All Comments on '"Don't Miss," He Said Ch. 04 Pt. 01'

The story continues to be excellent, although it sometimes seems to be in the wrong category. Regardless, it is well-written. (Longer chapters would be nice, though. But regular, near-daily postings almost make up for that quibble.)

-- KK in Texas

I agree that it sometimes takes on a heavy comedy overtone, however! This is a romance at the very core! What else could bring any regular guy to sing the Ave Maria while spooning his naked girlfriend? What else but true love!?

Plus, if you take into account the real old-school definition of "romance," it should be all about adventure, conflict, challenge, death, life, perseverance, and love!

Keep it coming, Shoge-san!

I love the descriptive language and flowing sentences. However some of the idioms aren't quite right. I've never heard "boarded" used to describe getting into a car, except for a train car. Also "due courtesies and bows" bothered me until I realized you meant curtsies and bows.

I loveeee this story. Can't wait for the final part! Hope Judas gets what he deserves, the bastard.

I love this series! Keep up the amazing work! I can't wait to read more

you have a great technique and understanding of how to play up the feelings of the readers great hold on english!plz finish!

Amazing story.. Amazing author. Can't wait for the part 2...

Love the story so far. I will be waiting for part 2 to be "released".

Whatever, the story is awesome. Soon write next few parts of the story and good luck, keep writing.

but unfinished.

Nothing is unfair, life is what it is. However, I have 3 or 4 writers on Literotica

that I have considered heretofore to be of "commercial" or "real world" short story quality. The work we are reading is "unfair" since it is leagues beyond most things one reads, here or elsewhere.

None, despite their excellence, touch the talent that is creating this narrative; at times, it is at times too sparse and understanding comes slowly - however, anyone who writes knows that lean writing as we are reading here is incredibly difficult to achieve and, in my opinion, rarely achieved much better than we are reading here. Emotional response, for me, is not coming; the cold brutality has stifled it thus far and should it not come, it would reveal a weakness. Until then, however . . . .. .

Am having a hard time following the story.

a sad but beautiful story. Cannot wait until the next piece.