All Comments on 'Empowered Ch. 01'

Your grammar and pacing could use improvement (the intimacy between Nick and April feels a little rushed, despite you flashing back to being 8 year olds) but I already want the next chapter so you are definitely on to something. Thankyou for your bravery in posting your work and please keep it up!

Thanks a lot for your input. I wrote this chapter more as a prologue but forgot to mention it. Being my first attempt, I expected a lot of criticism but got some good feedback too. So I'm really thankful. I am about to finish the second chapter. Will try to submit it soon.