Dairy Queening

About halfway through his flight, he had to make an unscheduled landing on top of an apartment building because of an urgent phone call.

"Admiral Anticrime here," he said loudly over the roar of his jet pack before its engines completely died down.

"Admiral, Sir! This is Bowen Arrow at City Hall. I don't know if you know who I am, but I'm a big fan of yours. I run the security desk at the entrance to the building"

"Yes, Bowen. I'm actually heading down towards City Hall right now. What can I do for you?"

"A supervillain just walked in here, claiming to have a meeting with Mayor Minor. Right now, I've got him waiting in the lobby. I fed him the line about how the mayor's currently busy, but I'm not sure what I should do next."

"Is the mayor busy?"

"Damned if I know."

"Which villain is it?"

"Levi Evil."

"I knew it," the superhero mumbled under his breath. "He's finally shown up to set his demands."

"What was that you said, sir?"

"Oh, nothing. Nothing. Just ... keep him there until I get there. It should only be a few minutes before I get there. I need to make one more phone call before I get back on the road to City Hall."

"Great! Thank you, sir!"

"You're welcome, Bowen. Keep up the good work."

Admiral Anticrime hung up the phone and immediately contacted the head of the Metroburgh Police Department.

"Chief Leif Speef here."

"Chief! Old buddy!"

"Admiral Anticrime? What's going on?"

"I need you to send some men down to Levi Evil's lair. He should be out, but don't be surprised if you run into his henchman, Smedley. If you do, he shouldn't put up too much of a fight, so all you'd really need to do is stun him. Once you get past Smedley, I'm guessing that there's some kind of device there, and it could explain why we're in the middle of this heatwave."

"All right, but what am I supposed to do when I find it?"

"Pictures. Get me pictures. Don't do anything unless you're sure you know what it does. Levi Evil isn't the smartest villain we've got out there, -- in fact, I'd say he's a brick short of ... a brick... You can probably trust any labels that might be on any switches or dials, but if there are no labels, don't do anything. Got it?"

"I, um... I think so. May I call you if I've got any questions?"

"Sure. I'm heading over to City Hall to see Mayor Minor but if you need me, I'll be able to take your call."

"Great! Thank you, Admiral Anticrime!"

"No. Thank YOU, Chief Speef."

The superhero hung up his phone, stashed it firmly within his super suit, and took off again towards City Hall.

Chapter 15

Levi Evil and Melanie Felony sat quietly in the waiting area near the entrance to City Hall alongside of everyone else who had been denied official entry into the building.

Levi leaned over the arm of his chair and said to his cousin, in a voice that was loud enough to make her uncomfortable, "Do you think that the mayor's really in a meeting?"

Melanie hastily shoved her cell phone back into her purse, looked at Levi, and said, "Shhhh!" before answering his question in a low whisper. "Of course not. They're just trying to figure out what to do with us. What's the name of the superhero in town?"

"Admiral Anticrime."

"That's right. Don't be surprised if he shows up."

"I won't. But if he does, how do we get the mayor's attention before he does?"

"I think you'll be able to see in about ten seconds. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Now!"

Levi and Melanie both turned to face the entrance of the waiting area but no one was there.

Melanie scowled. "I must've miscalculated. She should be here --"

"Good morning, folks." The woman's voice interrupted Melanie's oral thought-processes. "My name's Vicky Veenyveedy, and I work for the mayor. I'm sorry but he's not in a position to take any visitors at the moment, but I'd be happy to answer any questions for you or pass on any messages you might want him to know."

Levi stood there, slack-jawed. He whispered in his cousin's ear, "You're good."

"I know," she answered with a grin as she turned to face the mayor's assistant. "Vicky, is it?"

"Yes."

"I have a little gift for the mayor. Could you please give this to him?"

"Of course!"

Melanie reached into her purse and retrieved a cell phone. "Please make sure he gets this, OK?"

"I can do that."

"And here's some homemade ice cream for you. I think you should share it with the mayor before it melts."

"I can do that, too!"

"Great! Thank you, Vicky. I'm sorry we didn't get to speak with the mayor in person but I guess I shouldn't be too surprised."

"Maybe next time. Have a great day!"

"You too."

Just as suddenly as Vicky had appeared in the waiting area, she walked back into the crowd of visitors and workers milling about near the entranceway to the building, and disappeared..

