Demon Child Ch. 02

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Once again she lay in the dirt waiting for the next one or whatever fate brought her. A tall shadow loomed over her and barked out guttural words in the language she did not understand.

Strong hands gripped her, holding her strongly down to the earth, pulling her right arm out in an iron grip. Watching from high above, she felt a detached sense of alarm as a raider took an iron rod, glowing red with heat from a nearby fire. She shrieked in agony as he pressed the hot iron to the skin of her lower right arm. No longer able to detach, she was back in her body, struggling against the torture in her arm. Finally darkness took her.

It was still dark when Neekah woke. Her whole body hurt, but she was used to pain, she pushed the complaints of her body to a far corner of her mind. There had been too many days of pain in her life for it to command too much of her attention.

She could see the tall forms of a group of raiders standing around a fire many strides away from her. Carefully looking around she could not see any raiders standing near her. Slowly she gathered her strength, winding up like a spring. Suddenly leaping to her feet, she darted for the darkness surrounding the decimated village.

The rope tied around her ankle snapped short and she fell hard. She heard rough laughter from the fire and to her horror she felt the rope tighten and begin to drag her back towards the fire. Neekah tried to stand but the rope was tight and kept pulling her leg out from under her. Determined not to be dragged through the dirt she reached down and grabbed the rope and used it to pull herself to her feet and walked toward the fire, following the rope to the man who held it.

Standing boldly, ignoring the quivering fatigue in her legs, she faced him. It was the one she had chosen when she had walked from the group of screaming Ramaldi women, wishing to choose her fate rather than to be dragged to it. He said something harsh and short and pointed at the ground.

Neekah's silver gray eyes flashed at his face and smiling a bitter smile she once more lay down upon the ground and spread her legs. He barked in laughter and bending down to her feet he pulled them together and tied a short hobble between her ankles.

He pulled out a long knife. He pointed at the roped between her ankles and then laid the knife across her throat. He made it clear if she tried to take the ropes off her legs he would kill her.

Lifting her to stand, he barked "Ha'akh tet." He began to push her along in front of him. Neekah tried to hurry but the hobble on her ankles was too short and she tripped, falling heavily to her knees. He made a soft exasperated sound and picked her up and threw her over his shoulder. He walked a long distance from the carnage of the village. He greeted a raider as he entered a camp. Stopping before a tent, he unceremoniously dumped her to the ground, wiping his hands on his loin cloth, his nose wrinkled in apparent disgust.

He pointed at the open door of the tent and once again said, "Ha'akh tet." Neekah scrambled into the dark tent and huddled against the back wall.

Exhaustion and confusion were making it hard for Neekah to think. For some reason she was alive. Everyone she had ever known was dead. She suspected that this raider had something to do with this, but too tired to wonder why, she put her head on her knees and slept.

)===(>>>>>>>>>>>>>> <<<<<<<<<<<<<<)===(

Thank you for taking the time to read Demon Child.

If you wish to be notified of when a new chapter is posted please contact me privately. Be sure to give me a correct email address and I will be glad to send you a message when a new chapter is up.

Please do me the kindness of rating and leaving me your comments. Constructive and/or critical, public or private, raving or troll; I love to hear from you.

To those who leave anonymous feedback, I regret I cannot respond to you individually. Please accept my appreciation in advance.

xantu

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4 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 12 years ago
<3

I love this! It's so creative, and well written

Little BirdLittle Birdabout 13 years ago
Urgh

Okay, I just thought the first part was a special ugly backstory type, but this gore and women enjoying being raped seems to continue.

Is that really neccessary?

Urgh...

EtaskiEtaskialmost 16 years ago
*smiles*

Hm. I'll have to go find Ch. 01. I enjoyed this. :) The pacing is good; you covered a fair amount of time in broad description while slowing down temporarily for the telling scenes, and finally moving onto the crisis where everything changes (I've always liked that style for sci-fi/fantasy pieces. It works). I also liked that your narrative settled me into our heroine's head with ease; she's an outcast, so there's not a lot of dialogue, yet I still had a good idea what she thought/felt and why she acted.

I also liked your raider language; there was a logic behind it and I thought it fit in very well. For example, I had no trouble deciphering what a "venya" was. :P And I rather like the word; it sounds gentler, like a goddess-worshipping clan might make it sound. Your antagonists were deliciously 3-D just by having that small bit of insight in their language and culture! :) Made them more sexy. :P

The *only* things I might've yearned for in your description would have been to experience more scent and sound through Neekah. No issues with sight and touch, but I'm a big "scent and sound" person, so that's just personal preference I'm always looking for. :)

A good read! Now I *do* wonder where you will go with this...but for now I'm going to go back in time and find the first part. Cheers, Etaski

Mistress_DeziMistress_Dezialmost 16 years ago
Love this...

Please do not stop this story i love this story...

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