All Comments on 'Coma'

The ending cut off all the good feelings that came from reading the story.

Pretty much a great story. The Groundhog's Day ending was a little lame, but overall a good read. Thanks.

Although I would have preferred a little more (Okay, considerably more) in the way of consequences for the cheating spouses. The rewards of virtue always look better when paired with punishment of evil. Again, I very much enjoyed your story, thank you for sharing it.

Groundhog day...? I think not. There have been many studies about coma's. There has been cases where there is complete amnesia, partial memory loss. Cases where people have claimed to live completely different lives, and even a few cases where the person woke up and spoke a completely different language fluently. Handedness has changed and personalities altered. So the believability is there. What I would like to see is the second chapter how reality compares with the dream. Was this wish fulfillment, or his brain recognizing the subconscious patterns of his mistakes?

All and all, a terrific read. Keep up the good words

Myhands316

Makes my Thursday. Very nice romantic story. Not sure the twist at the end was necessary, but, leave it to DG to take it on an unexpected turn at the end. Well done as usual!

DG, As usual your writing is more than worth reading!

Thanks!

Alan

There is no doubt that Dr Heat is one of the great writers on the site.

However it is a story title that immediately brings to mind one of the greatest stories ever submitted to the site - COMA by the brilliant Slickman. This three chapter tale submitted to the site more than ten years ago is too good to have others using the same title.

I just wish that the good Doctor had checked for other stories of the same name before he submitted this one. A writer of his talent has no need to ride on the coattails of another author while confusing our readers. Especially an author who has won so many prizes and awards (multiple A.I.R. winner, LITEROTICA winner, MANU Award winner etc.).

Even with your I'm sure inadvertent transgression we wish you well in the A.I.R. Cuckold contest.

Jacqui

A.I.R.

South Beach, Florida

Brain Dead,,,But The Mind Plays Strange Tricks. TK U MLJ LV NV

But it was slow and stilted for me.

And I didn't care for the ending. JMO.

pleeeze I doubt that DG is riding coatails even slickmans and a 10 yr old story with such a generic title can hardly be considered a coattail lol

......right up until the end. Didn't like the ending. Sorry!

I finished the story with extremely mixed emotions. Had you stopped before the "It's all in your head" moment, it would be standing alone as a wonderful, feel-good romance.

With the sudden wake up, as if nothing happened but in his head, it feels like a twist to set up the rest of the story. Even then, the build-up was a bit on the slow side to reach that kind of plot tension.

There's no doubt you have a creative mind. Don't listen to the anon talking about riding someone else's coattails - there are many stories that share the same title, especially one word titles.

But I am still left with half-fulfilled, incredibly mixed emotions. I wish you had left the last twist out, for this would easily have been a 5* story, simply for the heartfelt, romantic feelings.

Instead, I feel like you've released a half-completed story, with the bulk of the content missing. I almost feel like I wasted my time reading, thanks to that ending.

But 1* are for utter crap, and this isn't by any means bad - more like a bad execution of a wonderful idea.

I have to give you 3*, at most. I'm just disappointed by the choice to tell us, your audience and readers, "ha! Made you think it was a happy ending, huh?" It's as if you don't care that we take the time to read your story, grow attached and invested to these characters, since you just faked us out, without concluding the sudden plot development.

Take my comment as you will, it is just my opinion.

Rex

Thanks DG Hear, enjoyed your storytelling. Thought the ending was great.

"waist" should have been "waste"

"bare" should have been "bear" (as in "bear with")

Always great to see you name next to a story. Because I know a very entertaining and enjoyable read will follow. Thanks for sharing.

Hi, I'm DG Hear. As I was writing this story and got to the end I thought of throwing a little twist into it, which I did. Sorry if you didn't like it but thought "What would happen if he drempt all of this. How would his life contiue on? Would it be as he drempt or in another direction."

I thought about a sequel and decided to write one. I'm starting on it now but will not submit it till the nude day contest is over. So stayed tuned and we'll see how it goes. Thank you all for reading my stories and taking the time to comment. It really is much appreciated.

With Respect

DG Hear

As I've always said, you are the best writer on this site, and I really enjoy every story of yours that I've ever read. Besides, you were the person who inspired me to start posting my stories here. God bless you, my friend.

Gerry

Sorry, but the "dream/not a dream" angle has become a cliche, and, even for a cliche, an especially trite and ridiculous one. You took a decent story and turned it into shit. A sequel not change that.

I guess the Literotica police scared you DG. This is normally a story you would post in LW. So sorry that frontlinecaster cut your nuts off

Still a good read.

Nice twist at the end and kind of scary if Julie really is the gold-digging slut he dreamed about.

What a walk down a crooked road...a terrific tall tale tantalizing with a surprise. Don't listen to those who complain...I sure enjoyed it!!!!!

it is called The Plug, TK U MLJ LV NV

... the cute ending. Now he can ditch Julie immediately and get down to the business of his real life... assuming he's not still in a coma... hmmm... now my heads twisted around...

The fact that this reminds me of a story by Denham Forrest does not take anything away from it. I enjoy dancing the light fantastic with your words..