The two villains started to leave City Hall and get back out on the street when Admiral Anticrime arrived at the front steps of the building.

The security guard came rushing to greet the superhero. "Admiral Anticrime! I spoke to you on the phone. I'm --"

"Bowen Arrow. Yes, I remember. I just saw Levi Evil and a companion walking out of the building. They didn't see Mayor Minor, did they?"

"No. They just stood up and started out the door. And they've been here the entire time. I wasn't watching them closely while they were in there, but I don't think they met with anyone in the waiting room, either. You don't want me to follow them, do you?"

"No. It's too dangerous." Our hero paused for a moment and then asked, "Who was his companion?"

"She said she was his cousin. I didn't get her name."

"Hmmmmm. I'm pretty sure she's someone to watch out for, too. Levi himself might be using her help somehow. At any rate, d'you mind if I go up to see the mayor?"

"Hang on a sec. Let me call up there." Bowen picked up the phone by his station and impatiently nodded his head. "Hi, Vicky. Is the mayor there? Uh huh. Okay. No meetings right now? Good. D'you think we can squeeze in Admiral Anticrime? All right. I'll send him right up!"

As Bowen hung up the phone, Admiral Anticrime smiled. "Thank you. I just need to make a quick phone call before I go in." He pulled his own phone out of its holster and tapped a few keys. "Chief! How're you doing with that project I just gave you? Great! No, I don't know why they put a self-destruct button on their devices either but it does make our jobs easier, huh? No, I don't think you've got the time to do much. Sure. Set the device to cool down then destroy it, but you've got to get out of there. Right. He just left City Hall. Don't know where he's going, but if it's home, you've got about ten minutes to get out before you're discovered."

He hung up the phone and proceeded through the metal detectors at the entrance to City Hall, completely ignoring all of the lights, bells, and whistles that flashed and rang as he passed through.

Chapter 16

Admiral Anticrime paused outside of the closed door that led to Mayor Minor's office before knocking.

A woman's voice came through the speaker adjacent to the doorway. "Oh! Hello, Admiral Anticrime! What brings you around this morning?"

"I need to talk to the Mayor. I have reason to believe that Levi Evil might be behind this heatwave."

"Ya know, it's funny. Mayor Minor and I were just talking about you yesterday, and wondering if you could investigate this weather. Give me a minute and I'll be right there. Let me just make sure he can receive you, if you don't mind."

"Take your time." He felt a little bit uneasy about saying this to Vicky, knowing that he had seen her on the security cameras from the diner the night before, but he also knew that he didn't have much choice.

*****

Vicky ran into the mayor's office. "Sir! Admiral Anticrime is here. I need you to finish off that ice cream quickly."

Mayor Minor quickly took the last two bites of the ice cream and swallowed them.

"You might want to wipe your mouth. I'll take your cup, if that's all right."

"Sure," he said as he retrieved a moist towelette from his desk, using it to clean his face. Once done, he threw the thin sheet into the empty cup of ice cream, which his assistant promptly retrieved.

She told the mayor, "I'll bring him right in."

"Great! Thank you, Vicky!"

On her way back to the door, she threw the trash into the bin underneath her own desk and proceeded to the door, behind which the superhero awaited.

*****

Vicky escorted Admiral Anticrime into the mayor's office. "Thank you, Vicky," said the superhero. "Now would you please wait outside of the office? What I have to say is between me and him only."

Vicky looked at the mayor, who nodded his agreement. She curtsied before the two men before turning on her heels, walking out of the office, closing the door behind her, and returning to her desk.

"It's so hard to find good help these days," sighed the mayor. "But Vicky's among the best."

Admiral Anticrime inhaled deeply and sat down in front of the mayor. "Sir, I... I'm not sure how to tell you this, but..."

"What is it, my man?"

"I ... I have reason to believe Vicky might have been compromised."

"What? What do you mean?"

"There was an incident last night at Jake's Steaks last night. The full details are a bit sketchy but it's clear that two people were overcome by one of the town's supervillains in the middle of their meal last night. I'm reasonably certain that one of those two people was Vicky."

"Are you saying I should fire Vicky?"

"I really can't tell you to do that. But if she starts to act suspiciously in any way, you'd be well-served to distance yourself from her."

"Why don't we just talk to her?"

