All Comments on 'Control: Who Wants It?'

Gave it a 4. If you didn't have so many spelling and grammar errors it would have been a 5.

Fix the grammar and spelling. Looking forward to part two.

Your first effort may have been submitted a little to soon. Proof-reading done by yourself isn't always the best thing to do. Arrange for help from an outsider - many are available on this site.

Continue with your writing, however. Just use and learn from the criticism offered from the readers.

I gave your story 4 stars based on your writing.

Missed a close quote.

"not" instead of note.

"are" instead of care.

"you" instead of young.

missing some words in the dorm paragraph

still a five, although the character development could use some work

Very Good first offering

It is great!!!

Come on, write second chapter, please!!!

Really weird. What planet do you live on?

I need more of this story.

Not bad. Pretty good. I'm loving the premise of the story. It has legs and will go far. Problem is will the journey be in uncomfortable misspellings & "errorable" shoes or in better proofreading & edited slip-ons that allow us to fully enjoy the "eroticism." I think the latter will serve you well and garner you votes of Favorite story and 5 stars. I wish you all the best.

Jessica chooses the third option, she goes to the police and reports the slut. This will make your story a little better. Or do you think your fantasy would exist in any reality?