Darleen...

"It would have been, but she's leaving the state today, her father was transferred and she's going to college where she's moving. And I will never see her again." I was almost in tears. Thanks mom for making me realize that...again.

"I'm sorry to hear that dear. I'm sorry I brought it up."

"That's all right, I need to deal with things like this in my life. I'm going to bed I was up all night. Good night Mom."

"Good night dear, sweet dreams."

I waved at her as I went down the hall. I tossed and turned, but eventually fell asleep.

The next night I took Jane out for dinner. I had found Darleen's letter as I was dressing and put it in my pants pocket. I was going to read it at dinner. Jane was in a good mood. We talked for hours. Then I pulled Darleen's letter.

"What's that?" Jane asked.

"Darleen gave me this before she left last night and told me not to read it until tonight."

"Well go ahead, I'll wait."

"No, we've been here long enough. Why don't we go home? I may need some cheering up to make it through the night."

"Okay, I'm up for that."

So we left and went to her house. I parked out front instead of my parent's driveway. Once in the house, we sat in the living room. Jane was beside me as I took the letter out and opened it. It was handwritten in a very nice cursive script. A girls hand had penned this letter. I smiled at the neat penmanship.

Dear Don,

First, let me tell you how much I wish I could be with you. I love you. That shouldn't be a surprise now. I know I was going to tell you as we danced. I went there to dance with you and tell you I loved you before I left Chicago. No, I'm not going to tell you where I'm moving or going to school. I want too. I want too so you will come see me, but I don't want to have you pining for me every time we part.

I will think about you every day until I can't stand it. We both know that we have to get on with our lives. I hope your life brings you happiness and love. I know you will want that for me, so please, please, think well of me. I was in love with you for four years. I should have told you long ago, but I was afraid. Maybe things would have turned out differently. Maybe not. Go on with your life. Fall in love. Make love. Please be happy, for me. And be happy for yourself.

By now you should know I sent Jane to you. She told me that she kind of had a crush on you, because you never treated her like a piece of meat, like so many other guys who only saw the girl next door. I also watched how you looked at her...with lust and as a friend. So I asked if she would do me a favor and take you to bed for me. I will be thinking of what you are doing to her as I fall asleep. That's how much I love you, my dear.

I will tell you now. My friend last night wasn't a friend it was my older sister. I confided in her about how I feel for you. We talked at length. I was all for giving myself to you last night, but she talked me out of doing that. I realized it would have been a big mistake. Just so you know, I'm still a virgin. She has agreed to accept one letter from you and forward it to me. I will reply once unless you tell me not too. Her address is on the back of this letter. Go there, knock on the door, she should be home during the day. If she isn't just tape it to the door. She will forward it to me. She will just forward one letter to me, any others she will toss in the garbage.

I love you with all my heart as I write this and it pains me to leave you.

All my love,

Darleen

I handed the letter to Jane. She was surprised but started reading when I nodded at her. As she read she sighed several times and sucked her breathe in once. When she finished she handed it back to me. I folded it neatly and put it back in the envelope. That night we made out and fucked all night, again. It was incredible. Jane was so responsive to anything I did to her. That night she made me take her anal cherry, so to speak. It was so sexy pounding into her ass. She made me do it face to face. She wanted to be able to kiss me will I plunged into her. When I finally came inside her, I went for the warm washcloth and cleaned her. Then I ate her pussy.

The next day I wrote Darleen my answer to her letter. I let Jane read it, she cried. I nodded as she said it was beautiful. I drove over to her sisters and knocked on the door. She answered right away. She even invited me in.

"Let me introduce myself," she said leading me into the kitchen. "My name is Carol and as you know I'm Darleen's older sister. She confided everything to me and I to her. We were very close and I will miss that and her very much. Maybe not as much as she and you will miss each other, but a lot."

"Thank you," I said pulling the letter from my back pocket.

"Oh, you did write her back. May I read it? Please? Don't worry, I promised to send it to her no matter what you wrote and I keep my promises to my baby sister."

"Sure, I have no problem with you reading it." I wanted her to read the letter if she hadn't asked I would have insisted.