"That's not a good idea. Think of police procedure. If Chief Speef thinks someone might have committed a crime, he doesn't just go out and arrest that person; he watches what that person does. If the evidence points to that person, then he arrests him. But usually the person doesn't know he's being watched until the arrest. So you've got to make sure Vicky doesn't know you suspect something. If something's up with Vicky, I'm sure it'll present itself somewhat soon."

"But if it does, wouldn't I be in some kind of danger right then and there?"

"Only you can manage to that risk."

"I see." The mayor looked down at his watch. "I've got a meeting with Rudy Doody soon and I'd like to get ready. I'll think about what you've said and I'll call you if I have any questions."

"Perfect."

"Do you know which supervillain might be pulling the strings?"

"That's the catch. I'm not entirely sure. Nobody saw exactly where Vicky went, but no one's lair is anywhere near Jake's. At least, not as far as I know and I thought I knew all of our villains. I don't have any hard proof behind this, but it seems like Levi Evil's been making a few strange moves lately."

"Ya know, it's funny. Yesterday I was wondering if Levi might've had something to do with this heatwave. But it's not like him to do something like that and be silent for this long. He'd have come forth with his demands by now, don't you think?"

"Well, he was downstairs when I got here."

"Really?"

"Yeah, but he was on his way out when I got here. Him and a female companion."

"That's odd. Why didn't I know he was here? Surely he'd have asked security to let him through."

"Oh. Well, one of your security guards might've gotten a bit overzealous and called me."

"Goddammit!"

"No. It actually turned out for the better. One, I was already on the way here, and two, it gave me the chance to dispatch Chief Speef to his lair. Looks like he did have some kind of weather machine. I gave him the authorization to push the self-destruct button."

"Why do so many villains put buttons like that on their inventions?"

"Beats me. Probably so that the evidence of their wrongdoing can be destroyed, too."

"It still makes thwarting them a lot easier."

"Too true."

"So who was this female companion of Levi's?"

"No clue. I suspect she's the key to something if we can find out who she is. D'you think you can see if you can find anything out about women who might hang around with Levi Evil?"

"So you think that the incident at Jake's and Levi's weather machine are somehow related?"

"No proof on that, but when you've been working on things like this as long as I have, you learn to recognize patterns and when the pattern is out of place. In this case, we're looking at the pattern of Levi Evil. He doesn't usually wait for long before telling us his demands. But if someone -- an unidentified woman, by chance? -- might be pulling the greater strings, who knows what we could end up with?"

"Who knows, indeed. I'm going to get ready for my meeting with Councilman Doody now. Do you have anything else?"

"Nope. That's it."

"Great, then. Thank you, Admiral Anticrime. I appreciate all you've told me."

"No. Thank you, Mayor Minor."

The hero turned and strode confidently out of the mayor's office. As he walked by the mayor's assistant's desk, he said, "Have a great day, Vicky!"

"You too, Admiral Anticrime."

Once Admiral Anticrime was no longer nearby, Vicky picked up the phone and dialed a number. "Hello, Mistress! Yes. Admiral Anticrime just left. Uh huh. Exactly. No, I don't know, you'll need to talk to him. Yes, he's alone in his office right now. His next meeting? In about fifteen minutes. Right. I can do that. Yes, that would be a great idea. Thank you, mistress."

Not long after she hung up the phone, Vicky heard the new phone for the mayor ringing. She slowly stood up and peeked around the corner at her boss. She felt a burst of pride, watching him fall out of his chair and onto the floor in a fetal position before he stood up, with a completely blank and mindless look in his eyes. Vicky smiled at the recognition that he had completely turned himself over to her mistress.

Chapter 17

The speaker of City Council arrived on time for his 10:30 meeting and greeted Vicky with a smile. "Is the Mayor ready?"

"He was on a call a few minutes ago, Sir. If you'll give me a minute, I'll check and see if he's off. Would you mind please waiting right there?"

"Sure."

Rudy sat down and watched Vicky stride across the corridor to the mayor's door. He let out a deep sigh as he watched her move her ass in a slow, sultry pattern. He heard her exchange a few words with Mayor Minor, but he couldn't quite make out what either one of them was saying.

After a moment, however, Vicky had returned to greet him and said, "Mayor Minor will see you now. If you'll just come with me..."

"Of course." He stood up and followed her to the mayor's office.

Once they reached the door, Vicky gave a grand gesture and bowed before the two men.

"Thank you, Vicky," said the mayor.

"You're welcome. Do you mind if I take a quick break? I figure I wouldn't be gone for more than five or ten minutes."