I found the twisted ending a problem in an otherwise excellent story, but obviously that's a matter of taste. Some found it quite wonderful. Whoever said that now he can ditch Julie faster wasn't reading: if it's all a dream, maybe in the real world Julie's wonderful and Annie's a bitch. It's the potential for that kind of turnaround that I dislike. As I said, a matter of taste.

You got me!! Wonderful story, completely different than anything else I have read here. A wonderful love story with a wicked ending. Hope his dreams come true.

DG, I've been reading your stuff for a long time. This one is a little different from your usual stuff. I really liked this story, right up until the end. Don't get me wrong, the ending didn't ruin the story for me, but it did keep me from giving it the full five stars. If you were determined to go that route, you should've written a few more pages and let us know if reality turned out to be the same as the coma-dream.

Will be sequel or not?

...I knew that I just HAD to read this story once I saw its title on the "New Stories" page.

My coma lasted for about eight weeks (actually, my wife tells me that the docs corrected her whenever she referred to it as a coma, telling her that it was just a "deep sleep"), and was the result of a MASSIVE stroke that I experienced in August of 2008.

I experienced some of the disorientation that your story's protagonist went through, but, lucky for me, my wonderful wife was there to help me through it, and through the total of eleven months I spent in various medical facilities before being discharged back home.

Back to your story, though: I enjoyed it, although I felt that the "twist ending" was a bit of a cheat and a let down rather than the gasp-inspiring moment you might have intended it to be.

I hope to read more from you in future!

-Rei

Great story up until the unnecessary twist ending that felt added only to piss off the reader.

Didn't have much emotional impact - a bit two dimensional. Thanks.

I always read a few comments before reading a story, just to make sure I'm not getting sucked into a surprise cuck story. In this case I'm not sure about the comments regarding the ending being a surprise twist. I felt it was kind of cute, and really didn't change anything. What would have been a twist . . . Have him wake up, discover Annie is his nurse, but find that his wife has been doting by his side. Now we have a twist. An elaborate dream where he falls in love with Annie, and now wondering if his wife has indeed been unfaithful. That would be a whole separate story and a very engaging one.

That may have just been the best story I've ever read. It actually brought tears to my eyes.

...I knew that I just HAD to read this story once I saw its title on the "New Stories" page.

My coma lasted for about eight weeks (actually, my wife tells me that the docs corrected her whenever she referred to it as a coma, telling her that it was just a "deep sleep"), and was the result of a MASSIVE stroke that I experienced in August of 2008.

I experienced some of the disorientation that your story's protagonist went through, but, luckily for me, my wonderful wife was there to help me through it, and through the total of eleven months I spent in various medical facilities before being discharged back home.

Back to your story, though: I enjoyed it, although I felt that the "twist ending" was a bit of a cheat and a let down rather than the gasp-inspiring moment you might have intended it to be.

I hope to read more from you in future!

-Rei

Thanks for such a nice story. The end was a bit of an infinite recursive, but that's okay. The wife gave up pretty easy- someone that cold would have been hard to be unaware of, but gold diggers have deception and larceny in their veins. Why she left for the old guy is kind of odd, though. Kudos for the happy ending- 5 stars.

One of the best stories on this site! Great stuff man!

The BEST enough said

5* You never disappoint me. TY for writing

Rather than an infinite recursion, perhaps the ending provides opportunity for a sequel. Julie has in fact been loyal. Wright is plagued by false memories due to the detailed and vivid dream, and his rehabilitation is much more difficult. Annie maintains a professional distance (partly because Julie is still part of his life), but he obliviously pursues Annie. The erotic element could be Julie's efforts to rekindle the marriage and express her continued sexual interest while he is still incapable of full activity, on the other hand there could be the protagonist's sexual advances on innocent Annie - a love triangle in which there are two reluctant participants.

Honestly this maybe the best story I've ever read and I'm not talking about literotica I mean all together I found it so much better than any published story I've ever read and this was a great story I'd love to see your work One day published! I don't look at literotica for any sexual reason I just love the amazing story's you guys come up with and I sware if I was a millionaire I'd publish ever one of your stories on this site. Great job and I want to read all your stories now!

I just read this story because it is so popular and - am I the only one who has a problem with the voice? The whole time I was reading, it was so clearly written by an old man trying to sound like young man. The main character had a personality of a sixty year old. That would be fine in a "mature" story, but....

And such a nice guy married to such a tramp? I don't buy this ridiculous angel / devil crap.

And the storyline was cliche'. I really can't understand why it is so popular. Even the sex was mediocre. The only thing I can say that was any good was the actual mechanics, but yawn. I want that twenty minutes back.

which are real. TK U MLJ LV NV

I love this story, you made angry with retelling of his story Julia but warmed my heart with the love that Justin felt for Annie. You are a talented writer!

Still gave it 4 * for the telling, knocked one off cause I felt cheated that it wasn't real.

1* because it was a dream.

Then I started looking around for JR to show up. A dream? A nightmare? A premonition? Sorry but I HATED the ending. Good story, terrible ending.