"Thank you," she replied opening the envelope and pulling the letter out. She started to read and she looked up at me every few seconds her eyes full of tears. By the time she finished she was crying. "You know this will make her cry?"

"You're the second person to tell me that. That's not what I was looking for. I just wanted to tell her how much I love her and that I will think of her every day and hold a place in my heart for her."

Suddenly, Carol was hugging me fiercely. I could feel her tears against my cheek. She finally stepped back looking up into my eyes.

"You are just as Darleen described you. Why didn't you hug me back?" she asked.

"I don't know you. And you surprised me."

"So if you knew me and I didn't surprise you, you would have hugged me back?"

"Assuming we were friends, yes. You did seem to need comforting, I probably should have hugged you back, but like I said you surprised me."

Then she was hugging me again. I gently placed my arms around her and patted her back. She stepped away.

"Very good, you pass. You may come over anytime you would like and drop off a letter to Darleen. I will send it on for you. But don't get your hopes up, she told me she will only respond to you once and made me promise to only send her your first letter."

"Then why are you going to send any more to her?"

"I like you. And I know my little sister loves you very much. And I know you love her. A word of advice, don't write more than once a week and keep them light and friendly. Keep telling her how much you love her. And always end them like you did with this one, so she tears up. I don't know how long I can keep sending them to her without her just throwing them out, but I will."

"Thank you, Carol," I told her.

She smiled at me. Then walked me to the door. At the door, she spun me around and kissed me. Just a friendly peck, nothing more.

"I hope you have a great life, Don," Carol said.

"I hope so too. I hope you have a good life, Carol. Please express my wishes for Darleen to also have a good life."

"I will, goodbye." She closed the door.

I stood there for awhile, a matter of a few seconds then turned and went home.

* * * *

For the next forty years, I lived my life. I still pined for Darleen, just not as bad as I first had. For the first couple of years, Jane and I got together about twice a week. Mostly, Friday and Saturday nights. She found a guy who was happy for her to go out and fuck other guys. Jane and I really didn't have any feelings for each other, we just made each other feel good. I loved fucking her. That's all it was to me. That's all it was to her. She told me she really loved her new boyfriend. He said when she couldn't fuck me anymore, she should go out and find another boyfriend to fuck her.

Supposedly he like fucking her when she goes home with her cum filled pussy. He called it a cunt and she seemed to like him calling it that after she had fucked me. At the time I thought it was very strange. It wasn't until later in life I found out what he meant.

A few years after, well it was now 1972. I met a nice girl. She had graduated a year ahead of me from high school. We started going out. Within six months we had fallen in love. I did love her. I also loved Darleen, but I never mentioned her anymore. To anyone. Not even Jane. I had even stopped writing to her. On my wedding day, I told Jane, I had invited her and her boyfriend to the wedding, that we would no longer be able to get together. She said that was fine and that she was glad that she could help me. She did say why, because I had quit talking about Darleen to her, she felt I was over her. I wasn't but I didn't tell her that.

My new wife, Judy, came with two small children from her first marriage. Her first husband had been an extremely jealous man. Every time she came home late, he would accuse her of cheating on him. She then stayed home all the time and quit having sex with him. He started having people Judy didn't know over for parties. She like any good hostess helped. Her scum of a husband drugged her drinks, then had the guys he invited, to have sex with her. She remembered everything and was disgusted. He would be the last one to fuck her after all the rest had come in her pussy. He would just sneer down at her as he slammed into her sore pussy.

"Now you're a whore, whore," he said to her.

She would cry and he would laugh as every guy there had her a second time. After that first time, they sat down and talked. He apologized to her and she accepted it on the condition he never does that again. He promised. Then just two weeks later she found herself on the coffee table getting fucked by ten guys. He had drugged her again. All the guys fucked her at a minimum of three times each, some four times and two five times. Her asshole husband fucked last each round and sneered down at her once again calling her a whore.

That was the final straw, she called her brother, who came to get her and the kids. As they were walking out of the house, her husband showed up. Her brother beat the shit out him. Then they left. She divorced him and got alimony and child support, but he took off, never to be heard from again.

