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All Comments on 'Connected Ch. 02'
by loved4eternity
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- 4 Comments
Anonymousalmost 14 years agoDon't try to rush things so much.
Chapter one and chapter two appear to have been written by two different
people. A serious edit and rewrite of chapter two wouldn't hurt. You had a great start then lost your pacing and characterization. Keep trying.
goducks111over 4 years agovery solid continuation
David and Hope are good characters. sex is a little light, but the story is very good!
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