All Comments on 'Dave Disciplines Kristen'

by hotladyvanessa

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  • 6 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
Sexy!

Maybe she tries spankin get him for being sneaky and they find a loving femdom aspect to their open seclude. Just a thought, I gave 4 stars. Nice work, thanks for sharing!!

craigoolcraigoolover 9 years ago
Again, not tell, SHOW

Tell us the story as if watching a movie made by your clitoris.

Describe for us how you see them again, your husband pulling up her skirt, pulling down her panties, how you can smell her arousal and you start getting wet too. Describe for us hot the swats on her ass sound like gunshots in the small room as her ass wriggles, as her cheeks redden. Describe for us how your husband, emboldened by your permission, starts fingering her pussy, making her beg for another swat, making gushing sounds as he brings her to the edge, as another "KABLAM"! lands on her writhing rump.

Describe for us how you catch your husbands arm in mid swing, saying sternly "I'll take over now." as your housekeeper looks up in horror, knowing that both of you will dominate her from now on, being "encouraged" to serve you in any way you desire, as she flops like a fish in his lap as the climax overtakes her....

Remember Gibbs rule from NCIS. Don't waste good. You are too good a writer to waste it on only telling part of the story. Make your clit make you tell it all!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
I agree with craigool.

The writer should be trying to give the reader a feeling of being there. Doesn't have to be blatantly "I was there" but the style here is like a cooking show. "Then I added a ;pinch of salt and a teaspoon of paprika tells you what to do, but doesn't give you the feeling of being there

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
Great story

Nothing wrong here. Everyone is informed and had an adult descussion.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 2 years ago

4+ [4.45 = 89% (☆☆☆☆+)]!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 2 years ago

I LOVE (♡) spanking stories. I can't help it.

Anonymous
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