All Comments on 'Closing the Library'

for a first tale.

please continue. ;0)

Very nice first submission. Well done!

Best of luck to you in the contest.

DG Hear

For a first story that "didn't have enough time to be polished", this is really well polished!!!! Very nicely done. Not only was it hot, it caught the emotions, the humanity of the characters.

It made me a believer!!!

Congratulations on an excellent first submission. I hope you keep writing for us. Great first story.

a fantastic first time, cant wait for more from you another great writer.

from a couple of very good writers and rightfully so. It was a good story and I definitely hope to see more of your work in the future.

I just finished reading "Closing" and it was the best offering I have read in a very long time. It reminds me of some of the work that we have received from some of Literotica's best writers like Danielle_Kitten. The story was extremely well written. The characters were introduced casually to us, whereas in most other pieces they are introduced when they are in mid coitus! This story is fast past and contained wonderfully few explitives which were circumvented by the good use of the English language.

This is SillyPanda's first effort. It is my hope that you will continue to write at such a high level and not slip into the malaise that many other writers seem to think those of us who come to Literotica want.

Bob.

I can't thank you all enough for your comments!

This being my first submission, I had some serious doubts and trepidations but decided to take a stab at it anyway. The community has been extraordinarily welcoming, and I sincerely appreciate everyone's support!

You've definitely inspired me to continue writing and make additional submissions. Though other commitments may get in the way (sadly, frustratingly), I hope to have at least one more submitted in the next two weeks.

And thank you Bob for the feedback on language - I wasn't sure what would be too much / not enough, so I tried to keep it to what felt natural, which for me is a few possibly offensive words sprinkled in occasionally. I'm glad it wasn't too rampant, but I may pare it down further in the future.

Thank you all again, more than I can say, and happy early Valentine's Day!

This was excellent. I sincerely hope it's not your last story - please keep writing, and we'll keep reading!

Nice premise. Nice beginning. But then she's on her knees giving him a bj with virtually nothing leading up to it. Take your time, don't rush into the oral, anal or 'regular' sex. Getting there is -- for me at least -- MORE than half the trip.

Thank you very much for the feedback! It's funny, just a few moments ago I was asking other authors if they thought I could do more character development and build-up in my next submission. There wasn't really a consensus on how much was "too much," so I'll have to play with that a bit. ;)

While my stories will likely go back and forth (from fast to slow, from short to long and everywhere in between), my next one will definitely be slower paced with a more gradual build-up. Thanks again for the feedback - I really appreciate it!

Not bad for your first go. I agree, it jumped too fast for me and didn't give enough time to get to know the characters adn work up to the attraction. But it was a solid effort and I liked the unconventional locale. Look forward to reading more

Nae bad at a' for a first story. And you've set it in a library, which is a bonus as far as I'm concerned. Something about the idea of getting hot and physical in those normally quiet and calm places...

This was definitely good, especially for a first effort. You could have had him eat her pussy, especially after she sucked him off, but it wasn't necessary. It could have used a little better proofing, but that is a minor quibble. Keep up the good work.

I enjoyed this a lot, I found this written with more skill or at least care toward grammar etc than the majority on literotica. I agree they jumped in a little too quick I wouldn't risk a friendship without a small explanation lol. I wish he went down on her but thats just me. Thank you for a great library fantasy. Don't be afraid to let her scream his name or let out a keening wail of ecstasy it doesn't always need to be a moan or groan.

I love the library setting and found the story very well written. Needs more development before sex and you can never have too much foreplay. I hope there friendship can transcend into a wonderful relationship as some can. Don't be afraid to let her scream his name or let out a keening wail of ecstasy etc. It can be fun to see what all else your characters can do other than moan and groan.

I really liked this story and loved the idea of a sexy librarian. I'd love to read more of your stories. Good luck in the contest.

I did so enjoy your first sweet and sassy offering! In agreement about developing the plot a bit further. It would be nice to see more about their relationship. What led Alyssa to take this step with him? Maybe we could see her emotions and hesitations before entering the library, or even as she's standing there in front of him. Goodluck and PLEASE continue writing and submitting :)

~LunaEroticaMystica

that story was perfect. i liked teh development of the characters and it got where it needed to go....thanks

How much better than that can it get!