by snakebyte
Poorly constructed, with jumping POV throughout, dropped words, need of proof reading. Work harder. Even this unrealistic story line could have merit if better developed.
Thank you for your comment. I will try to remember your suggestions for my net story. My main gaol was to get certain things in it that were requested from the person I wrote it for, and was intended to make her happy. As that was a sucess, whatever else happens with this story is ok with me.
and stopped reading. Learn to write before you post again.
It's ok that you didn't like it anonymous, since you read so much of it. The person I wrote it for liked it and that was what was important to me
I loved it. You had some weird issues with your prose, and if corrected it would be better, but damn was this hot.
Lets have lots more of Dirty Debbie please. Good start to what could be a great novel.
I have a cpl stories with her as the main character planned. Glad you liked it
Very good story I would love to read more of this story maybe slave is no longer to wear clothes must be nude at all times even when she's ordered over to he other house ....