All Comments on 'Crescent City in The Rockies Pt. 02'

Really

I'll give you two stars because the first part was decent.

Enjoyed it a great deal! A fun read.

Im not really sure WHAT happened. Was that some kind of experimental writing exercise, cause it sure went off the rails. Maybe answered some questions for all those fools who commented on the first one talking all that shit. No, this was just bad. Sorry, it was.

That bombed. I'll have to give this a two, go back and give the other part a three. I wanted to see it before I scored. This was a huge disappointment.

The Top 5 Foremost RIGHT and wrong Literary Features Employed by Jimbob44 today in my estimable and yet  HUMBLE opinion.

Legal Disclaimer: All assertions of balletristic quality are subjective and valid only in the singular and unique LSD literary reality macrocosm and all associated and apropriate adjunct domains.

1) RIGHT : The leading cliffhanger from first installment was what happened to the lush Merilee who was front and center for 3/4 of segment then vanished like Jimmy Hoffa after nuptials to Billy. The author answered that question post-haste by swapping out cerebral Vistas in diverting fashion.

I loved the morning booby - traps subplot laid out for MIL from hell : Norma who fervently believed no woman ( save one ) was worthy of her boy.Kudos.

2) WRONG : Nguyen Moo's arduous and sympathetic story took up dramatic slack when Merilee went MIA in premiere segment . I really enjoyed her spunk and  craftiness and was disappointed when she got golden parachute out of Crescent City way too early in concluding installment.  The racial and dramatic diversity quotient of story was not served by her absence.

3) RIGHT : It's tough to get readers to excuse extramarital action but Jimbob44 pitched best possible case with Marilee's abuse endured at heinous mental, physical and carnal levels before she paired up with her pére.

4) WRONG : I thought the author could have added some heft to subplot by researching  dentistry/medical practices of the day and briefly showing why Doctor Daniel as an invaluable member of community got cut slack as he hooked up with married woman and received legal benefit of doubt when summarily eradicating the two rapist cardsharps. Maybe next time.

5) RIGHT : I wondered how Jimbob44 was going to construct a dramatic climax since Merilee and Daniel romantic  union was fait accompli. Billy's inebriated and futile shotgun power ploy was thwarted imaginatively, albeit I would have had Nguyen Moo wield the disabling derringer shot ( for reasons listed above).

Bottom line(s) : I admired how author riffled off of boilerplate Western formula.  Lesbians,  Chinese comfort women and and Jocasta/odious Oedipus subplot ran concurrent with Boy meets Girl main theme. Readers had to bring A-game or else end up befuddled and confused and mired in literary ditch like comic villain Billy ( or   HarryinVa. who is a bit of a slowcoach in appreciating genre pushing Westerns ).

 Ergo the obvious rating.

Full marks * * * * *

Maybe you have to be as bonkers as Slamdog to understand it. All that yapping on the first one and then this. If you read the comments first, this one is not worth the work to read it.

...and don’t mind the analphabet crowd, JimBob ;-)

thank you for posting this. i enjoyed reading it.

It was wonderful in every way. 5 stars!

Then lets Their actions play out on interwoven paths. Kind of like life. Thanks for another wander.

Down Sydrome is not a result of inbreeding you idiot.

I felt as if I were there and knew the folks throughout this story. Very well written.

Nowhere in the story does it say, or even imply, that Down’s Syndrome is the result of inbreeding. It mentions that fictional characters had a fictional daughter who was mentally impaired. That could fictionally happen. So, there’s no point in complaining about something that is not in the story.

That said, I enjoyed the story. Billy wasn’t just a dumb weasel, he was evil. I’m sorry Merilee missed. The characters were broad and stock, but that’s what I expect from a “Western.” Iconic characters.

Thanks for sharing a great read.

Just a weak story that was a B.T.B by a sick writer.

One of the best in the go west series I read. Screw the haters. They wish they were as talented as you.

I don’t normally leave comments in this category, but I like your writing and wanted to publicly say so. Thanks JB. Hope to read more soon.

Sincerely,

Santacruzman

Entertaining, and that is all I ask for! Thank you.

"Undertaker one hauled". Really???

I want to see this in a made for TV movie.

Your writing is very descriptive. I could see the events happening in my mind's eye. Anyone who fails to laugh at Merilee's comment when she only wings her husband has no sense of humor.

