All Comments on 'Eirin Ch. 02'

Very well written, you are keeping the reader interested with your diversity of characters, and a very good plot! Keep up the good work!!

Beautiful writing, incredible storyline....all in all, just amazing. I'm really looking forward to more. I had read the first part last week and have been coming here every day since then just looking for the next part to this.

Thank you!

I check every day to see what stories you have. And I reallly really love this one. Keep up the good work

to see that you have added another chapter. I really like this story, it's very well written but,....an eighteen year old, innocent virgin, held down and raped would not think that her rapist fingers felt wonderful after his brutality of her. Especially considering all of her injuries and her fear. She would not spread her legs and push into him. That part is just not realistic. Everything else is perfect. And I am wondering how you can redeem Lord Hawthorn because he is a monster right now. When he finds out the real crimes committed against Erin and how they, the father/daughter, have tricked him and stolen from Erin, I hope he feels like crap, he should. Please continue, I just rant about abuse, so forgive me for that. Yes this is fiction and your story but I feel as a woman, that Erin would never enjoy what he just did. He's a selfish bastard and did it for his pleasure.

very well written, Meg. I like the way you're slowly drawing out the character's sexual feelings. Hopefully they will begin to start realizing their emotional feelings for each other. A truly delightful read. WTG! {{hugs}}

You have no idea how happy i am to finally read another chapter:) This story is getting very very good. And i cant wait till i read some more. Im very curious how Lord Hawthorn is going to find out the truth about Eirin. :) I cant wait! Please write the next chapter as soon as possible.

I hope you submit a new chapter soon!!!

Have to agree with the other poster who pointed out that an 18 year old virgin who had been brutally raped (well, really almost any women who had been raped), is just not going to get excited by the feel of the rapists fingers in her again.<br><br>

However, every other emotion and description did feel realistic to me. The best non-consent/reluctance stories are those where the characters are allowed true emotions, or thoughts and feelings one would expect from real people. I think you are showing that to the most extent. Very good descriptions of everything! I still don't like the bastard lord, he's a fucktard to me now, but maybe you can redeem him and I'll be reading more to see if/how you do it!

only story ive truley enjoyed is this series.

Very well-written, though I share some of the others' reservations about whether she'd 'enjoy' his attentions after being raped. So will the Lord be redeemed as a character? Looking forward to finding out.

This story intrigues me. First that the start of the story I assume that you intend to deal with the whole "I sorry for raping you" thing, and redemm him in some way I hope to hear more of the story. Nice start you will only get better with time. Good Luck.

Meg I love this story. I found myself getting hard at various points throughout! The character development is just perfect!

Meg I love this story. I found myself getting hard at various points throughout! The character development is just perfect!

Can't wait for the continuation, I'm utterly addicted now.

The details of the characters and their actions make this a gem.

Keep up the fabulous work.

VVery well done. I like the Attention you give to the details, like the coals, or the servants. You put much thought into your work!

again, but really, I should go bed, but can I resist going straight to next chapter?

I really hope that you continue writing. I will die if you don't finish this story! I can't seem to stop reading.

Sorry....glad many other's like it but I found it boring....how it ever got as "hot" tag, i'll never know

probably the best series i have ever read

this truly was the best of the series..

If u could weave in the male and female reaction as it happens rather than having reader go thru the same situation twice. Otherwise it's super. well written. i gave it a 100 anyway.

I notice that the main characters are aristocrats (he's a lord, she's duke's daughter)- the plot is interesting enough. however, the language you use is too modern. too wannabe-ish and sometimes vulgar. Lord hawthorn converse like a modern day-american guy. He doesn't sound english to me at all let alone aristocrat. Try, putting 'a little' instead of 'some'. And governess does not simply call any woman a lady. It is a title- and in this case it is appalling to have said so. And why is the lord doing everything for her, including stitching her up and cleaning her when he does not even held a tendre for her?? what's servant for???

I like the idea behind this story; unfortunately, the writing leaves much to be desired.

I get the whole Cinderella appeal - poor, undeservingly mistreated rich girl on the cusp of true love, etc etc etc. I get the Little Lord Fauntleroy appeal - kind, soft spoken rich girl about to melt the heart of a cold aristocrat, etc etc etc. But does it have to be so poorly written, and yes, unbelievable? I don't find your main characters appealing at all. In fact, Hawthorn's a monster with some serious mommy issues to deal with. Eirin is... a mess. I don't even know where to begin with her. All I can say is that her height was off-putting, and to be frank, somewhat perverse. And even apart from the obvious flaws in plot and character development, you know you've got a grammar problem when your typical reader can't go through a paragraph--no, a sentence--without automatically correcting at least three mistakes. I have never been the type to abandon a story in the middle of a series (I even read the entire Harry Potter behemoth in less than a week) but I cannot force myself to read the rest of this sad piece of work. Rock on, meg1, with your run on sentences, misuse of semicolons, borderline psychotic characters, and strangely short heroines.