"Go ahead."

"Thank you," she said as she left the two men to their discussions of the current political climate.

Chapter 18

Vicky stepped out of City Hall and was pleasantly surprised to feel that the heatwave had broken. She looked up at the sky and felt that, with the clouds overhead, it could start raining at any minute. She quickly ran to the ice cream stand and purchased enough ice cream for herself, the mayor, and Mr. Doody.

On her way back into the building, she paused to take a phone call from her mistress.

"Yes, Mistress?"

"You've done well. I have a proposition for you."

"What's that?"

"A proposition is an offer or a proposal, usually with the promise of some general improvements in the life or status of the person being offered the proposition."

"Thank you. I'd never heard that word before. So kind of a ... proposition are we talking about?"

"How'd you like to be my henchwoman?"

"I'd love it!"

"You just bought some ice cream, right?"

"Yup. I'm hoping to have a little fun with Mayor Minor and Councilman Rudy Doody when I get back inside."

"That's what I like to hear. Well, after you have your fun, I want you to tell Mayor Minor that you got a job offer you couldn't refuse, and that you'll stay on until he can find a suitable replacement. Can you do that?"

"I sure think I can."

"Oh, and I want the news of your resignation to be very well-publicized. The more places that know about it, the better. But if anyone in the press asks you where you're going, just say that you'll know more when you start working there."

"As you wish, my mistress."

"Very good. Now have fun..."

"Oh, I will. I absolutely will."

Chapter 19

Vicky burst into the Mayor's office as though no meeting were taking place.

"Vicky! Is everything all right?" asked Mayor Minor.

"Yes. Sorry for the interruption, but..." she paused to catch her breath. "It ... it looks like the heatwave is over. It's cooler outside, a lot less humid, and it looks like it might start raining!"

"Excellent news," Rudy said, smiling broadly.

"Sonofabitch pulled it off," mumbled the mayor under his breath, recalling his meeting with Admiral Anticrime.

"What'd you say?" asked the councilman.

"Oh, nothing."

After a short pause, Vicky pulled a small box out of a brown paper bag that she was still carrying. "Ice cream?"

"Yes, it is," said Rudy.

"Would either of you like some?"

The mayor immediately said, "Yes."

"I'll have some too. Do you have a bowl or anything?" said Rudy.

"Who needs a bowl?" said Vicky as she sat down on the edge of the desk, opened the box, dug her fingers into the ice cream with one hand as she raised her skirt with the other, before rubbing the ice cream onto her pussy. "I can be your bowl," she said with a gasp as the temperature of the food made her shiver.

Rudy pushed his chair backwards and stared at the site of the mayor's assistant spreading her ice-cream covered legs right in front of him.

"Is everything all right, Rudy?" asked the mayor, who regarded this turn of events as commonplace and not out-of-the-ordinary.

Amazed at having been asked this question in the first place, the councilman paused for a moment, then turned to face the mayor. "All right? Your secretary's asking me to eat ice cream off of her nearly-naked body and you're asking if everything's all right?!? Do I even need to answer that question?"

The mayor placed his hand on the shoulder of the councilman and smiled.

Rudy jumped again, caught off-guard by the fact that the mayor now stood just inches away from his own chair.

Mayor Minor said, without a hint of irony, "I think you do..." as he gazed deep into Rudy's eyes. "In fact, I'm worried about the fact that you haven't had a taste of any of this delicious ice cream."

Vicky let out a low moan, biting her lip to prevent herself from expressing any discomfort at the cold over her very exposed skin. With a gasp, she said, "Which one of you's first?" without looking at either one of them.

Mayor Minor answered her immediately. "Rudy here will be first. Won't you, Rudy?"

The mayor's piercing gaze, coupled with a mysterious glint, quickly made the councilman's concerns and objections wash away. Before Rudy could think or say anything else, he felt compelled to kneel before the writhing young woman on the mayor's desk. He took a deep breath, stuck out his tongue, and began licking the ice cream off of her body with a fervor he normally reserved for the most passionate debates on the floor of city council.

Vicky yelped, moaned, and screamed her own wordless vocalizations as the pleasure coursed through her body. She wrapped her legs around the councilman's shoulders and guided his face and tongue to the spots most in need of his attention.

She began to shudder and tremble as she flailed wildly about the mayor's desk, pushing papers onto the floor.