And LMAO funny as well! Merilee was quite the scrapper in the duel with her wicked M-I-L! And she was lucky to hit anything at all with a derringer at any distance greater than 5 feet! ;-)

Thanks for your excursions out West, they've been fun....

undertaker {was the} one {that} hauled.... Really.

Dialect is {a} more challenging {reading task} than normal {text}... people who can't deal with it are poorly served by reading stories by this author.

For those of us who can deal with dialect, it leads a certain veritas to stories set in other times and places.

YMMV

Green-something

Very enjoyable. Thank you!

I could have done without the long recap at the start of chapter 2. Just tell them to read part 1 first! Keep it going though, really enjoyable.

The event that Randi set up was called Legends Week. as pointed out by an Anon it was a Writers Challenge, and was open to all who wanted to participate. as I see it the only true legend that responded was HDK as pointed out he is a legend in his own mind (key words in his own). LSD, I don't know you other than your comments you share which are sometimes long and boring, to you I say you too are a legend in your own mind in the comment department.

Now to the story which is why I thought was what we were suppose to be doing in this section of the story. JimBob44 I found your first half very entertaining but in this half not so much. You showed great knowledge about pulley's when the safe was lowered onto the hiding hole in the basement (bravo). I questioned the cast part and had to look it up. Over all I enjoyed it just like most of the other LW stories you have written.

If being called a legend is a requirement to posting a story then I want to be called HERO for having the nerve to stick my neck out for the butchers to swing at.

I have never met Randi so I really wish the coward that hides behind the Anon title please refrain from the racial slurs (is she even black).

JimBob44 I look forward to going back to De Grange LA soon

really--"wavos rancheros?" A minute's search on Google would have given you "juevos rancheros." That's Spanish--you know--what is spoken in Mexico and numerous other countries.

Thanks again

Surely Merilee would have called Daniel 'mon Pere' no just Pere. Wasn't Faro played in saloons in the old west more than Poker?

5*

I found this series (2) quite medium. However I believe you have the skills to improve.

you threw just about all the categories into this story, and i think bsdm may also qualify since ropes were used to move the safe and entomb her victims. you even included some of the ancestors of some of your current day lawyers in de garde. all in all, a fantastic story that matches some of your best work. i miss your usual disclaimer at the beginning of your stories though. many thanks!

Especially as you wisely chose to make a distinctly unsympathetic character to make a willing cuckold. There are far too few stories in LW that manage to do that right.

The charcters were well drawn too. I even found myself starting to like the mayor, growing a backbone but a little too late for his own good.

This was poles apart from, "Post; Three Days' Journey"

Good job.

Is often over simplified or turned into a history lesson. You walked this line with great dialogue and characters. I am wondering how the devout Papist reconciled his divorce? Like LSD I would have enjoyed having the Thai girls stick around and maybe just a bit more about Polly. 5 stars and thank you.

Some comments from people who can barely read and I would like to them write a story than critizng a very good writer . There are to many brain dead people out there.

The only suggestion is that I feel you spent too much time refreshing the beginning of this story. But, the story was first class all the way. I like your style of writing and look forward to reading more of your work.

Enjoy your story. Thanks

Non-erotic but a fantastic story nonetheless. Well Done!

The gripe I had was at the end when you said this was the end of the stories. I was hoping for more chapters. Great job!

.... from a very entertaining writer.

Oh, for the anonys glomming on to wavos rancheros:

consider the author, and the characters... the author frequently does 'dialect' in the dialog of his characters... and the characters he was speaking about when the 'wavos' were first mentioned, were not particularly well schooled, and were both fluent in ENGLISH, and FRENCH, not Spanish.....

Quit nitpickin' until you've thought about it, and then consider whether or not YOU could do as well, and just stfu about it, lol!

Thank you, JimBob, for writing these stories for your pleasure; and posting them here for mine!

one of your best

jtaylor

that someone with the requisite skill to operate a computer—even if only to find literotica.com and page through a story—would not understand this hilarious-but-heart-warming story of the Old West (with a bit of ante-cum-post-bellum NOLA thrown in for spice)? Exempli gratia, in other comments, HIV (what a serendipitous monogram that) has shown a gift for sussing out meanings, however subtle—or even unintended by the author—that outrage him; what could possibly have confused him about this story? JPB, you write good stories, cher. Next time just tell these peckerwoods to piss off, hear?

Cinco estrellas doradas.

Well done!

Very good. Thank you for sharing your stories

Dis story purta good, heeya? Me fun read. No burn no bitch round da bend when it come to da end it end, heeya? Me go now. Keep word type and go more word to type, heeya? Dey like ta see homos naked. Urrbody know dat. Guaroanteeed.