I met her about a year after her divorce. She was introduced to me by my current girlfriend, another classmate who was cheating on her fiancé. She wanted to be able to come down to Judy's parent's house when I was over to see me without raising suspicion with her fiancé. It was only a short time after meeting Judy that I fell in love with her. Did that love exceed the love I felt for Darleen? No. They were both at about the same level. We married and had 40 wonderful years together. The first five were normal and we had sex almost every night, except when one of the kids were sick or wouldn't go to sleep. After that first five years, the sex slowed down. The kids were older and more inquisitive.

Things really slowed down by year 10. We were both now in our mid-thirties. Then all of a sudden Judy's hormones kick in and she was horny all the time. Suddenly, I couldn't keep up with her. I was exhausted more and more of the time. I thought about how to get her what she wanted and suddenly what Jane said long ago kicked my brain into gear. I mentioned to Judy she should get herself a couple of boyfriends...she didn't even let me finish. She started by asking me if I didn't love her anymore, I didn't want her anymore. I just put my face in my hands a let her rant.

When she was finally quiet, I looked up at her. She was waiting for me to say something. I looked at her and told her I loved her. She snorted. She then looked at me closely. She asked me when the bags under my eyes started, why did I look so tired. I told her when she started wanting to make love every five minutes. And that I couldn't keep up with her libido, she was killing me. She laughed, then she saw the look in my eyes as my lids began to close all by themselves. She rushed to me and caught me before I fell off the couch.

She carefully looked me over, took my pulse and looked into my eyes. I tried to smile at her but I was so worn out I couldn't She told me she was so sorry and why didn't I say something sooner. She helped me to bed and cuddled up to me as I went to sleep. The next morning, Saturday, she asked me how she should go about looking for a boyfriend. I was stunned, but extremely excited too. I gave her Jane's number and told her to introduce herself and ask how she does it. Now she was stunned. She knew who Jane was and her husband. She shook her head, then kissed me passionately, pulled back and asked me if I had been one of Jane's boyfriends before we got married. I told her the truth, that we were.

She asked me how she could fuck me while still loving her boyfriend. I told Judy that was a question you would have to ask Jane. Then she asks what my feelings for Jane were. I told truth, I had only feelings of friendship. What we used to do was done because it made us both feel good. When I said that, I think Judy understood, not completely but partially. I told her I had no feeling of love for Jane, only gratitude for her giving me comfort when I was going through hard times. Then, later it was because I liked having sex with her. That's all it was, sex. I didn't love Jane and she didn't love me. She liked to get fucked as did I. We were both a means to an end.

Judy called Jane later that day. She was on the phone for three hours. Toward the end, I could tell they were just gossiping. Judy finally hung up, came and sat on the couch next to me. She told me she and Jane were going out together that night to look for a boyfriend for Judy. I nodded. She then went on to ask me if I would like to fuck her married pussy before it became a sullied married pussy. I pulled her to me and kissed her. I then told her I would prefer to wait until she had a sullied married pussy.

She sat there kissing me for a long time. Then looking at the clock she headed upstairs to get ready for Jane to come pick her up. I was excited and beside myself with relief. Not only would she be with another man, which I was hoping to see sometime in the future, but I would be able to get some rest. Although if she came home tonight with a pussy that had just been fucked, I would want to fuck her too. It was my pussy, not her boyfriends. I would reclaim that pussy from him.

For the next 15 years, she would always have a guy on the side. Sometimes two or three. I was happy. She was happy. She always came home to me and I fucked each and every time. I did get to see her with all of them at one time or another. She always told them she wanted to have a threesome and she had the perfect guy, her husband. Some of them balked at that. She promptly dropped them. The ones that would, she would stay with them until she got tired of them.

One day she came to me asking if I would mind if she stopped fucking around, it was beginning to bother her in her mind a little. I told, of course, it had always been up to her. We made love that night. Then I had my first heart attack. July 1, 2003. I died twice on the emergency room table. The brought me back twice using the paddles.

