by MichaelPeterson
This NEEDS to be a great long series involving mom and Sam and whoever else they can get involved.
This needs to be a series. Like others have said below the mom needs to get some of her son also. She could be like the daughter and had never had a good sexual experience and her son can give her that. I laughed at the comment about him knocking them both up and think it would be great for the sister to get pregnant and them continue to farm and breed.
his domination of her ruined the loving feel of the story and made it nothing but a cheap PORNO. erotica needs to be loving and consensual with no domination.
The story is just getting good. You can't leave it hanging like this. You need to write at least another chapter if not several more. It was just getting to the good part with their mother and Sam standing in the barn door. So I hope you will continue this story I can't wait to find out what happens next with their mother and Sam looking on.
This story is simply crude and childishly written. Nobody behaves like Colin does. He's arrogant and childish, not to mention incredibly crude. Sis is simply far too unworldly to be believable.
Sorry, mate.
You totally fucked what could have been a great story by playing some warped fucking hero and raping her
does not even deserve an ace
Continue the story and let the sister learn what she really wants or needs and to need to be a submissive slut
This seemed like a good concept then the guy turns into just a standard porno jerk and the sister, who'd been made out to be nearly a complete sexual innocent, turns quickly into some type of slavish slut kitten who's hungry to work through all the Kama Sutra positions in a week or so. It's fine that she learns to embrace good sex, but to make her start talking like a dumb sex-bunny is so out of character with the gal you described that you need not have bothered to make her a semi-real sister at all.
If it's a wild and outrageous sex fantasy you want, just go right into it. Don't waste my time trying to make out that it's an innocent or normal family relationship at the start, just have your porn stud go to work on a farm and start screwing the big-titted farm owner whose husband never gave her an orgasm.
Sorry, Mikey. Try again!
I'll have to agree with the previous 'anonymous'. You really ruined the concept. It started with him being unhappy to go to the farm. Then Liv catches him wanking to porn and offers to relieve him - probably secretly wondering why it was so 'vanilla' with her husband. Then, in a little while, you turn him into a dominating rapist and her a submissive slut who loves having her nightclothes ripped off of her in her own bedroom and forced to recieve him. All of a sudden they're fucking outside, then she's 'Lady Godiva' riding naked in the rain. He's fucking her naked up against a tree (which sounds really like no fun at all for her) and Mom and Sam finding them. Fucking in the hay is uncomfortable, by the way. It is a misnomer. Fucking on a sandy beach is a fantasy too. Like hay, sand gets every damn place it isn't supposed to and if you get sand on your peepee right before trying penetration you can kiss a good time goodbye. She won't be amused. No point to a chapter two, you've already screwed up a good story. You've also already said that he plans already to fuck other girls, so she can't even pretend to count on her brother becaus he'll have to leave the farm to find them. From your description of him, his sister and possibly his mother too won't be enough for him. So you've made him a promiscous horndog bastard who doesn't even pretend to love his sister. Nice Job Stupid.
Your last chapter really brought out the real truth that Olivia really wanted sex just not the way Sam did it.......... its so HOT and arousing :) Its time to go forward and see what Mom thinks of all this ! With Colin's big cock maybe his Mom will want to try and that will cause his Big sister to act on other fantasies she really wants to do. Please more ......... thank you !!
They need to start a family and Colin needs Sister wives to meet his needs!
You gotta be a city slicker or you'd know it hurts, especially tender female skin, to lie down naked in hay and it hurts even more when in the act of fucking, her body is pushed back and forth on that hard dry grass that is called hay.
Things like that are what editors are for, in addition to checking the spelling.
Waooww! It's one among the best incest sisters/brothers stories!it's so exciting and the excitement increases when the sister starts loving being sucked and fucked. There should be a 3 rd chapter to see 1.Their Mum's reaction 2.with the "bottles"of sperm,the brother fills in her NOW horny sister,she surely will get pregnant! !!10/10.
Practically demands a sequel
Just do it justice, make it as hot as this one.
Would love to hear more of the story what does mom do what does mom say does mom join does he stay with her do they all stay together does anybody get pregnant
I like the story but I would have thought you would have done a sequal by now
AWESOME story.
Loved Mom catching them fucking.
Can’t wait for the next chapter!
Lovely brother-sister story; he gets to teach her stuff she should've known already...her husband was severely lacking!!
And, I guess she DID hear something, other than the storm...mom...&, who is Sam?
**5** Stars!! Yes!!
What a great brother and sister farm story, to bad author never wrote a second chapter, now that some real suspense came in to the story at the end..
The torn nighty is resurrected and modelled by Liv for Sam's pleasure to finish shredding it while Colin holds Liv in place with her hands over her head and Mom looks on waiting her turn.
As already mentioned the story would be improved with an additional chapter. On a personal note, an explanation of how Livvy became so sexually repressed would be nice as well.