I like how you wrote HDK into the story as the wimpy cucky shit head known as Billy.

An epilogue just spoils the story. Just stop at the end of the story.

You are correct. The story ends where it finishes. Nonetheless. It is a Ripper Yarn!

5*

your a sick puppy. I will keep on reading. slap hapypapy #9

Another good story from JB44. The characters are as colorful as the story telling. I look forward to all of your offerings. Let's head back down South again real soon.

I loved this story a man wronged a strong willed women a week kneed husband a it was funny it was passionate it was advisariale it most off all it was entertaining fuckn great story

... even the second time through... :) 5*

Sub plot w/ les "fleurs tombées" Indochinoises Francaises left open possibilities.... would have enjoyed their further participation by having the plots weave together again...

Billy was a little TOO big a buffoon, but a fine feckless foil none the less.

Thank you again....

I enjoy your writing and come back to read them fairly often.

When I met Lucy in 2cd Choice I was pretty sure she was the most delightful young lady I had read about in the LW genre. Then you introduce me to Merilee and she has more balls and class than anyone else in the story other than perhaps Danial… I just can’t see how any “man” could treat either of these two darlings the way Marco and Billy treated them. But then I think I just answered my own question.

["You could have killed me," Norma hissed… "Well, I'm doing my best," Merilee said in an exasperated tone. "But you are just being so stubborn."

“Ah, you have learned to knock," Merilee smiled sweetly. "That will be cleaned off at once," Norma snarled, pointing to the greased door knob. "Then you best busy yourself doing such," Merilee said as she walked past her simmering mother in law.

"I've had the fortitude to resist snapping your dry brittle neck like a chicken, dear Mother in law," Merilee snarled. "Do not test my fortitude any further."

"Dear husband, should you gamble? Only bet what you can well afford to lose," Merilee advised…

"I'm saying, may God have mercy on your souls," Daniel said. "Did you, did you really kill those two men? For me?" Merilee demanded…

"Daniel, I do not wish to sleep alone," she said simply. "Your bed is large enough for the two of us."

"Damn it, I'd hoped to hit him in his head," Merilee complained and searched to reload the small pistol. "You could have killed me!" Billy whined… "And that was my full intention," Merilee snarled.]

I believe eveyone got what they deserved and/or needed, I do wonder what happened to Chloe. As the story goes, I was laughing my ass off typing this and wondering what you are going to do to top it. Perfect. Just Perfect. Signed: BTW

That was excellent... The merilee character was outstanding... Merilee is most definitely an ancestor of buffy the vampire slayer... I can just see merilee saying... "Have you ever heard the phrase oh god my leg, my leg"... Or... "here endeth the lesson"... Lol

-jaye-

Not a fan of westerns usually but you have such a great way of bringing characters to life that it doesn't matter the setting.

I aspire to write as well as you one day. I doubt I'll hit that mark but you are definitely influencing my stories and making me a better writer. I have been learning the simple things like naming characters and talking about what they do is enough, we can fill in the gaps without a backstory on everything. Truly masterful on your part.

There are only a few writers on this site that are better than yourself at writing, yet even they lack your imagination. Your stories are always different, varied and interesting, whereas the others are repetitive - once you've read one you've read their others.

I'm totally straight and yet even your transexual/crossdresser stories are interesting to read. I look forward to your new postings and I volunteer to be a beta reader or editor if you ever need one.

Thank you for sharing.

That was good... Loved the heroine.... I like strong resourceful women...

-jaye-

Enjoyed the hell out of this story.

chur m8 awsum story

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Well developed story, I thoroughly enjoyed it

A nice genre piece. Enjoyed this story very much.

Excellent!!! Love historical stories.

Not my usual fare, but an excellent read nonetheless.

Not my typical read, but very enjoyable. We’ll done.

Good job, thanks for sharing your work!

Need a story of the further adventures of Nguyen Moo! 5 stars

Nice job. 5* indeed.

Excellent and entertaining story among many of yours. Read some time ago, and on rereading realized I never scored or made it a favorite.

A well told tale. Thank you for your time and talent. 5 stars. DMW aka

Billy banging his mom at the end and his father not caring was a turn off. Ick. Otherwise was an interesting period piece.

Good series.

Great story. The characters and their traits were exaggerated as is done in all great stories. Have to read the other stories mentioned. Thanks.

Thanks for your writing.