We had been moving around the country a lot. My job took me to many placed for extended periods of time. When retirement came around we were in Texas. Eventually, we moved back to our hometown. Then just after our forty-first anniversary, she was diagnosed with stage three pancreatic cancer.

It was a blow to both of us. I had a heart attack a month later. I was devastated. I was in the hospital for two weeks. I got over the heart attack, but not the idea I was going to lose my precious Judy. They gave her three months even with chemo. She lasted nine months without it. On July 22, 2015, just one day after her birthday, she succumbed to her cancer and passed away. Again I was devastated.

Jane came to the funeral alone. She was the last to leave with me. She took me home and made love to me. She didn't fuck me, she made slow, passionate love to me. She even told me she loved me. I told her she shouldn't, but she said she did. If she hadn't met Bill way back when she would have asked me to marry her. I was shocked and surprise. Then my heart skipped a beat and I found that I had really been in love with her all along. I told her I loved her too. She started to cry. I followed suit as the tears started to roll down my cheeks.

We said goodbye the next morning when Bill came to pick her up. I would never break her marriage up if I could help it. So I let her go with a promise if she needed a boyfriend to call me. She promised. A promise I knew she would never keep. How could we?

Three days after the funeral I received a call from a lawyer's office.

"Don Schmitt," the voice on the other asked. It was a male voice.

"Yes," I said softly.

"I'm Allen Carpenter. I was your wife's attorney..."

"Why did she have an attorney?" I asked surprised.

"That's why I'm calling. Your wife recently inherited a large sum of money and her will leaves it all to you."

"What? Who? Why didn't she tell me?"

"I'll get to all that. She inherited the money from her mother. She didn't want to tell you until your next anniversary. She was going to surprise you with it. She loved you very much. When would you like to come in and pick up the check?"

"What?" I was flabbergasted.

"Are you all right Mr. Schmitt?"

"Yes, yes, I'm fine. How much?" I asked.

"Two million dollars, net of inheritance taxes."

I dropped the phone. I sat there, my face in my hands crying. I was thinking how much I loved my wife and all the things we could have done with that money in our old age. I heard the lawyer calling my name. I picked up the phone.

"I'm here, I'm all right."

"Good. Good."

"Is today too soon?" I asked.

"No, of course not."

"Give me your address, please." He did, I wrote it down. He was close. "I'll see you in about twenty minutes."

"I'll be waiting."

"Thank you."

I hung up before he said anything else. I went and changed clothes. I had been wearing sweats, I wasn't about to talk about Judy in them. She deserved better. I was at the lawyer's office in fifteen minutes. When I walked into the office there was a very pretty blond, what I would have called a MILF. I looked at her ring finger on her left hand, she was wearing a wedding ring.

"Can I help you?" she asked smiling at me. Suddenly I felt dizzy, she reminded me of someone, yet I couldn't place her.

"I'm here to see Mr. Carpenter," I said.

"And your name sir?" she asked. I just shook my head trying to clear it.

"Mr. Carpenter, there's a man here to see you who won't give his name," she said into the phone. "Okay. Go right in sir."

Still shaking my head I went to the door she indicated and opened it and entered closing behind me. Mr. Carpenter was standing behind his desk holding out his hand. I took it in his.

"So glad to meet you, Mr. Schmitt," he said.

"Glad to meet you Mr. Carpenter, call me Don."

"And I'm Allen," he said. "Sit, sit."

I sat looking at him. He looked around his desk muttering, "Now where did that check get too. Ah, I know." He picked up the phone and dialed. "Darleen, could you bring in that envelope on your desk with DS on it?"

I didn't hear her reply. Darleen? The name brought back my memory of her. The office door opened and an arm stretched past me. Allen took the envelope and handed it to me.

"Hear you, Don..."

"Don? DS? Don Schmitt?"

I stood very quickly, knocking over the chair I had been sitting in.

"Darleen? Darleen V..." It was her, she had her mouth covered with her hands, eyes wide open. I walked around the chair and took her in my arms, she started crying and wrapped me in her arms. We stood there, her crying, me breathing so hard I thought my lungs would burst.