by adamgunn
A Perfectly Reasonable Accommodation...
No one is Hurt; needs are met; what could be the Objection?
Enjoyed the Read.
This story sounds more like a biography than a fantasy the way it just flows over the years of the characters lives seems so real . The sex also seems real and not over the top like a lot of other stories . As the tale unfolded I could see how this could happen and work for the three people involved , very well written thanks for a good read .
Very nice, would love to see a second edition with the possibility of a threesome (Jon, Debbie, Doris). Great writing and technique, going to check out some of your other stories now!
Now don't get me wrong, I quite like inventive writing, but you seem to have a habit of going against Mark Twain — 'Don't use a five-dollar word when a fifty-cent word will do.'
Which wouldn't be so bad if you used the words correctly. This isn't McSweeneys (which I like). People who don't understand the words won't like ur story, if they bother to finish reading it, and people who do will be distracted by the fact that were used incorrectly.