In short, I hated it.

Let me first tell I am by no means have an English proffesional but even I could tell you had very BIG problems! By the way, that only makes things worse if an ameatur writer can spot problems.

First of all, all the characters speak the same. In very unneeded long sentences to where no one, (even back then), would speak like at all. So I decided to just read it for erotica sake but it seems like your detail was so ungodly long, (really it shouldn't be so long for simple detail), that I just couldn't go on.

This relationship is just sex to me. They started having problems and should end with problems. And lies end with more lies. Love is something that you don't understand. It is an equal relationship that is more then sex and/or obession.

Let me lastly point out that that this man most be treating her like he would like to treat her mother. He cares for her, but has a need to punish her for leaving him behind. If he doesn't resolve this problem. That is going to be the relationship - controlling.

the people who critisized meg1 for her mistake/ or saying its boring,

who the fuck r u to say things like that????

it is literotica, not pulitzer . if u r so good reader why r u reading stories in here huh...............bunch of losers.

there is a lot of ways to point out s1s mistake, if u want to make s1 better in nything encourage them and give them true advice, not hatred fuckers.

to meg1 i love ur writing, ur effort, i read the whole story at once, u have a nice plot, just u need to edit it a little bit, or u can take help from editor.

I liked your story! We all have to start somewhere. I write on Literotica as well, and I know that I'm not the grammar expert. But hey, that's why editors exist :D Both professional and amateur!

This is so perfect! I love the fear and his initially being mean but then being really gentle. Love it so much.

Please learn something about basic female anatomy before writing erotic fiction. The hymen ("maidenhead") is not inside the vagina. It is at the external opening of the vagina.

Shut up, no one else cares \/

You need to learn some anatomy - if the maidenhead were at the opening of the vagina, many a girl would have lost their virginity to a tampon. There are a few pictures on the internet if you need them.

A woman's hymen or 'maidenhead' is on the outside of the vagina. The reason a woman doesn't 'lose her virginity to a tampon' is because there is a small hole in it as to let out menstrual fluid. I know this cus I am a med student and because once upon a time I had a hymen.

It doesn't really bother me when people get this wrong in erotica but I can't read comments about this simple part of anatomy which are wrong without correcting them.

Simple

Outside the vagina? Wow. I had a hymen, I'm a nurse, and I've changed many a child's diaper and there is nothing OUTSIDE the vagina. Reread your books. The hyman is slightly inside the vaginaAlso, while it only covers part of the vagina in some women, in rare cases it covers the entire vagina - something called imperforate hymen. Do some research before you pass information off as fact.

But for back up here's some links.

http://www.pamf.org/teen/health/femalehealth/hymen.html

http://std.about.com/od/stdsinthemedia/f/hymenfaq.htm

http://site.themarriagebed.com/biology/her-plumbing

And links about imperforate hymen:

http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/269050-overview

The hero brutally rapes her, figuring since she's not supposed to be a virgin she won't mind, then dismisses her copious vaginal bleeding afterward and the fact she is obviously traumatized by his actions as insignificant until later he literally feels the physical tearing he caused and only then stops to find out she WAS indeed a virgin, undeterred though he later masturbates with her while she is unconscious in bed and then moves on to reach the brilliant idea that the way to help her overcome her terror of him (only so he can more easily rape her again) is to force her to orgasm with his finger less than 24 hours later?

Your lead definitely puts the rot in erotica.

I have read countless of stories here on literotica and it seems that the majority of writers here have a habit of using the hymen as the indicator of a woman's virginity. It is not! Just because a woman does not have a hymen during first intercourse doesn't mean she is no virgin. Various activities especially strenuous ones can cause the stretching or tearing of the hymen (horseback riding, gymnastics etc). And since she was a late duke's daughter who just ended up with mean guardians, (oh the cinderella formula with an added twisted flavor to it.) let's just assume that she, at some point of her younger years, had been taught how to ride a horse. Oh, and not all women's vaginas are the same. Some have hymen that tear easily, some have hymen that are flexible that it does not break easily and some are probably not born with one (which could be the heroine's case).

This is the Best Series on Literotica!

The character of the lord was muddled at first, but have hopes for him now. Need to see his anger inflicted on the guardian scum.

What! The man is a lowly rapist! If one takes into account how flippantly he files his assault under 'punishment of crimes', his raping has most probably moved into the serial department! I hope she rips his brain apart from the inside so he can relax, shoot himself and not burden others with the task. Bloody cock-rot...nice story though...(cough).

What! The man is a lowly rapist! If one takes into account how flippantly he files his assault under 'punishment of crimes', his raping has most probably moved into the serial department! I hope she rips his brain apart from the inside so he can relax, shoot himself and not burden others with the task. Bloody cock-rot...nice story though...(cough).

Yes he raped her at first. Always wrong. He knows it too. He was also lied to. This was also the 1800s so lords could do this. And he has never roses her again. So stop the nonsense.