by bicuriwhat
Probably just because I'm exhausted, and too horny for my own good, I think there is a plot hole? In the last installment it stated they broke up 6 months prior? And this one was only a month. Please correct me if I am wrong!! I love this series, and have spent the last who knows long reading it because it's also very well written and who doesn't just adore a good love story?! Keep writing, I love it!
Finally, they are back together. Some error on spelling & timing, but still good story. Thank you.
And the saga continues. There were a lot of grammatical errors so I self-corrected as I read. I'm glad to see they're back together. Love the series.
I've enjoyed reading it, and am glad they are back together. Nice job.
~ L
There are just so many things missing here, the plot holes raises so many questions that this and its previous installment become quite the confusing mess. And I don't for a second buy mandy's reasonings nor tamaras acceptance of them, no matter their emotional state.
You need to give some serious attention to the way you write dialogue. It's annoying to have to reread dialogue two or three times to figure out who's speaking. Use some tags here or there to keep it straight. Also, some non-verbal reactions would make the dialogue a lot less sterile. These issues don't just apply to this chapter - they appear in every one of this story's 12 chapters.
The pacing was kinda off. The chapter seemed rushed and thrown together. Tamara never came off as weak to me until this chapter. I feel like she wouldve closed herself off from mandy for awhile. Im happy they got back together but these last two chapters didnt gel well with the previous ones. Especially this one. Maybe its just me though. Decent job though.
I just happened to reread this chapter and noticed that you've rewrote it. You did it justice. Bravo and thanks for giving us such a great series!
I read you story twice and enjoyed it even more this time because I knew that is was a happy ending. Thank you and please don't stop writing because of a few negative comments.
Thank you so much for this ending
I keep reading it and re-reading it
It truly touches my heart
Indeed all chapters do
You truly have a great story telling gift
Thankyou
Some people are never happy no matter how hard you try. IGNORE THEM!!!!
I haven't finished any of my stories yet, but I may switch off the comments and just leave the star rating system on (if that's possible).
Write for YOU and HOPE that people like it, if they don`t, then fuck them.
A few times I thought that maybe isn`t your first language, but that was more the odd phrase here and there rather than the odd typo.
So it may not have been perfect, but I for one am grateful that you took the time and effort to write what I thought was a good tale of teenagers beginning to find their way and place in the world.
I tend mostly to only write my thoughts at the end of a series of stories, and I haven't read anyone elses thoughts on your tale except this one.
Again, thank you for writing this series and please, don`t give up :)
I too don't understand negative comments, and I'm glad you finished the story.
I know it's been years, but I miss Tammy and Mandy, and I'd love a "where are they now chapter"
lovely series, strong characters. dont listen to the negative comments!
great series! thank you for writing this part, fixed a lot of things I didn´t like about part 11.
Such a shame that negative feedback led you to finishing this lovely tale. I think you were very talented and this is one of my favourite stories.