first page and a half follow

For a work done in the author’s second (or subsequent) language this story is remarkably well paced with much better use of words than almost all stories on this list. I think it is not the author’s first language because the (1) language is so precise, and (2) the almond in the rice pudding screams “Norskie” or maybe Dane. Doesn’t matter; I wish I could write so well even in my own first language.

I’m typing this comment as I read the story; your obvious ability and effort demands that I do that much (don’t often see it on this list)

I like the opening line; one (an author) always needs a hook, and this was a very good one.

Maybe you could give a hint – just a hint, not an outright statement – of Jenny’s age and experience early in the story, and at least some hint of Eric’s age and station in life. Are these two students? Are these two middle aged victims of life? The beer belly comment suggests that neither is still a student. (added later: note to HHM: don't be in a hurry - the author does just that in her own sweet time)

“ "A little hand job would surely solve your problem," she said as she stepped away from him. "Or you could get yourself a fake vagina," she smiled as she pulled her coat tighter around her body and walked away.”

OOOOH! That hurt, or at least it should have.

“ "We're not done yet," Eric warned her before he walked inside to dress himself for the contest. “

____________________________________________________________

But my dinner is, and so I have to cut this review off now. I have not before read any of this author's stories – mostly because I dislike serials – but ...

This is really good. I am less than halfway through – I doubt that the rest will disappoint me

thank you for sharing it with us

Hi

I just wanted to thank you for the wonderful (and enlightening) comment that you left on my new story.

And you're absolutely right: English isn't my first language and I'm female.

Still, I never suspected that I would reveal myself by writing too precisely. All I can say is WOW, and that I'll literally be floating around on pink clouds for a few days :-)

Ada

So happy to read a new story from u.

The pace is good and the banter of the 2 character is witty.

Please write some more.

Kept my attention from begining to end. Love the banter always helps build the sexual tension. Just what I was wanting to read. Thank you.

Great story...readable, realistic, amusing and arousing....what more does a guy with a low attention span like!

I love reading your stories. I like how much the guy cares for the girl. I hate reading stories where the girl chases the guy. Your style of writing is really nice.

Fucking great story... i want to read more of ur work like this

playing a junior high little girls game? then before first page is over the SOB jerk is whoreing on her??? well maybe she is REALLY STUPID...

Don't listen to Anonymous, I never read anything about Eric whoring around on her in the story AT ALL!! Please keep writing, I loved it!!

I don't like jerks like eric or idiots like jenny for allowing the jerk to control her...NOT Erotic!!!

Great love story; great sex!

This story is over 12 years old and displays perfectly Ada's strengths and attributes. There's a nice plot together with great writing plus the duelling dialogue between Eric and Jenny as well as leading comments from her brother and mother. Added to that are the crisp well written erotic scenes. That's what Literotica is about in my opinion.

There is a negative comment as follows:-

"MEH

I don't like jerks like eric or idiots like jenny for allowing the jerk to control her...NOT Erotic!!!"

I never read this into the characters at all. Ada makes it clear that Eric has been in love with her for years and that's the way he tries to communicate with her. Also Jenny is not allowing Eric to control her; it's her reaction to her deeply supressed loving feelings for him since 16, when he nobly rejected her as being too young and his best friend's sister, which resurrect themselves in the story. I think more could have been made of how she suddenly acknowledged these feelings and decided to go for it, but it can be read in the storyline.

Def 5 stars from me

Part of what makes your stories, and this one in particular, so enjoyable, is that there is at first a resistance between the couple that has to be worn down. And when it is worn down, they realize a deep-seated love for each other that then develops and blooms into a beautiful love. They achieve a depth love and the heights of passion that neither one wants to let go of -- hence he goes back with her to the city to keep their love growing and glowing! I imagine sexy Eric with a bit of sexy dark hair for his sexy chest, and imagine seeing his dark chest hair coated with snow from their fun time in the snow. She will love caressing his hairy chest. Great description of their love-making! Please write more stories!

Unlike some of the other submissions by the author, which are too short, this story is more complete, with great attention given to all aspects of the story. Five stars

I'm slowly getting through all of your stories, but I quite liked that this one was set in your native land, it provided extra warm fuzziness. ;)

I noticed you haven't made recent contributions. If you are published elsewhere, I would love to read more of your work. (Taking breaks are also amazing for the creative mind;) )

I have seen many comments about typos or language problems... they always sit with me very uncomfortably. Through the years of your writing you have done very well with the English language and it deserves high complements. I grew up with trilingual influence, it is no easy feat to convert that into writing and then to use correct grammatical and phrasing structures in multiple languages! Your writing is better than many native, unilingual English speakers. All to say, please try not to take the negative comments to heart as there are people who are capable of reading and understanding when an author is using a foreign language, and doing it well. 💗

To MangoBeaverhauszen from Ada Stuart

Thank you so much for the kind words :-) And you're right: I do like to use my own country in my stories since it's so easy to find inspiration for the settings in f.ex "Summer Lovers", "Knocked up", "Lessons in Love" and "Stuck with You". Gosh, I didn't think it was that many to be honest :-)

And I haven't stopped writing. Far from it. I've actually written 25 stories in the last two years. But because of plagiarism, I'm publishing most of my stories on other sites these days. Just check my Author page and you can find a link to my personal website. I also try to add excerpts on what I'm currently working on.

That said, I'm still on Lit and I plan to stay here for a long time :-) And if everything works out as I plan, I will post a new story for the Nude Day Contest soon. I just need to add a few more sex scenes first, LOL.

Ada

WONDERFUL STORY! I love your writing. Please write another chapter as to if they become one and have a family. 10 stars!