All Comments on 'Drive in Siblings'

I agree with the first comment. This is pure drivel. Learn basic grammar and punctuation.

you pissed off the annony assholes. Anything they hate we all love!!

I only read ten sentences when the lack of proper grammar made it too painful to continue. Please have someone edit your work, then PLEASE resubmit. I would love to read it then.

as much as I dislike saying particularly discouraging things, the sentence structure is really unfortunate. I'm not certain what is being said by whom at certain times, and honestly, to make more sense of it, I would have to go over it myself, which benefits me, and only me.

Please, see if someone would have the time, and be able to put in the effort to assist you by editing your stories. I'm sure you'll get much better responses from users.

Have a great day, and keep trying!

thanks for comments, if some that are critical can help I would be grateful maybe direct me to your posts so I can see what needs to be done to help write more appealing stories. again thanks to all.

Writer you from the hills of ARKENSAWWWW?

In Part 2, maybe Dennis can fuck Lisa in her tiny, smelly, asshole while they are at the Drive-In! Then the old man who collects tickets can rape Lisa while Dennis watches...

Good have been a good story but I'll never know, I couldn't stay with it because of the editing, and the grammar...

I was okay with the plot, but even if you have no one available to give you a hand with editing, putting the story into your Microsoft Word (paid), LibreOffice (free), or OpenOffice (free) can do a lot regarding spelling, and with 'alerts' for grammar and sentence structure. No, it's not perfect, but it will certainly help make your story all it can be.

still enjoyed the story

I think it has possibilities, but like all pices of literature, i use the term loosely, it needs to be edited for the basics. They are spelling and grammar, along with sentence structure. One of the most common problems people have when writing is they forget that they are telling a story and usually, words that you would use verbally, work very well in writing. When we are telling a story, we don't jump to first person, present tense, like we sometimes do when writing. In most cases, this doesn't work as well as just telling what happened and not trying to recreate a situation like it is happening now.

Why do people who obviously never learned a thing in English class, become adults and think they can be a writer?