Dallas fans (TV show) know what I mean

This has been a good and enjoyable story. I just don't understand why you tacked on the ending as a modified jump back to the beginning of the story.

George in Omaha9

I so enjoyed the romance written here. A faithful womans love is a treasure beyond price. HOWEVER, the ending left me cold and spoiled all the preceding story. 1* for a literary device that ruined a otherwise truly loving story.

I know you were trying to put a twist on an almost fairy tale romance but the ending left me cold. I won't rate it a as 1 like many others as it was a good read - just not your best.

You people's that commented about the ending need to read part two.

In my favorites

Ron. Texas

The way chapter one ended was a bit of a jolt.

Ending was rather quick The Lastl chapter should get a rewrite

Just like the scene from Dallas! Too damn funny!

One of my all time favorites! Read it many times. The only thing that doesn't fit is th guys singing YMCA is a GAY standard only sung by gays or wimps...

Okay, as someone else has intimated, Shades of "Who Shot J.R.?".

I really like most of D G Hear's stuff, but the last few paragraphs of

this one took it from 5 stars down to 2.

"In my humble opinion", "dream sequences" are a cheap writer's

ploy to squeeze another chapter, or book, or TV episode out of a

story that could have been satisfactorily ended with just a few more

paragraphs, or maybe another page.

This story's ending was disappointment to me.

the brain is mysterious, TK U MLJ LV NV

Fucked up ending.

I really enjoyed your story but like others have said, the ending was disappointing.

Because of the ending it went from 5 stars down to 4.

Really enjoyed it.

Wow!!! You had such a great story going on which could have even more beautiful end but no you decided to be a jerk an ruined everything about the story in the end...C'mon what were you thinking!!!

A good tale with a 'Newhart' ending. You're bold!

A nice story spoilt by the ending.

Your "hero's" are all "hapless wonders"! SO PATHETIC!

What an awesome story. I couldn't stop reading it. Well done!!

Really enjoyed the story. Well written although a couple of errors did creep in. Personally, I didn't like the double ending but it didn't spoil it for me. Regards.

...but don´t understand about the editors in the intro - how could they miss stuff like:

I heard you'd woke up

I prefer not to talk to you

I've always drove a sporty car

she wanted you off of life support

about the porno's

they're in their twenty's.

Can you give my friend Justin and I

Dad did give me the managers

with most everyone

probably a waist of money

Bare with me, I've never done this before.

Of course, ¨editors¨ are volunteers, and in this case ¨you get what you pay for¨. I'm sure they did what they felt they were competent in.

Author does have talent and storytelling skills. Major errors, as they were called when I was in high school/university can be attributed to many factors. I don´t fault my dear wife when she asks me ´how do you spell...´. She's as educated as I am, but is smarter. Our brains, however, are different.

I do appreciate the authors´ effort.

Good story. Great twist at the end.

Great story with quite twist at the end...I loved it!!

A nice ending. A few misspellings but otherwise a great read.

Best ending to a D G Hear story. Hope the rest are equally good.

Mike the Irishman. 🍀

Decent story spoilt by the ending.

Great story, better than the first time I read it. Earns my 5 star vote.

5* until the completely unnecessary ending.

Good story BUT it reads like a newspaper article or a police report. Reminds me of Sgt. Friday on the old TV series stating: “Just the facts mam…”. This tale is basically a history; a rather dry recitation of the facts of an otherwise romantic story. The story canvas is painted in pale pastels. There are no bold vibrant strokes. No flaming reds of passion. No deep blacks of despair… Just newspaper facts that once read are discarded bird cage bottom papers.

This tale could have screamed with the despair of abandonment and betrayal. Then swept us all on those soft angel wings of rediscovered love and realized passion. Instead we are left with a meal of turnip greens when we could have had filet.

Sad because this tale had great bones.

This is a 5 ***** story, a masterpiece of love, until the last segment where Justin wakes up again from a coma. Like other reviewers have noted, that section dampens or even destroys a part of the delicious feeling derived from this writing. Please remove it and create an epilogue with a couple of little rug rats.

BJ

blah.......

Wonderful story According to Annie's actions, when he was in a coma, she was caring for her husband. She was his REAL wife...

End was stupid

would have been a 5 star if it hadn't been for the stupid ending

Five star until the last part. No. No. No.

Feel bad about it but one star. Was a 5 star story right up until the last part. The second chapter was utterly pointless too.

This is a very good story. This was however not your best ending to one of your tales. It's still a 5***** in my book. Thank you so very much for your stories. LP

So, he’s looping in a coma dream? Is the top still spinning?

Original, beautiful love story.

Ed

Outa the park with this one! Especially good was the Groundhogs Day finale. Very unexpected and creative! 5 stars

A very nice twist at the end, Thank you, I didn't see it coming.

An excellent story and , as others have commented on, the ending was quite a surprise

Awesome story ... was hooked from the start!!!

Great ending!!! Thanks for sharing!!

Julie tried to fucking KILL him and gets away with half his money? Rob gets NO comeuppance? And sorry, I know I'm in the minority, but I didn't care for the dream sequence ending.